Sure has been a while! Last time I saw the boards, they were the temp boards with the hideous smilies. ::shudder::
So, I had a nervous breakdown! Honest to goodness. Ended up not leaving my house for a week around the beginning of March; stopped going to work, quit smoking cuz I was afraid to leave the house to go get some when I ran out.
Anyway, I ended up in the ER, diagnosed with panic disorder and agoraphobia. (Agoraphobia, stemming from the fact I was afraid to leave the house cuz “what if I have a panic attack and there’s no one to help me and oh my God I’d die and blah blah blah…”) Since then, I’ve been at my parents, recouping. I kind of self-imposed Internet avoidance therapy on myself… I figured part of my problem was that it was easier for me to stay inside and live in my own little virtual world rather than deal with the real world. Panic attacks 24/7 for a few weeks are a good wake up call, telling you “deal with your issues!”
So I’m ok. I quit my job, which was depressing the hell out of me, and am looking for work again. Some of you may recall I had taken a job in NYC and was moving there… that’s not happening now. It’s not the best time for that. Maybe soon I’ll be ready for that, but right now, I’m sticking local.
That’s my story. I’ve missed the boards and the friends I’ve made here, and plan to be around a bit more, now that I’ve kind of gotten a grip and am taking steps to get better. Good to see y’all again.
Rasa darling, it appears we still have that old “mind meld” thingie going on. I was driving to work this morning, about 9:45AM your time, and all of a sudden you appeared in my mind.
MyMind: Hey, I haven’t seen Rasa around lately. Where is she?
MyOtherMind: How should I know? You know we both read out of our collective mind, if YOU haven’t seen her, why should you think that I have seen her?
MM: You are such a sarcastic piece of work. I was just feeling the loss of her presence, and you don’t have to be such a witch.
MOM:Well, aren’t WE bitchy this morning? Just email the sweetie when we get home and tell her we were thinking about her and sending her warm and loving thoughts.
MM:Well, at least I get to do SOME of the fun things around here.
So, from our collective mind and heart…I miss you, honeylove, and I am glad you are doing better. You are often in my prayers.
