Assuming one has the military buzzcut; having actual hair tends to slow the process down.
Good thing you didn’t post the same attitude about a smoke break, or you might have spawned a multipage trainwreck in the Pit. The anti-smoking fetishest around here sure are selective about what allowances are acceptable in a coworker.
Everyone has to dump. That’s a fact, Jack.
Does posture have anything to do with it?
I occasionally read that sitting on the throne is an ‘unnatural’ posture, but I don’t have a good idea what the natural one would be. Squatting with the knees and out it comes? How would that improve things?
That sounds like a Mike Patton / Mr. Bungle lyric! 
It’s not constipation. It’s the period between portions getting there. I’d prefer not to go more than once a day, so I have pauses where I’m just sitting there waiting. It’s not stuck, too hard, or even nearby, it just didn’t get there yet.
Yeah, I wish.
I had a serious intestional infection about a month ago and was hospitalized for about a week. During that time, I had the runs really bad. I used to be a “slow-goer” in the throne-room, but during this period, I started moving pretty fast. Since then, the doctor has had me avoiding carbonated beverages for 30 days, so I’ve been drinking only water. My bathroom breaks are now very quick. While I might sit for a few minutes just to relax or do some reading, the actual activites are over with quite quickly now. I suspect it’s due to the increase in water intake. Prior to my doctor instructing me to stay away from carbonated beverages, I drank probably 90% soda (sometimes diet, sometimes not) and probably 10% something else, sometimes milk, sometimes water.
I’ll be watching closely when I’m allowed to start drinking soda again to see if things change. I’m going to try and keep my water intake up as well.