Really. I need to spend more time on the boards. There’s just too much work to do here what with moderating here, working on Teemings and trying to wade through the scads of e-mail I get every day (average is about 100.) But I still have to work, gotta worship that old folding green, gotta pay the bills and keep ATT happy to stay connected here. Oh, what’s a paperboy to dooooo?
So, I’m figuring, what the hell? If tater and beth can advertise for a sugar daddy, why can’t I have a sugar momma. I’m sure it can’t be that difficult a job. I’m a simple guy (please … restrain yourself … don’t go for the obvious joke.)
My Mom told me about a bar in Dallas where well-to-do older women go to pick out their ‘kept men’. One of her residents told her about it…she never gave me the name, however. 8^(
I think the question is how hard can you be, Euty? Not to be crude or anything, but let’s be clear on what this little venture is all about. I mean, darlin’, just what would I get in return for keeping you in the green stuff? What type of return on my investment would I get–if you get my meaning (nudge, nudge, wink, wink). I do have disposable income, and I’m very sweet, and I so believe in equality of the sexes–women should have just as much right to treat men as possessions as men do–so I have no moral obection to keeping a man. I’m just trying to remember what I’d keep him for. . . ?
Oh, I am too tired to be posting. I really just want someone to play cards with–if you play gin rummy, Euty, you may have found a sugar momma.
I don’t suppose I’d turn down hot sex, though, in case you answer evilbeth in the affirmative.
Well of course there would be hot sex. Very hot sex. One step beyond monkey. When you get right down to the basics, this is what it’s all about, isn’t it? Or gin rummy, whatever you desire. Hot gin rummy. One step beyond monkey rummy. I’d probably even rub the bunions on your feet like in that awful, awful commercial. I mean, sure, I don’t want people to think that I’m prostituting myself, but then deep down inside I might not completely be the sweet, innocent angel that everybody thinks I am.
Say it isn’t so!
Well, since there will be hot sex (one step beyond monkey–does it get hotter than that?) involved, I’d like to apply for this position. I have a couple of jobs and therefore disposable income. And hey, since I have a Sugar Daddy–I have extra disposable income! We just won’t tell him where the extra money is going. Then you can not work and stay at home working on the board…and me!
Hot gin rummy and hot sex–I think I’ve found my dream guy!! And I don’t have bunions, thank you very much. Put my application in as well. Oh, don’t worry about prostituting yourself, dear boy–I’d be your patron. It’s an age old, highly respected relationship–your work on these boards is an artistic endeavor, after all, I’d merely be helping to bring your vision to many more people. And if you were “nice” to me because of that support, well, it would just be mean-spirited of me to refuse your gestures of appreciation.
Mermaid: If I find that picture in one more thread… I’m gonna be forced to put it in my sig.
I have, ahem, experience being a sugar momma. Been doing it for five years now. I don’t have much in the way of disposable income (my disposable income is currently being spent on disposable diapers), BUT, I sure could use another man around the house.
There is another option, though. Considering the fact that you already have me, Scotti, and evilbeth as wives, and it was awfully kind of you to let us build that craft room addition on the house, perhaps we could return the favor? Maybe we could set up some sort of screening process, and select one (or more) sugar mommas for you? You know how fiercely protective of you we are, dear Euty. We only want what’s best for you.
I dunno, Persephone… maybe we should just support the man…after all, there are three of us, surely we can generate enough income to allow him to stay home with his computer?
Maybe we should have a group meeting to discuss this-I love you and Beth bunches, and I am not at all sure I have the energy to break in another “wife”!
And I am sure that he knows how to change diapers, too…maybe we can cut out the child care costs from the budget and add them to the “Euty Sugar Mom Fund”?
Hmm…Scotti has some good points. Not to mention the fact that some of us are the possessive type and don’t exactly relish sharing such a fine speciman of manhood with anyone outside the family!
Now, being “kept” by your wives might not be nearly as exciting as finding a nice Sugar Momma. But on the up-side, you can rest assured that at all times, at least one of us is a sure thing!
Excellent observation. We may seem, on the surface, to be very sweet and loving women–however, we are very, very protective and possessive of what is ours.
I do not envy the woman who attempts to take something from us–especially our Euty.
[sub]Do you think he has any idea what he has gotten himself into here? ;)[/sub]
If Euty found himself the right “sugar momma’”, it might be the wives that should worry about how long they’d live. Euty would inherit from each wife–alone, each may not be worth much (I’m only speaking financially, here), but in the aggregate, well, it could make the “sugar momma’s” burden a bit easier for a time. Give her more time to devote to allowing Euty to show his gratitute. In “sweet, innocent” ways, I’m sure. Hot monkey sex–very innocent, the epitome of innocence if you ask me. Now hot tiger sex, that’s something different. Hot monkey sex, though–innocent.
