Whether you like it or not remains completely irrelevant to the fact that all relationships contain aspects of dominace and submission. Hell, gender roles are prescribed in most religious teachings I am aware of – with the female normally assigned the submissive role. Not necessarily what one observes in real life.
It can be argued – and I would – that those involved in Ds relationships simply take it a step further by recognizing their own tendencies and trying to find a suitable partner. Which simply makes them like anybody else, if with a bit of a twist in the quailfying process. In my experience, laying it on the line from the start can help avoid/lessen the power-struggles and inherent hypocrisy found in many a relationship after the initial honeymoon stage. It is also worth noting that, contrary to popular belief, there are no ‘set’ rules for Ds, nor are the roles, necessarily, fixed. IOW, it can be used as a healthy tool for both, getting to know yourself better as well as your partner. I’ll also add that the couple-dynamics engaged in while involved in a Ds relationship are not necessarily restricted to the sexual arena. IOW, for some, it can be an outlet for bedroom play, for others, it can become a 24/7 affair. But even in the latter case, I hesitate to use the term "lifestyle’ if only for the many negative connotations usually implied by the term when used in mainstream society. Bizarre, sick, deviant, perverted, come quickly to mind. In short – if there are any hopes of such a thing at this point – Ds is what you, and your partner, want to make of it.
And no, contrary to what sinful apparently thinks, porn movies are NOT a good source of information on Ds. Which, BTW, also differs greatly from SM. More info here:Ds infopack
Gay Porn is unfair to actresses who are suspiciously absent from Gay Porn. The Glass Celing is so low in Gay Porn that women can’t even get in the door. We demand that women start getting leading roles in Gay Porn NOW!
What makes you think that women don’t want to be in happy, care free porn! Just because porn is on the lighter side doesn’t mean that a woman couldn’t play the part.
I don’t care for porn, and I think there is good reason for feminists, women, and humans in general to be concerned about some kinds of porn, but I also think Sinful really should have started another thread. Her screed had only the most tenuous relationship to the OP, and wasn’t suited for Cafe Society anyway.
Avalonian: excellent post, and 100% agreement from this dirty old man…
Now, personally, I don’t like rape scenes in porn. I don’t go for Japanese tentacle scenes, or chase scenes where a woman tries to get away from rapists…
But no one has ever seriously shown that even these cause people to go out and commit rape.
(I did have one doctor tell me that very violent porn – simulated cutting with knives, for instance – might cause some people to become more violent in real life. But I’ve heard a lot of other people say otherwise.)
And as for whether or not women are better off today than they were fifty years ago… Sheesh! How many women were CEOs of large corporations in 1953? How many women had high military rank? How many women had significant independent incomes? How many women owned real estate?
Just talking about the U.S. of A.; the improvement in women’s rights has been almost as remarkable as the improvement in civil rights for blacks! Anyone who denies this is helping spread the worst kind of ignorance.
So, give me smut, and nothing but… Yet I do prefer it if it is at least a little subt…le.
I think it has something to do with giant sentient squid. Which brings us back to the Japanese tentacle porn…
Save those panties. I’ll sell them on E-bay!
We really need to get busy expanding the scope of our pitting. I fear our skills have diminished over time. Sinful’s porn opinion is just a puff of smoke compared to the raging brush fire of her ignorance.
