Well, as we are all very intelligent people here (seeing as we’re fighting ignorance and all.) I must ask a very imporant question.
What is the BEST Simpsons episode of all time?
I figured that the most intelligent people in the world (us) must all watch the show (with the possible exception of the last rwo seasons,) due to the fatc that it bloody rules.
I don’t remember them going to JAPAN???
I like the one where Bart gets a fake ID, and he, Millhouse, Martin and Nelson rent a car. I liked the one where Bart sells his soul to Millhouse, and the one where Bart falls in love with Jessica Lovejoy.
The one where Homer and Marge go one the retreat to save their marraige and Homer tries to catch the giant catfish. Some of the best one liners were from that episode.
[Marge] He blows his nose in the towels and puts them back in the closet.
[Homer] I only did that a couple of times.
They fly on standby, just beating out the Flanders. After blowing all of their money, they work in a fish(squid?) processing plant. They eventually earn enough cash to get back by participating in a game show. To win the cash, the whole family needs to go across a rope ladder suspended above a volcano. Just as they’re about to fall into the volcano, they discover that the lava was just orange soda, and the audience has a laugh at the expense of the stupid Americans.
I love the Halloween episodes. My favorite story was the one where Homer builds a time machine out of a toaster; he winds up in prehistoric times, and whenever he steps on a bug or sits on a lizard he drastically changes history (a takeoff on an old sci-fi short story, I think). Every time he tries to fix things it gets worse. That episode has two of the funniest lines I’ve ever heard on the show:
Homer comes back to find the family more or less normal, except that Ned Flanders is ruler of the universe; Flanders greets everyone by saying “Hi-diddly-ho, slave-erinos!!”
Homer comes back after leaving a world that apparently had never heard of donuts. He sees Marge and asks “Quick! What’s my name? What year is it? What of donuts? WHAAAAATTT??”
Another of my favorite lines is from an episode I can’t quite recall, but Rev. Lovejoy gives his views on tolerance with an eye towards Apu: “We respect all religious beliefs, be they Christian, Jew, or… miscellaneous.”
One I liked really well was the one where they go to that funeral and Homer/Bart/Lisa are singing songs and are really happy…
Marge- STOP! we’re going to a funeral for god sake
Homer- (singing) Ding-dong the witch is dead…
Bart- which old witch?
Homer- THE WICKED WITCH!
and there’s the one…
Marge- you know Homer, standing that close to the tv can be harmful
Homer- so can talking while the tv is on!
and another…
Wiggum is in his police car in pursuit, Homer along for the ride and all of the sudden the car they’re after turns out its lights
Wiggum- OH NO, GHOST CAR!!! SCREEEEEEEECH!
Homer- hold me
Wiggum- only if you hold me
and…
Homer- no tv and no beer make homer go something, something
Marge- crazy?
Homer- don’t mind if I do! BLAH!!! GRRR!!!
and…
(after dropping the last peanut)
Homer- doh
(feels under the couch)
Homer- moldy…slimy, ooooh moving…what’s this?..oh man, its just a 20 dollar bill
Homers Brain- but 20 dollars can buy MANY peanuts
Homer- explain
Homers Brain- money can be exchanged for goods and services
Homer- WOO HOO!
I wish my puny little brain could remember more funny quotes but what r ya gonna do.
The Cartridge Family don’t know if it was shown in the states but it was on a video over here in Ireland. Homer gets a gun and joins the NRA. It is soooo funny but also makes a point.
Also the one with Tomacco and the one with John Walters and the gay steel workers who are still reaching for that rainbow
A programme that has run for so long with such quality throughout. It’s hard to pick just one.
oh yeah and another one that really made me laugh…
(pulling gun trigger while its pointed at clerk)
Clerk- whoah there, careful Annie Oakley
Homer- I don’t hafta be careful, I got a gun!
Clerk- you probably want the accessory kit…holster, silencer, loudener, speed cocker…
Homer- ooooh I like the sound of that!
Clerk- …and this is for shooting down police helicopters
Homer- I don’t need anything like that…yet…Just give me my gun!
Clerk- sorry the law requires a 5 day waiting period, we got to run a background check
Homer- 5 days?!? BUT I’M MAD NOW!!! I’d kill you if I had a gun
Clerk- yeah well, you don’t
My top three favorites are probably:
Homer Works for Scorpio
Homer the Beer Baron
Homer Quits Church
not the actual titles, but you know what I’m talking about. No doubt people can list others and I’d go “Oh yeah!” but those three always make me drop whatever I’m doing and watch.
“I don’t know where you magic pixies came from…but I sure do like your pixie drink!” --Barney
“Marge, don’t discourage the boy. Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It’s what separates us from the animals! …Except the weasels.” --Homer
“Ooh! Floor pie!” --Homer
Bart: We were just planning the father-son rafting trip.
Homer: Heh heh…you don’t have a son.
The “Guatemalan Insanity Peppers of Quetzelsacatenango” episode with Johnny Cash providing the voice for Homer’s coyote spiritual guide. Hands down the best animation sequence when Homer stumbles out into the desert.
[Homer]
“Now give some inner peace or I’ll mop the floor with you.”
1)Bart and the Mob
Lawyer: “Could your son really be the leader of a criminal organization?”
Homer: "Well, not the leader…
2)Homer works for the Super-villain
Homer’s boss: “Homer, if you could kill somebody on the way out, I’d really appreciate it.”
3)Lisa’s date with density
Nelson: “I’m still wicked bad, though.”