False. I quit long ago.
TND has lost a key or keys in the past six months.
True: Temporarily lost. False: Permanently lost.
TND has never bowled over 125.
True, I am always loosing keys for my job. I don’t mind being locked out of my office. 
TND has bragged to friends about his/her auto erotic exercises.
SSG Schwartz
True.
TND has been hit by a baseball.
True, of course I’ve played baseball in school.
TND has not been laid in a month.
True. 
TND has never bowled over 125.
True.
TND doesn’t wear a watch.
False; I scrape 140 when I’m in practice. If I were to go bowling now, not having gone in a year or two, I’d probably bowl right around 100.
Edit: True. I hate wearing watches.
TND has fired a compound bow.
False. But I’ve fired an M16.
TND is not currently wearing pants.
False, though I don’t think anyone here would mind if it were true.
TND has had an episode of hyperventilation.
False.
TND has at least one artificial bone.
*Must…not…make…obvious…joke… * :smack:
False.
TND has had a haircut in the last 7 days.
False.
TND is going out to dinner tonight.
False, burgers on the grill during a rainstorm. Wish I had gone out tonight.
TND is wishing someone would send HER some chocolate.
SSG Schwartz
True. I want some chocolate. And I don’t care who gives it to me.
bete"candy from strangers" noir
TND has swam with dolphins.
False. Damn!
TND is a vegan.
False. I had chicken and dumplings for dinner tonight, and stuffed orange roughy for lunch.
TND has never been on horseback.
False. I went horseback-riding quite a bit in my youth, although not lately. I’ve even ridden on a burro!
The next Doper knew that today (July 31) is the birthday (1816) of Gen. George H. Thomas, one of the Union Army’s unsung heroes.
Not even close.
TND has read all the Stephen King books.
False, just under half.
The next Doper dislikes seafood.