While being completely unable to think of an appropriate birthday present/gesture for the guy I’ve been dating for a couple of months, I thought it was a great opportunity to ask y’all what your idea of a perfect date would be. When I started to think of smaller (because of the length of time we’ve been dating) gestures I could do or gifts I could get, I realized that everything I thought of was lady romantic and not so much guy romantic. Fill me in guys! Any suggestions are welcome.
I would need to know more about your guy. For me, a special date would be a picnic in some remote nature spot. Top of a mountain with a beautiful view, canoe ride down the river, something like that. That might not fit in your time frame though. Were you thinking of a date lasting a few hours in the evening?
Do you know any guys? The answer is always sex. For perfect, it would include sex with your sister too.
It would probably be more of an evening thing. Anything other than that couldn’t fall on his birthday due to our schedules, but that might be ok too. As for more about him: there aren’t any mountains nearby unfortunately, but we’ve gone on stargazing dates, picnic dates and walks, movies, etc. He seems to enjoy all of those, but I wanted to do something a bit more special so maybe getting a thoughtful gift in addition would be best? I don’t want to do too much in case he’s not feeling like we’re at that point yet. Any other questions, please ask.
Tripolar: really? Sex happens all the time anyway, so nothing special required?
Sex.
River: What are his interests?
Also, you say “guy romantic”; I’m not sure there is any such thing. Men usually don’t think in terms of them liking something because it’s romantic.
You might want to just ask him. Very few men have been disappointed knowing something in advance because “I wanted it to be a surprise!”.
A few answer elements: the type of sex he prefers several times, food, a play activity (e.g.:video games, sports, pool, monster trucks), all mixed together if possible. Remember George Costanza’s food+sex+TV. Replace “TV” with his particular interest.
A date which in no way shape or form feels like or resembles what usually passes for a “date.”
Really. A good date idea might involve going to a new and interesting place, and then having sex there. I mean do whatever you want to do for your date, just make sure there is sex involved or else it’s not going to be all that enticing to him.
Can’t go wrong with a steak and a blowjob.
As one of the more conservative members of the SDMB, I can still affirm that “sex” is an appropriate answer.
I’m assuming that “a couple of months” would mean that you’re already sexually active (and if not, it’s a good time to start). So sex in and of itself may no longer be a surprise, but indeed an expectation. In that case, do your best to have surprise sex in some out of the ordinary circumstance.
A walk in some beautiful natural area to watch the sunset. Fancy dinner out, then head home for sexytime.
Wow. All of you guys saying sex…I feel bad for you. When you have sex several times per week and instigate a good third or more of the acts, well, sex just isn’t special or a reward. It’s like food or medicine - it’s essential.
For us it’s dinner at a restaurant he loves (we have overlapping lists but at the top ours differ) and then something “fun” on another day. Maybe it’s an arcade, maybe it’s shooting pool, maybe it’s go-kart racing or mini-golf or playing Stratego.
Does he like videogames? Boardgames? Arcades? Physical stuff - bike rides at a new trail? A hike? New doo-dad for his liquor collection? The theater - if you’re young, there may be discounted tickets.
The thing with “special” is that you’re gambling that he may hate it. Take a favorite, rare activity that he likes and do it with him.
((When you’ve been together for a long time, let him play videogames all day in his boxers while you clean his place, then force him to shower and shove him out the door to have a few beers with his best friends. Drive him to the bar. Pick him up at the bar, too, looking cute and smiling as though it’s the only thing you’ve wanted to do all day. When you’ve been together for a really really long time, take phone calls from his mother so he doesn’t have to talk to her and invent excuses for the two of you as to why you can’t go to the vegan brunch place with your other coupled friends.))
ETA: I am not a man, I’m a lady but my SO is a real nerd/geek who would fit right. He actually has asked me to ask the SD things for him at times.
You’re not even a guy, yet you presume to shower pity upon guys for their inferior date preferences? :rolleyes:
I think a night in a nice hotel room would be called for, if you can afford it. King bed, spa bathtub, scented oils+back massage, buy yourself a nice piece of lingerie (maybe something that you keep on during sex, like crotchless hose), and try to think of something sexual that you guys haven’t done yet (blindfold+ice cube? underwater oral?).
The guys I’ve been with and spoken to don’t generally get into “stuff” as much as “doing stuff.” They like stuff, sure, but doing stuff is more memorable. I guarantee this date would be more memorable than giving him a watch or a book he’s been wanting.
You’re a single woman, lacking in a nerdy SO, participating in a thread requesting advice from guys? That makes sense…how?
For the record, that sounds like a date a chick would like.
Ditto, but I will add to that – go out for Sushi and Sake…then go for a walk …hold hands…then back to your place or his —take a shower together and lather each other up…then a bit of vino and music, and then … 
Why HOT SEX, of course!
rach, the hotel room is only necessary if it makes you less inhibited. Otherwise this is dead on.
And you should be calling out Lindsay in that forum where we don’t have to mince words.
BTW: How you doin’?
I feel bad that you haven’t yet figured out that your boyfriend’s idea of a perfect date is just fantastic sex.
I don’t think I would ever really apply an adjective such as “perfect” to a date. They’d just be classified as “successful” and “unsuccessful.” I wouldn’t say sex is necessary for success, but yeah, it probably helps.
Steakhouse + Show + Drinks is a decent trifecta.
[quote=“Cyberhwk, post:18, topic:586508”]
I don’t think I would ever really apply an adjective such as “perfect” to a date. They’d just be classified as “successful” and “unsuccessful.” I wouldn’t say sex is necessary for success, but yeah, it probably helps.
I agree, when one sets their expectations out for “perfect” it can lead to disappointment. Sex is most definitely not necessary for a good date, but if you are into each other, and you enjoy being intimate, it can only make the date that much sweeter.
I’m going to buck the general “macho” trend and say that yes, some guys do like romance - in addition to the sex.
My perfect date was the second date with my girlfriend, and occurred last year.
We were staying by the sea, and in the morning we went for a crazy long walk along the shore, found a ferry and took it spontaneously, ended up at a crab shack where we had the best crab salad sandwiches either of us had ever eaten. We went back to the house where I cooked her a dinner that she loved, with a modicum of wine. Then we sat together in silence listening to some awesome music and ended up in the garden under a blanket, gazing at the stars together. Then I kissed her and we went to bed for the first time and had a few hours of wonderful sex.
The trick to it all was the escalating sexual tension. I was walking around with a boner half the day. I guess the only thing that would have made it better would have been a blow job too.