Isn’t that special?
Good evening. I’m Chevy Chase, and you’re not.
Never mind.
There. That wasn’t so good, was it?
Jane, you ignorant slut!
Generalissimo Francisco Franco is still dead.
Candygram!
Hey, hey, hey, calm down, you two. New Shimmer is both a floor wax and a dessert topping!
We’re from France.
Let us consume mass quantities.
Come with us now … from the bubbling tarpits to the sulfurous wasteland … from the rotting forest to the stagnant mud flats … to the long lost Land of Gorch!
C. I. L. L.
My landlord.
We have been in this business a long time. With our experience, we’re gonna have ideas for change combinations that probably haven’t occurred to you. If you have a $50 bill, we can give you fifty singles. We can give you forty-nine singles and ten dimes. We can give you twenty-five twos. Come talk to us. We are not going to give you change that you don’t want. If you come to us with a hundred-dollar bill, we’re not going to give you two-thousand nickels - unless that meets your particular change needs.
Robots are everywhere and they eat old people’s medicine for fuel.
Talk amongst yourselves
He’s a mighty decent guy, I must say.
Good night and have a pleasant tomorrow!
Before I begin, I want to tell you a little about myself, so you’ll know where I’m coming from. First off, I am 35 years old… I am thrice divorced… and I live in a van down by the river!
“I am not like Sheldon. I am not a scientist. I do not speak Klingon. I do have a male roommate, but I assure you it is a vastly different arrangement.”
And you are…?
But enough talk, let’s get right to tonight’s art classics.
Now, the first one here is called Venus of Irbino, and it was painted in 1538 by a guy in Venice. And, this is for real, his name is spelled T-I-T-I-A-N. Titian! Honest to God!