2.5 hours? 2.5 hours??? Did you not read IHKATAM?? We were putting the paddles to that sucker after four days without a pulse! Nonono, I can guarantee you, the only one closing the casket on this thread will be Caj…oooo…damn, that was close…
Well, after analyzing my entire posting record (number of threads killed / total number of threads posted in * 100), I’ve got a kill rate of 5.5555…%. The early killage of about 7.1% is now levelling off to a respectable 4%.
Of course, once I kill this thread it’ll throw off my calculations.
Oh, no, I’m going to kill this thread. I have to try to catch up with jweb. 
Kill this thread
Kill this thread
Take a gun and shoot it dead
It’s been years since we’ve had anybody hear
A word we’ve said
You can type
Any tripe
Regarding Sipe or Stipe or Skype
You can tell us about maple or a clever use of “papal”
Tell us all
about John Paul
Or the Queen’s Imperial Ball
It don’t matter 'cause the words have all been said
Come on and hit those keys
In any way you please
Just kill this thread
Kill this thread
Kill this thread
- apologies to Menken and Ashman
Because this is a weighty role, we share it, you and I.
Funny. Emony Dax and vetbridge both got responses to their posts. Hell, Emony got two! Oh, the irony. 
Well, Rufus Xavier, that was a masterful filk and the BEST. POST. EVAR!!!1!!1
Happy now?
Perfect.
That $500 wire transfer should be coming through…now.
I don’t think you know what the word irony means
And off we go again…
Out of 66 threads in the past two weeks, I had killed 10. Until I started to post this and got two emails notifying me of replies to two of those threads. 8! So a 12% threadicide rate.
How 'bout those Eagles?
Don’t worry, Danalan, your legacy is safe. I don’t think this’ll come anywhere near your snowball.
Not enough secret messages, for one thing…
8.9% for me, but I feel like I’m not trying hard enough.
Yeah, Nocturnal_Tick hasn’t even posted here, yet.
Once he does, all bets are off.
I’ve got five on Bevets, anyway.
My legacy? Sob!
Holy crap! I had no idea…
Yep. Imagine: thousands of posts, and all anyone ever remembers is that you started some wacky thread that you had no idea would morph into the monster it ultimately became. If only I had a legacy like that…
If we’re going to do this, we’d better do it right.
: breaks out into full zombie mode :
Poor Danalan… At least this one will be on someone elses head.
So, how long does this have to get before we start referring to it as SWYTKP?