Without boring you with the details, I want some vengeful-deity style revenge on my ex-wife.
The short version of the story: She ran off with my (married) best friend, leaving me to clean up a huge financial mess that she left behind. It has been a few years, but I recently learned that she’s back in my area. She’s an asshat, but I’d like to find an elegant way to make sure she knows that.
Judging from the bile and vitriol spewed forth here daily, I thought maybe y’all would like to help me exact my vengeance.
Here we go. I knew this was coming. She screws you over in just about the worst possible way and you’ll…sign her up for junk mail? What kind of lame-ass revenge is that? It’s like a minor annoyance that she won’t even recognize as an attack. That is Jr. High level vengence at best.
Seriously, anything that she truely deserves probably can’t be discussed here. The other stuff are silly pranks.
The best thing that you can do for yourself is to live a great life and never think about her anymore. This has the added benefit of being rightous revenge.
Revenge never solved anything- and when it is found out, leads either to a cycle of more revenge, or sharing a cell with “Bubba”.
Don’t do it.
Ok, if you must. Find out when she will be going to a social event, like a ball or something. Show up in a real spiffy leased car, in a super nice suit, and get somebodies trophy wife or even an escort (nothing trashy looking though) to go with you and gaze at you adoringly. Find one of the bigwigs at the event- who is also divorced. Explain the situation. Get him to make a fuss over you- maybe call out your name & have you stand up- as a “great guy and a major asset to the communtity”. He’ll do it- (Hell- I’d do it), he has walked a mile in your moccasins.
This will make her jaw drop, think she made a huge mistake, and make her feel lower than snake shit.
And- it is all legal, and better- not immoral.
Don’t do any of that immature cheap juvenile and illegal crap.
But think how you’ll feel when she says: “Sidewinder? Is that you? Oh, dear – I thought you were over me by now. But that really is a sweet gesture; I’m really touched that you wanted to make an impression on me. Listen, call me sometime!”
Wow, I must admit to being impressed. I thought I had better post this in the Pit for fear of eliciting a slew of “dead gopher in a coffee can” responses that might not be appropriate elsewhere.
Sidewinder that’s got to hurt, I wish you well. But it doesn’t bode well for you that you are tracking her down.
I’d just run across her on the mall or something and ignore her. If she talks to you I’d just say “What makes you think I have any interest in talking to you? Goodbye, take care… or don’t, either way leave me alone”. Say it naturally and chalk it up to yourself as “letting go”. Remember - she’s history and you are better off now! Maybe it’ll peak her interest too and give you new opportunities to show her just how much she has been forgotten as a bad mistake.
I absolutely guaranty you (like other posters) that nothing will rub her off more than knowing you pulled yourself together and are doing well.
I’m not really comfortable with the idea that you might boil her rabbit.
If it’s been a few years and you’re still thinking about pschological revenge, then getting away from you was the smartest thing she ever did. I suggest you find a hobby to take your mind off your misery.
Oh, make some friends too. Don’t drive by her place to see if she’s in. Rent the video “War of the Roses” and watch it. Get your own life and leave hers alone.
She’s already proven that she’s smarter and meaner than you, so revenge will only give her an excuse to really fuck you up next time. Then you’ll be crying to us about the restraining order and the unfairness of probation. Get a massage instead.
