Well, I do know one joke. There was this mollusk, and he walks up to this sea cucumber. Normally, they don’t talk, sea cucumbers, but in a joke everyone talks. So the sea mollusk says to the cucumber…
I’d give real money if he’d shut up.
Your destiny can be your doom.
Fate, it seems, is not without a sense of irony.
[URL=“The Matrix (1999) - Quotes - IMDb”]
Y’know, people are always putting New Jersey down. None of my friends can believe I live here. But that’s because they don’t get it: I’m living in a state of irony.
All right! You have all completed the written exam. However, you must now pass the obstacle course to be admitted into the training program. And remember- survive this and you are on front lines of keeping New Jersey safe!
Noah was a drunk, look what he accomplished. And no one’s asking you to build an ark. All you’ve got to do is go to New Jersey.
“They were sent to Hell?”
“Worse. Wisconsin.”
And somewhere along the line, Jim picked up a protégé, a cute political kid from Wisconsin,
Snowhill, get your Wisconsin ass back in the barracks.
Wrong! I’m fucking running the Green Bay Packers!
Is this your team, or is it your daddy’s team?
Daddy does oil. And all that that implies.
You take a look at her. Cause once you step on that bus you aint got your mama no more. You got your brothers on the team and you got your daddy.
You know who your daddy is, doncha? Gary, if you want to play on this football team, you answer me when I ask you who is your daddy? Who’s your daddy, Gary? Who’s your daddy?
My father and I don’t get along, he doesn’t approve of my lifestyle and, needless to say, I don’t approve of his. Still, I hardly wish to make my father’s embezzlement a police matter, so I’m proposing that you try to recover the money from the people you delivered it to.
What’s a six-letter word meaning “embezzlement”?
What do you want me to do? Draw you a picture? Spell it out? Don’t ever ask me! Long as you live, don’t ever ask me more.
If my answers frighten you, Vincent, perhaps you should cease asking scary questions.
If my life has a single point, it’s this- I have learned to be unafraid of death but never to be unafraid of failure.
Yes. Yes! To Obi-Wan, you listen!