Scott Baio is 45, Single, and in need of Career Guidance

I remember watching some show on child stars at one point and Scott Baio was used as a good example: he never did drugs (at least not problematically if he did), sued his parents, went broke, etc., he or his managers took really good care of his money (I think Charles in Charge, though a dreadful show, really set him up because of co-ownership), and that’s why his new reality series is a puzzlement. Anybody else see this?

I caught it channel-surfing today. Working on the advice of a sexy life-coach, he has to confront his many ex-girlfriends (starting with his first sex first ex Erin Moran) to find out why he’s so terrified of commitment, and while doing this he must be celibate and have little contact with his current squeeze. At one point he goes to an autograph show with Moran, whining and kvetching the entire way there about how much he hates those things and hates being identified as Chachi, but that again begs the question “then why are you doing a reality show and having Erin Moran as the first episode” (and btw, she needs to stay out of the sun- she’s got some serious lines).

I think he should find out he’s gay during sweeps and end up in a menage-a-trois with the two Coreys. (True, neither of them is gay, but I’m sure they’d be willing to do anything for a series.)

Anyway, more a MPTIMS I suppose, but this is just one of the weirder reality shows. Even his agent objects to the show.

And what the hell is a “Life Coach”? It’s a phrase I’ve heard for years but it sounds indistinguishable from a therapist.

So are you going to watch the next episode?

I doubt it. I only watched this one because-

1- channel surfing while waiting for a contracter (my ceiling caved in, but that’s another story)

2- it was Erin Moran so there’s the “I grew up with her” thing

For those who didn’t see it, incidentally, she made a couple of jokes about his lack of endowment and hit him up to go to the signing with her (which I think was her main reason for agreeing to meet him). I think she’s officially out of the biz- she just does occasional guest shots but doesn’t have illusions of one day being huge again, so I like her (plus she was in the great video of which this is a horrible recording).

At least he appeared on Arrested Development as slick attorney Bob Loblaw (author of Bob Loblaw’s Law Blog).

“Don’t talk gibberish to Bob Loblaw!”

I am deeply disappointed to find no nipple-related questions being investigated about Scott Baio.

And… isn’t one of the Coreys dead? The druggie one? Er… the not-as-plump druggie one. Haim, not Feldman. I think. Which would make a threesome rather… well, let’s just think about the nipple thing instead, 'k?

Both Coreys are alive, although Haim had been in a coma for a bit due to a drug overdose and was selling clumps of his hair and a rotten tooth on eBay (until eBay pulled the auction because you’re not allowed to sell body parts).

Feldman was on that reality show, what’-it-called, and actually seems to be less nuts than the dweebier Corey.

No idea on the staus of either’s nipples.

I like how there are some stars in there who weren’t actually child stars like Jeff Conaway from Grease. Does being incredibly old automatically mean anything you did before the age of 30 was when you were a child? 8, 28 what’s the difference? He’s a million years old now and that’s what matters.

Perhaps one day I’ll defintively know the difference, but for now, I’ll just hazard a guess that you don’t need a license or a board certification to be a “Life Coach”.

Actually, I got the pilot free on iTunes and I thought the show was pretty good. I’m not sure exactly how a show like this gets set up and I assume that the whole “eight weeks with no girlfriend” thing was set up before the taping (otherwise, what an amazing coincidence that the life coach puts an eight week restriction on someone in an eight week show!). Given the choice of this, Breaking Bonaduce, Shooting Sizemore, any incarnation of The Surreal Life or its Flav-related hellspawn, this is a clear winner. Baio seems like a reasonably together person having a bit of an existential crisis at just the right time to land a series and get paid for it. It’s interesting without being freakshow.

I can’t say as I ever cared one way or the other about Erin Moran but she is definitely in the plus column for no other reason than she spoofed herself in an episode of the great and vastly underrated show G vs E.

And yes, Scott Baio has nipples.

Corey Haim Today

I liked it. He does seem genuinely interested in figuing out his shit.

I look forward to the confrontations with the ex-es. His douchey wannabe friend looks like he’ll be a good source of reality tv “squirm”.

I think he seems like a total dick. It’s not really difficult to figure out why he hasn’t been able to maintain mature relationships with women.

He understands the “what” but not the “why.” He spoke of hitting a wall in his relationships where he stopped caring about the other person but he doesn’t know why he hits that wall or how to get past it. From his phone call with Henry Winkler he seemed to be putting a lot of blame for it on the easy answer of his TV fame until Winkler pointed out that he, Winkler, had even greater TV fame and has been married to the same woman for decades.

Well, he’s extremely immature. Henry Winkler went on to do other acting roles, Baio was pretty much done after Charles in Charge. He had enough money to party and keep the blondes at his disposal, he has had no reason to be anything other than a “player.” Now he’s getting older and he’s finally realizing that what was cool in your '20s is just kinda pathetic in your '40s.

Obviously he’s not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

Speaking of reality shows…
The Two Coreys.

I haven’t seen Scott Baio’s show because, well, I don’t care. But I do remember thinking, when I saw the commercials, that it seemed to have a more interesting premise than most other reality shows revolving around defunct celebrities. They all seem to consist of, “Let’s follow this person around with a camera throughout their mundane day and then sit them down and ask them mundane questions about it all!”

Watching him, I kept thinking “I wonder if Scott knows that fellow horndog well-to-do has-been Bob Crane was killed by a sleazoid pathetic hanger-on?”.

I see he finally got the help he needed to kick that cute phase.

According to Wikipedia, Baio has banged Joanie from Happy Days, Baywatch actresses Pamela Anderson, Erika Eleniak and Nicole Eggert, Natalie Raitano, Nicolette Sheridan, Brooke Shields, Denise Richards, and Heather Locklear.

I think the last thing in the world he needs is a life coach.

Rather a sharp plummet to complete skeaze.

How shallow are you that this is how you measure success?

Kurt Cobain (sp?) had wealth and fame, but he still blew his brains out. Tons of actors and musicians have had wealth, fame and all the hotties they could handle, and still killed themselves with drugs or alcohol, many trying to dull the pain of whatever demons they were battling in their heads.

What does Baio have, besides a record of female conquests that many men envy? He’s not wealthy, he’s no longer famous, he’s not “successful”. He’s got NOTHING.