It seems to me that you’re thinking too far ahead in your dating. Dates should be enjoyable in and of themselves and not seen as steps toward some future together in a romantic situation. If you don’t enjoy dating – if you’re more content at home, alone – then don’t date.
Well, Draelin, at least you gave it the old college try.
If he asks you out again, I suggest you tell him “Thanks but no thanks.” It’s a polite response that carries no emotional baggage. If that is too subtle for him, then you can up it to “Thanks but I’m not interested.”
Now try another date, with someone else. Ask your friends who they know. I personally suggest you not go through your coworkers a second time.
And on rereading the OP… I commend you, Draelin, for going on a second date with the guy and then, based on adequate evidence, deciding that the relationship wasn’t going to go anywhere.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with, over the course of a first couple of dates, considering whether this person is somebody you’d want to spend a lot of time with down the road. If you enjoy the date, and you get that sense, then you win! Some people date just to date, but while I’m willing to give anybody a date or two (funny, there’s been a string of nice guys I’ve met since my fiance dumped me a year ago December, they never looked at me before) if I don’t get the sense that this person is the sort I want to spend a lot of time with, or if the spark just isn’t there, then that’s it.
I would like to get married, though it isn’t the be-all and end-all of my life. That probably influences my outlook. How much money the man makes is not an issue – how he spends it might be. Looks are secondary to personality, a sense of humor is an absolute must. Color/ethnicity/country of origin doesn’t matter.
I met a really neat guy Sunday. He’s an artist! He works in metal. Now that is cool.
The real question is “Did you find any cool books at the bookstore?”
This was the MOTHER OF ALL USED BOOKSTORES. Well, maybe not. The Strand in NYC probably has that title. But there were a lot of books. I only bought two (an old favorite Nancy Drew for myself, and another book that he was going to try to buy for me, but I wouldn’t let him), but I plan on going back on Saturday with a significant portion of my paycheck.
If nothing else, I found a great bookstore out of the whole deal, discovered that I’m not a big fan of Thai food, and noticed a cute little 50’s-type malt shop I’d like to go to at a later date. 
Do it via e-mail.
You’ve given it two chances. And even if he’s picked up on the hints he’s not sure.
Not till you tell him.
If he’s a gentleman he’ll send you a thanks for the honesty note and leave it at that.
I thought I’d posted the conclusion to the saga, but I guess I didn’t! Thanks for bumping the thread and reminding me … I’m sure you were all just dying to know how it turned out. [/sarcasm]
Anyway, the day after Date #2, he emailed me and asked me out again. I agonized for a bit, then emailed him back, saying I’d had a lovely time, but it just wasn’t working for me, there was too much “date” pressure, and all sorts of nice things. He emailed back – and thanked me for being so honest.
Then a couple days later, the coworker that set us up also thanked me, for being so nice about turning him down. I can’t believe that it all worked out so well. (Okay, maybe not that well, I’m still single.)
I am living proof that advice received on the SDMB can help you get out of an ugly spot. Thanks everyone!
Woo hoo! Not as good a result as meeting the man of your dreams – but it sounds like it was a positive experience all the way around.
So, what are you now … ?
Available. 
And I’m guessing Really Not, etc. is also available.
How you doin’?