"Smart Condom" to measure sex parameters

[CalMeacham]

Actually, a “smart cock ring”, apparently, but I guess that’s harder to put in a headline. They think it’ll go for $75

High-Tech Condom Ring Coming Out To Measure Boink Performance

In fact, the device is a ring that men can wear with a condom during sex to track a number of pertinent facts. It’s not actually available yet, but the company is taking “early bird” registrations around the world for the product, which will sell for about $75 once it’s released sometime in 2017.
The i.Con tracks speed, “average thrust velocity,” duration, skin temperature, girth, calories burned (no joke) and frequency of sessions. Most importantly for many, no doubt, will be how a wearer stacks up to the average and “best” performers — though a sexual partner will likely have an insight or two about that. Statistics are tracked via an i.Con app.
The i.Con is also supposed to be able to sense sexually transmitted diseases.

I suspect these will sell for bragging rights. And we’ll see lots of people hacking the website to up their stats.

[kayaker]

The i.Con is also supposed to be able to sense sexually transmitted diseases.

“sense” STDs?

Like a tingly spidey sense?

[burpo_the_wonder_mutt]

So, a “fuck-foot” is now going to be an actual unit (heh) of measure? I give up.

[Spiderman]

@kayaker

“sense” STDs?

Like a tingly spidey sense?

Sounds simple to me; what don’t you get about it?

[kayaker]

@Spiderman

Sounds simple to me; what don’t you get about it?

I knew you’d swoop by!

[panache45]

Can it be worn in the ass?

[Lightray]

“eight hours of juice after a single hour of being plugged in”

Damn, there’s no way I’ll be measuring up to that statistic.

[Channing_Idaho_Banks]

I just invented an app that allows the user to provide alternative results.

[Fruitbat2]

Sorry, already posted on this in the other thread.

[lieu]

“Statistics are tracked via an i.Con app.”

Ah yes, the Bone Phone.

[Trancephalic]

I put this on and it wouldn’t stop laughing.

[Northern_Piper]

@burpo_the_wonder_mutt

So, a “fuck-foot” is now going to be an actual unit (heh) of measure? I give up.

Those of us who use metric get the “fuck-metre”, which is a much more impressive unit of measurement.

[G0sp3l]

$75? Screw that.

[jasg]

@Northern_Piper

Those of us who use metric get the “fuck-metre”, which is a much more impressive unit of measurement.

This could redefine the meaning of ‘furlongs per fortnight’…