Gloria, where’s my good underwear?
Men hang on to underwear until… until each individual underwear molecule is so strained it can barely retain the properties of a solid. It actually becomes underwear vapor. W- We don’t even throw it out, we just open a window and it goes out like dandelion spoors. That’s how men throw out underwear we just go… [blows] and it’s gone. That’s it. It’s just…
I saw it in the window and I couldn’t resist.
Lois, who else knocks on your third floor window?
(knock-knock-knock) Penny! (knock-knock-knock) Penny! (knock-knock-knock) Penny!
[everybody is hitting up Beaver to vote for them for Junior Fire Chief when Penny “accidentally” bumps into him in the hallway] Why, Beaver Cleaver, it’s *you*. Why, you’re getting so big and tall that I didn’t recognize you!
The whole world is short!
Short jokes? Really? You’re like a quarter of an inch taller than me.
How come there’s guys like Lumpy, who pick on littler guys?
Why don’t I have to stand in line to bully you?
I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and doggone it, people like me.
Geez, Tina, what are you, Narcy Narc and the Narcy Bunch?
Oh, I see! A bunch of stuff gets bent, so it must be the robot designed for bending!
- Hello, random patient. You have cancer. Press 1 for a reassuring pep talk. Press 2 to give up. You pressed 1 for a reassuring pep talk. You are strong. You can beat this. Beat this, beat this, beat this, beat this. [explodes]
- Stupid robot - Ow
- Internet’s been down for half an hour.
- Also Sheldon might be a robot.
Is Malcolm a robot?
I swear on my mother’s rechargable batteries.
My battery is going dead, my circuits have shorted, and my cooling system has broken down.
Yeah, see, that’s the code red! It’s kind of like a jack in the box. No one knows exactly when, but at some point, something way worse than a puppet is gonna pop out of that box.
Oh, yes, I laughed too when I first heard it. So, later, I got up and I ran down that mountain and I found that the rocks weren’t grey at all. They were red, brown, purple and gold. And those pathetic little patches of sludgy snow, they were shining white. Shining white in the sunlight. You still frightened, Jo?