Satan asks...Flypsyde delivers!

Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share (MPSIMS)
#1

Okay, here you go, Prince of Darkness.

Can’t even begin to start with all the personal anecdotes, so you’ll just have to settle for the following.

Been reading furtively on this board since the Great Moderator And Censorship scandal. Unfortunately, the PC at home is pre-pentium, so I have to do all of my 'Net stuff at work. Being the civil service office drone that I am, you can understand that too much time (actually, any time at all)on the 'Net is mightily frowned upon. So, not until now have I summoned up the courage (balls) to register and post.

And I’m working on a long distance relationship myself (if an hour is truly long distance), so I’m diving head first into my own peril. Thanks for the warning.

Flypsyde

“I’m still here, asshole!”-Angus Bethune

#2

But have you ever had sex with a turtle?

C’mon… We want DETAILS! This way we can pick at your every fault until you’re a neurotic mess like the rest of us!

Religious convictions - That’s a good way to start…

Yer pal,
Satan

#3

Satan:

Nope. No convictions. I’ve been detained on religious grounds, but I was never convicted.
(The playground monitor at St. Andrew school stopped me for running in a “quiet” area, but I didn’t have to go see the principal.)

Tom~

#4

Religious convictions…uh, lessee. There is a God. I talk to him when I need to. I assume he listens. End of story. Haven’t felt the need to get up early on Sunday and have someone else tell me when/how/why/where I need to talk to him for, oh, going on 18 years now. And the last time I did was at age 6 (under duress; Grandma made me go).

Last time I checked, my given name meant “God remembers”; try that on for size next time you voulntarily do something, uh, naughty. (Self-abuse takes on a whole new guilt with that over your head.)

But no, no herpetogical intercourse here. Thanks for asking.

“I’m still here, asshole!”-Angus Bethune

#5

Flypsyde
an hour…oh my try 17 hours from the person your in a relationship with THAT SUCKS!

Love Always,
Heather Lee
XheatherleeX@aol.com

#6

Flypsyde: I agree with my baby. I long for the day I’m an hour away from Heather… Hell, in NYC, an hour is not a unreasonable COMMUTE!

Not wanting to make light, but one has to keep these things in perspective!

Okay, now we need to hear about sex. Yes, the big “S” word! I mean, this is more important than religion anyway, since even the most devout athiest will scream “Oh God” given proper motivation in this area!

So, how about your sexual opinions? You choose guys, gals or the combo platter? Any other intimate details ae good too…

#7

Ok, 17 hours gots me beat hands down. You guys win.

Ok, sex-figures it wouldn’t be too long before someone asked. Only had with one person so far, and while the actual act was more than pleasurable, the aftermath (or whatever you want to call the scam she tried to pull afterward) was uncomfortable and worrisome to say the least. But, I suppose if you stretch a one-night stand out to two weeks, you’ll get that kind of thing.

As far as preferences, only the fairer sex puts the wind in my bagpipes. No hankies here. And still no turtles.

Glad to see things worked out for you two. Gives me hope for next weekend, when I shall once again brave the terrors of Interstate 55 and try to win the heart of the fair…oh, who am I kidding.

I’ll actually just try to hit that window where I’ve had enough beer that my courage is up, but not to the point where I slur my speech.

Or drool. Both are bad.

“I’m still here, asshole!”-Angus Bethune

#8

Only one person, eh? How sweet. I guess knowing your age is a good thing here. If you say 37, given the aforementioned info, that will say ALOT about you (probably things you don’t wanna say, actually), but I’ll assume yer a young’un.

Mental note - Be nice to the young’un…

Okay, we hit religion and sex… Obviously NEITHER is a vice, so what’s your vice? If you say “Miami,” I will not be amused…

#9

Uhh, just turned 24. Doesn’t say as much as 37, but definitely says more than 16. Note that the lack of intercourse for 21 years was not for lack of desire or a wish to “save” it, but for more human (and neurotic) reasons. Intense lack of self esteem, namely.

Ok, vices. Porn. Beer.

But you want something soul-bearing and easily picked at, right?

Try this one on for size. Trying very hard to date someone an hour away who I’m not completely sure has picked up on the fact that I want to date her,or, if she has, has done everything in her power to stay completely vague about the whole situation. AND I only get to see her about once every 6 weeks.

Yeah, folks, if you see the guy drving down 55 in a red Jeep with a big fat “I’m a fucking moron, please take me out of YOUR misery” hat on, that’s me. Feel free to aim at me with larger vehicles. Thanks. 'Preciate it.

If you need another scab, Satan, Just let me know. I’m sure I’ve got more.

“I’m still here, asshole!”-Angus Bethune

#10

I heard someone say “beer.” Sure I’ll have a cold one. And get one for the whole thread; put it on my tab.

“The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.” - Humphrey Bogart

#11

Jesus, Flyp. I just had to check your profile to make sure you weren’t one of my ex-boyfriends.

shiver

#12

Hey, Unc, make mine a Rolling Rock.

And Bead, I’m assuming that my post was a bad reminder of a past boyfriend (unless he was so good he made you shiver). I have to ask, though-what was so reminiscent? What set off the bells?

“I’m still here, asshole!”-Angus Bethune

#13

I just saw some personality similarities, and various details like the age and other personal details were the same as well.

And if it were bad, I would have shuddered instead of shivered. :wink:

#14

Okay, Flypsyde. You seem to be into this soul-baring concept. This is a good way to intigrate yourself to the board regs - ask kellibelli…

I think I’m done with this witness. If I’m not careful, I’ll wind up asking you something retarded like, “If you were a tree, what kind of tree would that be?” Barbra Walters, I am decidedly NOT!

But I have to admit that your a perceptive chap, Flypsyde… One of your first posts was to invoke ME, and everyone here knows that I’m an egotistical asshole… :slight_smile:

Post forth and prosper!

#15

Okay, unless someone else wants to continue the psychological vivisection, I’m content to let this thread sink slowly off the list.

Any other questions, catch me in another thread.

“I’m still here, asshole!”-Angus Bethune