In the 1990”s I read an article in the Toronto Star stating that people who close their eyes during sex with a partner are masturbating. The article also said that people who close their eyes during sex are fantasizing about someone other than their partner. In addition to this article, I have also been told that I am a prude because I like the lights down low during sex and because of my refusal to act out during sex. I had a kind of sexual confidence at that time and I was happy. I don’t know why but this article had a profound effect on me.
I have recently learned that 70% of people close their eyes during sex while 30% need visual stimulation and strong visual acknowledgement. Both are ok. People who have sex together usually do so because they find each other appealing but 70% don’t need to look or be looked at intensely during the sex act. Most of the 70% close their eyes to fantasize and open them sometimes. Closing your eyes and fantasizing is fuel for arousal and one can appreciate their partner and feel close to them through touch and the other senses. One can say that if you were blind you would see.
My problem is with those who are acting like the thought police. What business is it of theirs if a person is fantasizing about the girl or boy next door or some other scene that they imagine. It is about fantasy not reality – fuel for arousal and mutual satisfaction not detachment. Perhaps sex education in schools should be more about helping students realize where they fit and that each orientation is ok. It would eliminate the animosity between the orientations. It would also help students to not model their sexual behaviour by what they see in the media. A good thing to teach would be to never feel ashamed of our fantasies when we close our eyes. These thoughts are personal and they belong to each individual.
I think some of the 30% act out in public to validate their orientation and they are highly criticized for it. I believe that if there was better education and discussion there would be better understanding and acceptance for the 30%
Please note that the General Questions forum is for questions with factual answers.
This seems more like something that you just wanted to share, which makes it better suited to our MPSIMS forum. If you want other people’s opinion on this topic, let us know and we can move it to our IMHO forum.
Moving thread from General Questions to Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share (MPSIMS).
I usually have my eyes close during partnered sex, and not because I’m fantasizing - but because having visual input is distracting to me. I’ll open them from time to time but usually I have to concentrate just on my senses of touch(primary), hearing (secondary), and smell (distant third). Otherwise I can’t get off.
When it’s just me and my vibe, it’s different - I have to keep my eyes open to read my smut!
In the 1990”s I read an article in the Toronto Star stating that people who close their eyes during sex with a partner are masturbating. The article also said that people who close their eyes during sex are fantasizing about someone other than their partner. In addition to this article, I have also been told that I am a prude because I like the lights down low during sex and because of my refusal to act out during sex. I had a kind of sexual confidence at that time and I was happy. I don’t know why but this article had a profound effect on me.
I have recently learned according to Web MD that 70% of people close their eyes during sex The other 30% seem to need visual stimulation and strong visual acknowledgement. Both are ok. People who have sex together usually do so because they find each other appealing but 70% don’t need to look or be looked at intensely during the sex act. Most of the 70% close their eyes to fantasize and open them sometimes. Closing your eyes and fantasizing is fuel for arousal and one can appreciate their partner and feel close to them through touch and the other senses. One can say that if you were blind you would see.
My problem is with those who are acting like the thought police. What business is it of theirs if a person is fantasizing about the girl or boy next door or some other scene that they imagine. It is about fantasy not reality – fuel for arousal and mutual satisfaction not detachment.
Perhaps sex education in schools should be more about helping students realize where they fit. It would also help students to not model their sexual behaviour by what they see in the media.
Seems a very biased assumption.
Masturbating, if your eyes are closed?
You may be looking in any direction. Maybe at a particular part of your partner’s body. Maybe you are doing it doggie style and neither of you are face to face or eyes open.
The idea is without much merit. It supposes limited particular positions. Then supposes that eyes closed has one intent.
To state that having eyes closed during sex, means that the person is dissociated from their partner, seems to indicate a particular bias to low self esteem to the person positing the theory.
Dude, 50% of the things people write about what you should do during sex are wrong. The other 50% are damn wrong. If everybody is happy, don’t let it bother you. The writer of that article might not be getting any, and is mad.
Could be the opposite. Eyes open is too arousing and in an effort to hang on at least until she gets off the eyes may be closed so that one may think about gardening. Then again, I suppose that is fantasizing.
Knowing the Toronto Star, the article was probably some radical feminist going on about the implications of the patriarchy in intergender relationships, and you should just ignore it for the leftist dreck that it is.
