Since I'm not allowed to him to his face...

So I found out my best friend’s boyfriend cheated on her. Apparently he and some of his buddies picked up two skanks at a bar, took them home and ran a train on them. I know I’m not supposed to get involved. I know I shouldn’t say anything, just listen and be supportive, but if I don’t get this off my chest, I’m gonna scream. I want to tell him how I feel so badly, but I know how relationships work and someday they may get back together and I’ll be left looking like an ass. I wrote the following e-mail to him and decided to post here instead of sending it. Thank you so much you guys for letting me vent. If I could say something to him, this is what I’d say:

Hey Ryan,
First let me begin by saying that I’m sorry to hear that your grandfather is ill. I can only imagine the added stress you are feeling right now, especially since Melissa is not there with you, I can only say that I’m sorry for what you are going through. I’m only writing this because in your previous e-mail to me you specifically said - and I quote**" Anyway, if you have any thoughts or ideas, PLEASE communicate them to me." **

Well, here’s my thoughts:
I know in my heart that I shouldn’t get involved. That some day Melissa may forgive you and I’ll just end up looking like a nosy little asshole know it all, but I just can’t not say anything. I’m just shocked, and confused, and I need to express myself in the only non-violent way I know how. I really can’t say much to you about what has happened other than, ewwww Ryan. I am really quite shocked that Michelle is the reason you gave up Melissa. I really half expected it to be something more tangible and meaningful. I thought perhaps it was an affair of the heart and someone had truly fallen madly in love with you. Instead, you just decided to fuck with a mad woman. Worse still, you decided to fuck with a mad woman and her evil retarded twin. I don’t think you could have chosen two more disgusting, skanky, slutty, pathetic, did I say disgusting, people to do this with. I am truly just in shock, and if I’m in shock, I can only imagine how devastated poor Melissa is. I can’t even begin to comprehend the pain she is going through. She has been amazing through this whole ordeal. She’s been very calm, and level headed. You’re lucky that I’m not your girlfriend - you would still be doubled over in pain.

Just so you know, she really really wanted to believe in you. She was actually entertaining the bullshit “stalker” story you made up as plausible. She would have given anything to believe you - it’s just too bad she couldn’t. I just feel really badly that in a small way, because I introduced Michelle into the group, I am a little bit responsible, then my logical mind takes over and the reason I kicked Michelle out of the circle is because she was just too skanky and high school for us. And yet, you seemed to forget this when she and her slut friend walked into the bar. I guess what they say about men is true, when they are thinking with their cocks nothing else matters. But if how I heard the story is true, Jay wasn’t so enamored with the concept of pussy that he forgot to leave. He kept his dick in his pants and then took off, because he realized that the person he had at home was more valuable than the used, nasty, crusty, smelly, cavernous, slimy holes that were waiting for him. He wasn’t so overcome by the smell of putrescent filth that was emanating from those whores that he forgot about his wife. You should have left, you should have not even been there. You chose them over Melissa, you chose to give up your girlfriend for random, not even good, pussy and that’s what I have issue with. I also have issue with the fact that you couldn’t even choose random pussy - you had to choose someone that you could practically guarantee would get you caught. Were you even smart enough to cover your tracks? NO, you did the stupidest thing I could possibly think of, with the skankiest whore on the planet, and you left yourself open to attack. You made your girlfriend vulnerable to attack, and you allowed a worthless piece of shit like Michelle to hurt her. You practically placed a bull’s-eye on Melissa’s back by being with Michelle.

Michelle is petty, and small, and she values herself so little, she had sex with you and your crew. What kind of person does things like that? The kind of person that calls your girlfriend at work to tell her what a piece of shit you are because you won’t give her another go. The kind of person that knows your girlfriend, has slept in her house, has pretended to be her friend and part of her crew, then has sex with her boyfriend and who ever else was sitting with you at the bar.

How could you not have known that people like her don’t get fucked and forgotten? How could you not have known that your actions have consequences? Jay knew, that’s why he left. How could you have been so disrespectful to Melissa?

I’m just shocked, and angry. I would have absolutely no cause to be angry with you if you had slept with anyone else other than Michelle. You could have screwed ½ the population of Canada for all I care, but you chose to fuck around with Michelle. Why, with all the other skanks on the planet, would you sleep with someone that is not only disgusting, but part of your circle? That’s the equivalent of me or Chave or Monica2 sleeping with Jay, or Justin after having sat and had drinks with Shannon and Rosie. It would be wrong, and disrespectful, not just because we are cheating, but because we are cheating with someone that has, even peripherally, been considered a friend. It’s a double affront - you not only pissed in Melissa’s mouth, you punched her in the stomach to make her swallow - and what’s worse you punched her in the stomach, just to please Michelle. Her and her rotten pussy is the reason your girlfriend is in pain. You and your dick are the reason Melissa’s life is upside down right now. You and your constant childish need to please yourself, your inability to keep your dick in your pants is the reason she has to leave her home, leave her life and start all over. She should be resting right now, She should be enjoying the fact that after all her hard work, she finally finished school. She should be looking forward to the rest of her life. She should be happy right now, and she’s not… because of you. Was is worth it? I sure hope you got the ride of your life because anything less would tear me up inside if I was you. You traded a diamond for a dollar. How was it?

I know that I probably shouldn’t have said these things to you. That it really isn’t any of my business. But you chose to make it my business when you chose Michelle as your skank partner. If you really wanted this to be a secret tryst, that no one found about and no one judged you on, then you wouldn’t have chosen a person like Michelle. Part of me has to believe that you aren’t really that stupid - that you had to know this would get out and that was your subconscious way of ruining your relationship. I don’t have to forgive you, what I think doesn’t matter. All you have to do now, is make it up to Melissa. I understand that you guys are going to attempt a friendly relationship - she’s a better person than I am - I guess we’ll be seeing you around - when we’re with Melissa.

I wish I could say these things to him. I wish I could pound him into dust for her. I really wish I could wave a magic wand and make her feel better. I’m really angry right now and I’m so glad you guys are here to let me vent. Thank you.

A 125 views and no replies-- is that a record?

My simplistic thought is this-- no good deed goes unpunished. Staying out of it is the way to go.

If my assumptions are correct, you have absolutely no problems with the actual affair. You’re only concerned with who Ryan did, not what Ryan did.

Oh wait, I don’t need to assume anything. You flat out said that was the case.

Monty2, I think you need to take a step back from this situation, I mean a football field leap back, and see in what order your priorities should be. If you hate Michelle that much, then send the damn letter off to her. But this is a letter to Ryan about what HE did and the harm HE caused. There’s where your anger should be.
Stop trying to blame the skank. She didn’t cheat on anyone.

Ryan is his own penis’s asspuppet. Clearly he has yet to learn rule number one of being a man:

“Rule #1: Do NOT listen to your penis. It will give you consistantly BAD advice.”

For the ladies: yes, our penises talk to us. The smarter of us learn to ignore them. I can’t even mention some of the crazy shit my penis has tried (unsuccessfuly) to get me to do.

Fucking dicks…

Is there anyone with whom it is okay to pull a train?