Being called some names in another thread made me think of some self deprecating statements I have used for myself.
I’ve called myself a cheap ass Polack many a time. In recent years I’ve more readily referred to myself as a fat old man. And I’ve referred to myself as a Luddite more than once (tho I’m not entirely sure how much of an insult that necessarily is.)
I often say that my grammar is a crime against nature, as English is my second language.
That being said, it is fun to almost see the brain gears of very extreme posters grind to a halt in their heads trying to process the fact that other posters agree with me after presenting convincing evidence on a subject. (Extreme posters usually dismiss the evidence and assume that others will also dismiss it after demonstrating with no effort that I have problems with English.)
But it is true; your grammar can make others, especially in this board, assume that you are not even at their level.
I often use a partially-remembered Simpsons line, “God help me, I’m just not that bright.”
I also sometimes make joking references to my “surface-of-the-moon complexion” (As a teenager, I inadequately addressed my acne issues. Don’t be like me, kids!) In one of my friend’s wedding photographs, I appear in an odd orange light – I think it was on a dance floor. I remarked to him that I looked like an old, hammered copper pan.