It’s waaaaaay too early to get up a really good head of steam for laughter. The most you’re gonna get out of ME right now is a rather sickly grin - follow it and you’ll see a disarrayed lock of hair falling on a sheet-wrinkle-induced temporarily-tattooed shoulder, attached to which is an arm holding out an empty cup of coffee. If you go back to that sickly grin, you’ll note the pleading look in my eyes, as they seem to silently appeal to you:
“Please don’t expect Hama to be clever right now…”
This is also where I try to figure out how I can hold an empty cup of coffee. If it’s empty - there’s nothing in it - so it can’t be a cup of coffee. I suppose I’m just pleadingly holding out an empty coffee cup.
NOW do you people see why I gave up on flirting? I can’t even sort out a stupid coffee cup, and I’m somehow supposed to keep track of hands, fingers, lips, tongues, torrid glances and frantic fumblings? I’ll be lucky if I can remember yer damned GENDER.
Given the appropriate chance. I’d flirt with Medea’s Child in a second. I’ve been hooked on her for a while now. But she doesn’t know that I’m alive. Such is life. sigh
Sheesh, flirting is SOOOOOOOOO junior high! Why would I spurn intellectual exchange and in-depth analysis of issues of importance in favor of banter charged with sexual innuendo or blatant flattery?
And, no, I’m not just bitter because my name never appears in these kinds of threads. Really. I mean it… This is not a self-serving attempt to draw attention to myself. Trust me. Would I lie?
As I recall, FCM, you were the object of my first flirt during my tenure here on the boards. My sucess in that venture, (your snores were ever so endearing), convinced me to refrain from that sort of endeavor in future. (Although I believe I may have relented once.)
Nevertheless FairyChatMom, were I to decide to engage in that sort of activity ever again, you would absolutely be the very first lady to whom I would direct my attentions. (In a Nick and Nora Charles sort of way.)
Hamadryad - Really. Not only have I seen your photo on the people pages, but quite frankly the mixture of your forthrightnesses and contraryness does something to me. Cranky of course, because she’s my bitch. Rue DeDay because the flirting would evolve into discussing the sleeping habits of pink mice, or the way certain pairs of pants have personalities. Random entertainment. Katiekilldare. Smart. Funny.
That’s probably the exact reason that I am rationed on my puter time. If I were allowed more puter time, no doubt that you and many of the other ladies in here would soon find yourselves gripped by a burning desire for me. A desire unquenchable by mere words on a screen. A desire so deep and raging, that the only presumed cure would be to visit me. However that would just feed the fires of passion within, and then one thing would lead to another and soon our home would be surrounded by swarms of women, throwing panties on the porch, endless streams of visitors in the home, and so on and so forth. Normally, that wouldn’t be a problem, however, the fine print in our condo association handbook forbid us to do anything to incite riots, peaceful or otherwise. So until I move, I am limited to my online time in the interest of being a good neighbor. One on one private meetings only
Wow!!! (face turning deep crimson) I’m flattered. I never read these posts cause no one ever wants to flirt with me I want to flirt with Blackclaw cause he’s sooo cool! (The sword-fighting thing really turns me on)
Of course I um… don’t know how to flirt really. I’ll just hang around and defend your honor by challenging everyone who irritates you to a duel.
The important thing when challenging someone to a duel is to get enough snap back when you smack em with the leather glove. It should make a really cool sound. No, wait. The really important thing is to make sure the other person doesn’t have metal gauntlets.
We should work on a post-apocolypse story together. I’m never going to start writing fun stuff again unless I feel pressured.
I would definately flirt with Swiddles, she’s -very- cute, smart, and interesting. I’m not very good at flirting though, and tend to just lock up when I get nervous. However there -is- hope for my flirting skills, as I’m getting flirting lessons from another 'doper.
