Son of Sequential Threads, Part II, From Space

Kiddy porn in the closet. What NOT to find spring cleaning.
Young children swallowing inappropriate objects

**Happy Tax Day, y’all

Beagle gets hurt**

Did the IRS kick your dog because you didn’t pay your taxes?

Different site, but I found it amusing enough to mention. From Snopes’ What’s New section:

Tsunami Prediction (15 April 2009)
E-rumor claims a solar eclipse will touch off an earthquake and a devastating tsunami on 22 July 2009.

The Death of Common Sense (14 April 2009)
Obituary laments the passing of common sense.

**BIG bugs
Beagle gets hurt **

:eek: If they’re beating up beagles “big” is an understatement !

I’ve been eyeing these two:

**Success in the arts without a pretty package.
Britain’s Got Talent meets Les Miserables

**

A threefer:

If the Straight Dope had a theme song…
My Auditory Hallucinations
We Didn’t Start The Flamewar!

The Straight Dope’s theme song should be We Didn’t Start The Flamewar, as heard in Quasi’s auditory hallucinations.

My two-year-old daughter is reading…
The most dangerous things on Earth (according to Mom)

Newt Gingrich for POTUS in 2012
Afghan womens protests

A survey to help Jurph get his Master’s Degree
Why do people shake their legs while sitting down?

:dubious: Uhm, what are you getting your Master’s Degree in anyway?

Don’t think I’ve found one using one of my own titles before, but now we have in GQ:

**What was the use for this pond?
Male circumcision.
**

or

**Oh Midwest, what won’t you turn into a salad

Male circumcision.**

So, my two-year-old is reading . . .
Pythons escape during a flight

Hold it - there was a novelization to that movie?

“Jules had had enough. The time had come to put an end to this horror. In a rage, he stood up and declared ‘I’m SICK of these MOTHER…’”

Just my opinion, but I’d start the kid of with something a bit lighter, say Dr. Suess.

**So I found a vibrator in my hotel room
The most dangerous things on Earth(according to Mom) **

They are the devil’s playthings, child! :eek: Touch your hoo-hah with one of those and you be going straight to H-E-double hockey sticks!

**So I found a vibrator in my hotel room
Google is a pervert **

Hey; it’s just a free sex toy to help enjoy all the porn that Google helps you find. They know their customers.

**Vulcan insults
Foreign humor you just don’t get **

VERY foreign.
**Why are some right wing leaders and spokespeople toying with the idea of civil war?
Pirate Bay Found Guilty **

So, someone threatens their illegal downloading and it’s war, eh ?

**25 and never been in a relationship
So I found a vibrator in my hotel room **

And now you don’t feel so bad about it :slight_smile:

So, my two-year-old is reading . . .
Kiddy porn in the closet. What NOT to find spring cleaning.

Um… It’s age-appropriate?

** I saw my first dead body today.
“Mommy, isn’t he just dreamy?”**

The Handsomest Drowned Man In The World.

**URGENT! I need some good LIARS!
I saw my first dead body today. **

And you need to lie about this because ? I don’t like where this is going . . .
**So I found a vibrator in my hotel room
I think I can finally breathe… **

Hey, if finding a vibrator freaks you out that bad, the problem isn’t the toy.
**Those Expensive Clear Soaps-Worth It?
The most dangerous things on Earth(according to Mom) **

Huh ? MORE contaminated products from China ?!
**What’s the Smartest Thing Your Pet Ever Did?
A time-traveling, hijacked MMP **

Wow, I don’t even know what that IS !

**New tabbeh kitteh
OMG! Why are tbey trying to give me a stroke! **

It’s what people do, kitty. On account of you being cute and fluffy and all.