So we’re watching TV last night and out of nowhere my husband asks me if he is my soulmate. I don’t really know, I’ve never given it much thought. I love him enough to put up with his crap, but I don’t think that makes him my soulmate.
Does anyone believe in soulmates ?
How would you know if you’ve found your soulmate ?
How do you define a soulmate ?
No, I don’t believe in them (I have a very hard time saying the word, let alone typing it). Some people believe in them. Some people also believe in the yeti, loch ness monster, and world peace.
I assume that if one did believe in them, they would “… just know…”. Much the same way pet owners say their cat can understand them when they recite Shakespeare.
As far as a definition is concerned, I’m drastically opposed to people tossing the term around like it’s synonymous with love, so I can’t use love as a basis for comparison. I would define them as:
“Two or more people, taken with the notion that the word love is far too common to describe the mutual attraction they feel, deciding to steal some “new-age/hippie” slang in a vain attempt to make their feelings meaningful.”
Lets get over it folks and just call it the same thing as everyone else… love.
I think people have latched on to the term “souldmate” because the word “love” is thrown around with such abandon that people can’t believe it any more.
I don’t tell people I love them unless I DO…and I don’t mean a generic “love thy neighbor” love, either.
My husband is my soulmate. However, I know I have more of them out there. I don’t think each person has one soulto whom they cleave forever, world without end, amen; I think everyone has SEVERAL people with whom they could form that kind of a close bond, and I think it’s a deep shame that we’re not allowed to try to bond with more than one person, actually.
Then again, I’m a freak.
Welcome to the boards Grief! Glad to see you observed the standard six month wait between registering and posting. 
As far as soulmates, you only get out of a relationship what you bring to it. If you feel you’ve found your soulmate two weeks after meeting them, my guess is that’s either hormones or neediness talking. I see a soulmate as someone that complements you well, someone who brings out the best in you, and vice-versa. This takes time. If after being together a while you find that you are a better person for it, then you’ve probably found a soulmate.
Notice I said “a” soulmate, not “your” soulmate. I truly believe that humans are meant to form relationships. Given enough time and the right surroundings, I think you can find a soulmate almost anywhere. I don’t believe that there is only one perfect being for you and that if never meet them you will never be happy.
Forget about the religious implecations of that word, for me a soulmate is just someone who’s personality compliments your own really well. Like the best friend you ever had, someone it’s hard for you to imagine that you’ll ever find anybody you could like or care for more and they fill the same way about you.
I’ll just point out for the record I’ve never found a soulmate so I can’t attest to their existence.
I’ve found the whole “soulmate” thing to be over-used by co-dependent people in destructive relationships; “Sure, he beats my mom, killed my cat, and lives off of my salery, but I can’t leave him! He’s my soulmate, so I’ll never ever be loved by anyone else ever again!! He’s The One and Only.”
Bah. There are many people out there that would be right of any individual-people you could fall in love with. What matters is hte person oyu did fall in love with, and that is plenty special without dressing it up with the idea that this happiness is the only possible happiness out there.
OTOH. a husband who is bringing this up out of the blue may welll be feeling unloved or taken for granted or something, so it might be a gentle hint to pay him a bit more attention than usual.
Soulmates?
Sure, I think I even have several. Its a goal, you see, to create deep connection with people. I have a friend that we can spend four hours talking about deeply important issues, totally understand each other, and say aloud a total of six words between the two of us. Its lovely, its heart rending, its powerful…
And currently, while I know of several soulmates, my SO is not one of them. We might get there, but then again it might take all the fun out of it. Right now, my SO and I are at the level of “complimenting each other well”. And we’re quite happy with it.
“Soulmate” isn’t a one and only proposition for me. Its almost more of a state, I just know I can find it fairly quickly with a few people.
What Manda Jo said.
I thought I had found my soulmate - let me tell you, it’s a dangerous thing! He left me broken hearted without a trace and now I am resigned to finding that person again.
I do believe you can become so emotionally/physically wrapped up in someone it’s overwhelming… it’s really a state of mind and how that person makes you feel instead of the actual person. It’s almost a euphoric feeling…