How 'bout IM? That’s what we use; it’s quiet and fast, doesn’t require a whole conversation. Though I guess that’s what she wants…
My husband is a firefighter, working 24 hour shifts. I’m retired. I like talking to him, but I don’t call during the day. He calls me when things are slow. It works out well, except when he doesn’t call at all. Then I watch the local news channel to be sure he isn’t dead.
I agree with those saying you should call her, when time permits. If you’re consistant, she will trust you to comunicate with her, and stop being a nudge.
I prefer the spellings “nudzh or noodge”.
Thanks, I knew my spelling wasn’t right, but I had no clue…
This is so totally foreign to my experience that it amazes me. Growing up, my mother NEVER called my father at work unless one of us kids had lost a leg or something. Work was for work. Besides, he worked at a railroad repair yard and wasn’t actually beside a phone most of the day, which meant that he had to be called into the office if someone called him, which meant that his bosses knew he was on the phone every time he was, so we did. not. call. him. at. work. EVER.
Even now, I never talk to supervenusfreak on the phone while I’m at work. It’s unprofessional, imo, to talk to your spouse/SO during the work day unless it’s an emergency. Breaks and lunches, yes. Not when you’re on the clock.
Same situation as my first hubby. He worked construction and if I needed to reach him, I had to go through a few people and it’d take awhile for him to get to a phone. The only time I called him at work, ever, in 20 years, was when his dad died.
I don’t remember my mom ever calling my stepdad at work either. His boss would have had a fit, and my stepdad would have wanted to deduct the time from his paycheck. Plus, there wasn’t anything mom couldn’t handle. 
Just because we can be connected all the time, doesn’t mean it’s a good thing. The OP proves that.
I drink beer with friends about once a month, for a couple hours, not an all-nighter. One friend always gets at least one phone call from a teenage daughter, never an emergency, not even close. It’s annoying. Leave mommy alone. Let her drink a beer in peace, for pete’s sake.
And that, folks, is a good example of why you shouldn’t post when you’re tired.* Somewhere along the way, coherency disappears.
Do not get into the details. That’s what I was trying to say. Don’t respond to anything that’s not a report of death, burning, or bleeding. Just respond, “I’m sorry, I can’t talk right now, I’ll call you back later.” click. Then call her back when you have a few minutes to visit in a more private place. Like on your cell outside the office.
*Also, note to self: Preview is my friend. Preview is my friend.
I’m surprised that I had to read over 40 posts to reach one that actually didn’t have spouses, etc. calling their S/O at work. I can count on one hand the number of times my wife has called me at workin 22 years of marriage. Except for one time, to tell me she had gotten the job she applied for, they were all emergencies. An adult should be able to go 8 hours or so without speaking to their spouse. IMHO.
I see him plenty. I rarely call him at work, unless, like someone else said, someone’s leg is missing. Ok, occassionally for less vital things. But that’s what e-mail is for.
Wow, when you list your location as “North end of I-5,” you really mean the north END!
Some guy left multiple messages over a couple months since spring. “Hello, I’ll have to meet you at the prison.” “Hello, I need you to meet me at the emergency room.” One message was personal medical information. He left messages several minutes long. He never identified himself or the person’s name he thought he was talking to. I would think not showing up at the prison or emergence room would have made them question what was going on.
Somebody moved into the same city as our family that had the same first and last name as my father. The man got divorced and ran around with many loose women. The many seedy women called our house at all hours of the day or night. My mother would get some bitch on the other end, asking for this person by nickname. The bar bitch s would immediately start in on “Who the Hell are you?” and “What are you doing at his house?”. She’d tell them that they had the wrong number and hang up. They would call back and still want a confrontation. The thing is the ass would sometimes give our number to these women and he was unlisted. He got his lay and didn’t want to talk with them again. He was always causing problems for our family, because his wife would pass bad checks. The name on the store’s bad checks list matched my father’s. We’d go in to shop and after tallying up the cart of groceries the new employees would loudly tell her she was on the list for passing bad checks, and call over the manager. I wish their was a clear law they could have used against him, it was a form of identity theft, when he gave out our information instead of his to maliciously.
The house phone was my father’s work number too.
Can anyone explain why there is a need to call the spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend/whatever on a regular basis during the work day? Is it really that hard to go 8 or 10 hours without?
I’m not talking about emergencies or really important things that can’t wait like ‘I need you to meet me at the hospital because I have just broken my leg and the ambulance is taking me.’
I mean calling to just chat during work. Why? Isn’t that what the time after work is for?
Well, thanks for all the advice and suggestions. Upon reflection, I think I’ll be telling her that all personal calls will go to voice mail from now on. Then I’ll simply just listen to the messages and only call back if a leg is indeed missing.
My point exactly catsix; you can’t wait another 6 hours to tell me this?
Well, I call Papa T. (or he calls me) during the day, usually midday, to both give him a breather talking to someone who’s not coming to him with a problem, which is what most of his work consists of, and also to make sure he remembers to eat, which he needs to since he’s diabetic but he gets so busy he forgets. If he’s not available, he either lets it go to voicemail or answers with, “Can I call you back?” which he does to a lot of people besides me, so it’s not a big issue. But there have been a lot of days when he really appreciated me calling with the reminder to eat, so it’s part of my daily routine.
Sometimes it’s not just to bug the person.
Fortunately for my SO, when he’s working he’s nowhere near a phone. Sometimes it’s frustrating, if there really IS something important I need to tell him, but so far, the world has not stopped turning.
OTOH, he tends to call me at work (we don’t always work the same hours), sometimes with less than important things, for example, to “check in.” I appreciate the calls, because sometimes he gets off from work early and goes on a computer call, or goes golfing or something and ends up strolling in at 8 p.m. It’s nice to have a heads up so I’m not wondering where the hell he is.
But yeah, if he was just calling me to chat, that would annoy me greatly. Mostly because I am NEVER alone at work, so any conversation will be overheard by at least 3 or 4 people.
This has been sort of an issue with a woman I’ve been dating for about a year. For the longest time she would call me multiple times a day, whether I was working or not. If I didn’t answer after multiple calls she would text message me to call her!
We had it out over this a few times. It’s slacked off a bit, but she still calls me a fair amount for no real reason. Anymore I’ve gotten used to it. It’s sort of nice to know someone is thinking of you. I’d probably miss it if she ever stopped.
I don’t call my husband from work since it’s a long distance call and that’s frowned upon if it’s not work related. If I need to reach him, I go out to my car and use my cell. He’ll do the same to call me. I can usually tell by his tone of voice if he’s just taking a break and calling to say hi, and if I’m busy, I just say “Can you call me back?” and he knows that I’m occupied.
It works for us.
I e-mail the wife more than taok during the day. Sometimes trivial stuff, somethimes we fight by e-mail, sometimes it’s just the shopping list being passed back and forth. If there’s something we actually have to talk at length about then she’ll either call my cell or I’ll call her, but it’s seldom more than once a day.
Exactly. I’m not married, but I cannot imagine calling a spouse or boyfriend (or having them call me) even once a day, much less two or three times. You friggin’ live with the person, and you can’t go 8-9 hours without talking to them? It blows my mind.
Of course, this might be one reason why I’m not married.