Being called some names in another thread made me think of some self deprecating statements I have used for myself.
I’ve called myself a cheap ass Polack many a time. In recent years I’ve more readily referred to myself as a fat old man. And I’ve referred to myself as a Luddite more than once (tho I’m not entirely sure how much of an insult that necessarily is.)
I frequently refer to myself as a useless artist when I say, “I have a degree in Creative Writing… that’s why I’m working in a totally different field!”
I often call myself fat, but then follow it with, “It’s obvious that I’m marrying a chef, huh?”
I often say that my grammar is a crime against nature, as English is my second language.
That being said, it is fun to almost see the brain gears of very extreme posters grind to a halt in their heads trying to process the fact that other posters agree with me after presenting convincing evidence on a subject. (Extreme posters usually dismiss the evidence and assume that others will also dismiss it after demonstrating with no effort that I have problems with English.)
But it is true; your grammar can make others, especially in this board, assume that you are not even at their level.
“Sorry - Trivia is my life”
(said when I toss off a random factoid in the middle of a normal back-and-forth conversation - I’ll toss it out to see if they bite and self-identify as trivia-minded)
“Pardon my geekiness”
(said regularly during discussions that veer into work and play areas I am passionate about when I dig in a bit too deep)
I often use a partially-remembered Simpsons line, “God help me, I’m just not that bright.”
I also sometimes make joking references to my “surface-of-the-moon complexion” (As a teenager, I inadequately addressed my acne issues. Don’t be like me, kids!) In one of my friend’s wedding photographs, I appear in an odd orange light – I think it was on a dance floor. I remarked to him that I looked like an old, hammered copper pan.
“He was a man, take him for all in all, I shall not look upon his like again”–“I couldn’t have said it better myself!”
“She walks in beauty, like the night of cloudless climes and starry skies; and all that 's best of dark and bright meet in her aspect and her eyes”–“I couldn’t have said it better myself!”