The mean Indian lady tried to make me eat lamb.
No soup for you!
“Have you noticed that every place has that tip jar on the counter? What is the service that this tip is for, anyway? I mean, isn’t the man basically just turning around? Isn’t that really all it is? I think we’re tipping people now just for the absence of outright hostility.”
- Gee a whole nickel. Thanks a lot boy.
- What’s the matter mister? Don’t they pay you for driving your cab around?
- Sure, I get paid.
- Then how come you wanna take free money away from a kid?
Barney I’d offer you some dough only I know you’re too proud to take it.
Barney, divorce is like a horse with a broken leg. You can shoot the horse, but that don’t fix the leg.
I have three kids and no money. Why can’t I have no kids and three money?"
I’m not going to spend my hard earned money so you and your buddy can sit around drinking beer all day. In, fact I already bought something more important.
I was thinking along the lines of “no TV and no beer make Homer something something.”
Here’s to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.”
And because it’s odorless, why, it’ll be our little secret!
] You don’t know how to drink. Your whole generation, you drink for the wrong reasons. My generation, we drink because it’s good, because it feels better than unbuttoning your collar, because we deserve it. We drink because it’s what men do.
A little touched, or so we’re told
Killed his wife ‘cause she had a cold
Might as well, she was gettin’ old!
Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad, Psycho Dad!
“It’s a cold. It’ll get better.”
- When will the pain go away?
- Never.
Oh, the pain, the pain…
Walk it off. And remember, the next time stretch before you ovulate.
It was really nice to do a walk that wasn’t of shame, but still.
Maybe, just once, someone will call me ‘sir’ without adding, ‘you’re making a scene.’
Ghyme? What’s a ghyme?