I have existed from the morning of the world and I shall exist until the last star falls from the night. Although I have taken the form of Gaius Caligula, I am all men as I am no man and therefore I am a God.
God exists, and he is American.
What’s good for General Bullmoose is what’s good for the U.S.A.
I believe in America.
Gentlemen, congratulations. You’re everything we’ve come to expect from years of government training.
Oh, you… you poor dumb son of a bitch. You’ve done more damage than you know.
Huh? I am not a bum. I’m a jerk. I once had wealth, power, and the love of a beautiful woman. Now I only have two things: my friends, and… uh… my thermos. Huh? My story? Okay. It was never easy for me. I was born a poor black child. I remember the days, sittin’ on the porch with my family, singin’ and dancin’ down in Mississippi…
Oh! He’s my oldest friend. But he’s not a nice man. He… he’s gotten to be a very kinky personality.
It’s there all the time, driving me out to wander the streets, following me, silently, but I can feel it there. It’s me, pursuing myself! I want to escape, to escape from myself! But it’s impossible. I can’t escape, I have to obey it. I have to run, run… endless streets. I want to escape, to get away! And I’m pursued by ghosts. Ghosts of mothers and of those children… they never leave me. They are always there… always, always, always!, except when I do it, when I… Then I can’t remember anything. And afterwards I see those posters and read what I’ve done, and read, and read… did I do that? But I can’t remember anything about it! But who will believe me? Who knows what it’s like to be me? How I’m forced to act… how I must, must… don’t want to, must! Don’t want to, but must! And then a voice screams! I can’t bear to hear it! I can’t go on! I can’t… I can’t…
How do you do, old sport? I’m Gatsby.
It’s like this: you wake and watch TV, get in your car and listen to the radio you go to your little jobs or little school, but you don’t hear about that on the 6 o’clock news, why? 'Cause nothing is really happening, and you go home and watch some more TV and maybe it’s a fun night and you go out and watch a movie. I mean it’s got so bad that half the people on TV, inside the TV, they’re watching TV. What are these people watching, people like me?
Our polls indicate people like ventriloquists and jugglers.
If we don’t come down hard on these clowns, we are going to be up to our balls in jugglers!
I’m a sad clown. I’m not funny.
nm
That’s me. The happy idiot. A million laughs.
Buck up - never say die. We’ll get along.
Thank you, your honor. With God’s help I’ll conquer this terrible affliction.
He’s dead, Jim.
Dead. In the gutter dead.