Stop Sending Me Chain Letters! I Will NOT Forward Them On To 20 People, Dickhead!

Send this to 20 people and you will have good luck…if you break the chain, you will BURN IN HELL!

Well, you know what? FUCK YOU!

How STUPID are you that you think clogging up my email with crap about some hocus pocus is going to ruin my life. And do you think sending this to me will endear yourself?

Today I deleted yet another crappo “…or else you will have bad luck for the rest of your life if you don’t forward this on” emails today, and tonight I won $1,011 on a Royal Flush at my local casino.

Aside from that, here is my comment:

For every idiot who sends me some “send this to support the troups/send this to get good luck/send this or you will die…” You are, and will forever remain, an idiot.

Keep it up, and you might be surprised to get on the “get viagra free” list when I enter your name and email!

Do what I do and forward the chain message 20 times back to the person who sent it.

Then send them a 21st message telling them that they now need to forward the message 400 times (20 times 20) or burn in hell 20 times and, if they know what’s good for them, they will not include you on their pestering list.

Works every time. :stuck_out_tongue:

You must have different friends than I do. I have a collection of chain letters from the last 30 years, and none of the senders supplied their name or return address.

It’s my theory that they are ashamed to admit what they have done, but too afraid to not do it. cf. Pascal’s Wager.

It sounds like these are e-mail chains, so, the sender’s address is right there to reply to.

I always see people who send those things as being kind of selfish. Say this person really did save themselves from hell; it’s good for them, but they just condemned at least nineteen out of twenty of their friends/family to hell. It’s kind of like “Save me!! Take everyone I know instead!!”. Now that’s selfish!!

I get that junk all the time too. I hate it. I hate how pissy people get when I tell them not to send me any more. I will just hope they get a giant zit in their forehead. You know, the big white ones with a core that look like an eye. If it hurts. even better.

DMark, you’re missing out on all the fun!

Send out the letters–just… modify them a bit. :wink:

[hijack]

Hey, Kythereia, you planning to subscribe? I like your style! And good sense, as revealed here, for example. Please do stick around.

Oh, and assuming you will, here’s a pre-emptive “Welcome to the Straight Dope!”

[/hijack]

Everybody has a few friends that are in that group. The part that amazes me is that these are otherwise intelligent people, but if you send them an email on how to make a delicious stew using week-old dead rat sphincters with instructions to pass it on to 10 other people…DING! Pavlov would be proud. :rolleyes:

The really bad part is one of these people is a friend of my Dad, who still doesn’t get the concept of stripping headers and looking to see if the sender sent it to me, so I get the same dollop of festering ooze twice. :smack:

Lately I’ve been returning the urban legend chain mails as a “Reply to All” with the Snopes link. I can’t believe my friends are so gullible.

Silly me. I remember when chain letters were delivered to my mailbox on the wooden post, not on the computer. By an official, uniformed, U.S. government agent, no less.

Danceswithcats and Ruby, there must be something about incoming (e)mail that when delivered with the line “send this to everyone you know!!!” makes people believe they should do it. Right away, or the sky will fall.

I send them the snopes link, too, but they don’t learn. They just remove me from their spam list.

[hijack of the hijack]

116 posts in 2 days!? He/she has too much invested to quit.

[/hijack of the hijack]

Welcome Kythereia

Hey, at least that gives you a break from the crud.

I’ve pretty much broken all my emailing friends of forwarding stuff. Not hard to do when most of them loathe it as much as I do.

Oh, crap, is Kythereia out to beat my post/day count? The nerve! :stuck_out_tongue: :smiley:

Your comment reminded me of a message sent to one friend with the attached link from snopes. She replied in a huffy manner that she didn’t have time to check the accuracy of things in her mailbox.

Ah, I understand-distribution trumps factuality.

A girl I was corresponding with on match.com kept sending me kountry-kitschy glurgey foo-foo “inspirational women” chain mail letters, along with kilobytes of unstripped headers.

She stood me up for the date we were supposed to have last week. When I got home, I sent her an e-mail telling her to remove me from her glurge list. Probably for the best; I imagine her house is filled with collections of Beanie Babies, has pink painted walls with wallpaper borders showing duckies, fluffy kittens or moo-cows, and frilly doilies on every flat horizontal surface. Bitch.

So, being naturally intrigued, I check out your posts-per-day count (8 plus). Not too bad, especially if a couple of the posts here and there are “whatever” or “right-on” posts. But isn’t there a some kind of quantity-quality inverse law? Can’t you only saturate a sponge so much that it starts giving you diminishing returns?

So as not to hijack: Yeah, chain letters suck. I would give you a personal experience; but I don’t have one.

I have had friends who are surgeons and PhD’s forward the ‘internet petitions’ to stop whatever atrocity was going on that Something Had To Be Done.

I send them the snopes link to think that it will stop such nonsense and educate them.

No such luck.

Smart people believe the dumb things too.

One particularly bad glurge fangirl was an old female friend of mine that just forwarded every peice of email diaherrea to 100 of her friends. I would send the snopes link to all those emails with the header of “Kristin is an idiot” . Eventually, she took me off her list. She is an idiot, too.
Stupid people beleive the dumb things as well.

Dopers, we are outnumbered and surrounded. It’s time to start flingin’ poo.

Well, that depends on the size and quality of the sponge, eh? :dubious:

My post/day count used to be higher, till I discovered Fathom and pretty much abandoned MPSIMS here. I’ve gotten addicted to a role-playing mafia game there, and am spending way too much time writing mini-episodes for my characters to keep up my old Dope rate.

Hey, I could send your email addy to people I know who are into that sort of thing. :smiley:

DMark, is your email listed? Because I could send you something that’d bring you great luck if you’ll just e-mai…

I was kicked off of a mailing list once because I kept pointing people to Snopes every time we got the “Little Billy is dying of a papercut!” e-mails.