No, not the sexually voracious London club proprietor. It’s me I’m talking about.

Last Christmas, Mrs Schadenfreude’s parents were kind enough
to purchase for me, amongst other things, a device for holding a ball of string and feeding out the end through a suitably sized hole.

I was touched, of course, but also mystified. I am not known for excessive use of string. Occasionally I tie up Mrs Schadenfreude, just for amusement, and perform various experiments on her person, but I am always careful to save the string for similar and subsequent occasions. This is our Special String and I am not prepared to comment on the matter any further.

So it was a bit of a surprise to receive my own personal String System for Christmas, but nothing to really worry about.

Yesterday Mrs Schadenfreude meets a friend who she doesn’t see for a year or more. They exchange Christmas presents for last year. Mrs S. returns home, and what is in her bag but a gift for me. And what is the gift but a string bag, this being a bag you put string in and feed out through a string-size hole. Naturally the bag is preloaded with string.

Can anyone tell me what is going on?

Damn! That’s what I was going to get you!

You just have yourself a strang thang, sonny. Wouldn’t a shrink just have a ball with you :smiley: