The law school at my university is hosting an evening of speed dating. For those of you not familiar with this, I will, over the course of the evening, have 10 five-minute “dates” with different women who have been selected using some rather cheesy matchup survey. If two of us mark down on a sheet that we’re interested in “romance” with the other, our email addresses are exchanged. If one of us marks down “friendship” and the other “romance” or “friendship”, it’s the same deal, but we’re told that it’s for friendship (I had not heard of this option before.)
I have never done this before. I have not been on a date in two years. I have never gone on a date with someone I did not already know. Do any of you have some pointers for me? I really have no idea what I’m doing.
I think the scariest part of the evening is going to be the mingling that will occur between “dates”. They only have so many booths for dates, so this will be spread out over a few hours. I’ve never been good with these sorts of situations.
Outgoing and friendly. In between dates, mingle, smile, shake hands and introduce yourself. Giving them the impression that you’re having a good time and glad you’re there.
Act like it is an opportunity to meet new people, not needing to find your soul mate.
I would suggest thinking in advance of a couple of topics that you could bring up in case the conversation lulls. Try to be alert (sleep good the night before), well dressed, and in the best mood you can muster. Treat it like a kids game and enjoy yourself. Your natural relaxed manner will win over more ladies than a forced smile.
Is this…in aid of the Law School, or somebody’s psych thesis, or what? Are you obligated to go through with this? I think it could be a hoot, but I just wonder how you’re involved.
Better to be confident than a confidant. But listening doesn’t hurt either.
First and foremost, have a good time. Being desperate, nervous, or trying too hard is going to be a turn-off. This is an opportunity for women to meet you, not your only chance to ever hook up with someone.
Be interesting, but more importantly be interested. Ask questions. When someone says “I spent the summer in Paris” it isn’t necessarily time to tell them all about your travels, it’s time to ask them “What did you enjoy most about it?” or somesuch.
Think of a few things before hand to ask about. With only 10 minutes, you want to skip the “So, um, nice weather” part of the conversation.
Don’t be afraid to drop a compliment or two. A feminist friend of mine told me “Say nice things about how they look. It’s sad but true, women eat this up.”
And, finally, don’t take any advice from me, I’m terrible at dating.
I see that’s “Doctor”, short for “Doctor o’ Lovin’”. I’ll keep it in mind .
The money is going to some thing or another, but I don’t remember. I’m not in the law school. They’re just organizing it. Our “dates” are supposed to be w/people not in our school (arts & sciences in my case.)
I’ll post when I get back. Gotta start primping and steeling myself.
I survived. It was fun. I’d be willing to do it again. It was a little frustrating because five minutes really isn’t enough time to figure out if I like someone or not. There were not any fireworks. Not even any sparks. We’ll see what the results are. I shall report back when I know.
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Good Luck.