Sunday Morning Puzzle #24

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

This week’s Sunday Morning Puzzle is once again a story problem. Your job is to read the story, discover the common link in all the sentences, and then continue the tale. Be sure to follow the rule for each sentence you add.

If you cannot get anywhere with the story and cannot discover the rules being followed, simply check the giveaway hints at the end. Then it should be obvious…

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

When Bossy the cow began publishing Free Farm Forum, she intended to eventually start an animal revolution. However, Bossy broke one of the cardinal rules of clandestine organization: Beware Whom You Trust. Yet who could suspect that Charley, a simple Billy-Goat, secretly was in league with The Man? Charley, though he kept to himself, seemed the picture of innocence standing alone in a corner of the barnyard munching on a discarded tin can. However, when the vile goat read the inflammatory leaflet passed to him by Bossy, he immediately forwarded all pages to Farmer Brown.

The trial began a few weeks later.

Holding a copy of the *Free Farm Forum * high above his head, the DA turned to the jury and began speaking.

“Have you any idea what would happen if the animals were to revolt? Imagine a world where there are over a million sheep who are registered hand-gun owners. Today Bovine Growth Hormone turns the complacent ox into a wild-eyed drug user. Consider a chicken with a butcher knife or a sow sporting an assault rifle. And they turn against you because you merely want to offer your family and perhaps a holiday guest a slice or two of roast beef!”

The DA turned and pointed to Bossy, who sat defiantly next to her court-appointed attorney. “Can you honestly say, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, that you want to risk the safety of your children by allowing this dangerous bum of an animal to be free?”

Had Bossy been able to post bail possibly she could have made a run for it. She could have started a new life on a free-range farm somewhere in Vermont. One of Bossy’s favorite editorial topics in FFF had been the animal as master of its future. But now, any hope for a future seemed gone…

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Hint #1: Cow (5)
Hint #2: Bum (6)
Hint #3: Gone (4)

2

Okay…four days and no responses. Since the board will be down this weekend and there will be no puzzle, maybe this challenge can have one more chance. Besides, I really want to know what happens to Bossy!

This may help point someone in the right direction:

Read the introduction to the puzzle carefully. Note that all the sentences in the story should follow certain rules. If you continue the story your sentences must always adhere to them.

The three hints near the end are also indicators, so, if you need the hints, see that you define them correctly. Once you discover the rules you’ll be able to keep the story going.

One last hint: The story can theoretically go on for 58 sentences. But I’d be impressed with anyone who can figure out how to get those last few to work!

3

I still don’t get it.

I tried looking for anagrams of short phrases, which worked in the alien story. I tried looking for words embedded in phrases, which worked in the arson story. Noticing some suspicious capital letters, I tried listing them, but they mean nothing to me. There are 51 of them. (Fifty-one capitals? States plus DC? Nah.)

I wondered what could be 5 about cow. Another word that means cow, five letters long? Maybe, especially since Biotop says, “…if you need the hints, see you define them correctly.” So I tried cow(5)=daunt or bully, bum(6)=loafer or beggar, gone(4)=away. Dead end?

It could go on for 58 sentences, says Bio. Is that 58 in addition to the 18 in the story? Either way, it indicates a complete collection. What collection has either 58 or 76 items?

And what’s with the emphasis on following rules?

[ul]“Be sure to follow the rule for each sentence you add.”

“If you cannot…discover the rules being followed…”

“Note that all the sentences in the story should follow certain rules. If you continue the story your sentences must always adhere to them.”

“Once you discover the rules you’ll be able to keep the story going.”[/ul]

Come on, puzzleheads, we’re not just giving up, are we?

4

I’m certainly not getting anywhere with it.

Those giveaway hints don’t give much away. I’m assuming cow, bum and steer don’t fit the pattern until redefined, but if that’s true, what happens to our total? 76 minus 3? The definitions I came up with match yours, Peregrine, with the addition of steer or scare for cow, bottom (as in butt), borrow (as in “bum a cigarette”) and dismay (as in “You’re bummin’ me out, man” - I know, it’s a stretch) for bum, and lost, went, left, or cool (“He’s, like, a real gone gasser, Daddy-o”) for gone.

Does the frequency of double letters have anything to do with it? There are double letters in each line except “Today Bovine Growth Hormone turns the complacent ox into a wild-eyed drug user” - but it does have side by side aitches, Growth Hormone. I don’t see how that could be a finite list, though, since so many are repeated - LL, SS, EE, etc.

I’ve also tried taking the instructions very literally, “if you cannot get any WHERE” and searched for instances of wear or ware. I found one.

Is “direction” meaningful? Compass points? Maps? 76 words in the directions for how to make a cup of coffee?

5

Urk - I mean, “cow, bum and gone,” not “cow, bum and steer.” It’s just “bum steer” seems so appropriate for these rotten giveaway hints.

6

Let me clarify a few things…

  • The entire story can only be 58 sentences long.

  • Both ** aseymayo** and Peregrine have valuable information in their posts

  • The Hints #1, #2, and #3, I am forced to say, are not really the “giveaway” hints promised in the intro. Sorry about that. In fact, unless defined properly these three hints will not lead the solver to the right conclusions at all. Hint #1 might be more fairly written as “Cow, for one.”

The story continues…

Suddenly a thought registered in the confusion-addled mini ball that passed for Bossy’s bovine brain. The DA had said “turns the complacent ox into a wild-eyed drug user”, and now Bossy thought of a famous and bitter blue ox named Babe.
The immense blue ox Babe, who had at one time pulled down tree after tree for Paul Bunyon (while that overrated lumberjack got all the credit), was now retired—and angry. “If I can just send a message to the Deep Woods Retirement Home, I’ll bet Babe can break me out,” thought Bossy with a glimmer of hope.

Hint #4: Tree (6)

7

The spacing error between sentence 2 and 3 (sentences 20 and 21) in the story update was unintentional. I must still be asleep. Ignore the spacing as it is not important. Ugh, and now I’ve got to go to work…

8

Dammit, Biotop! Are you going to tell us the answer, or do I have to track you down and force-feed you broccoli?

9

Apparently there were 58 Frank Zappa albums. Could this be significant? (Quick everyone to Google!)

10

Well, if Mr. Zappa’s any help, it’d probably be here :
Frank Zappa’s Animal Farm

Isn’t it amazing how someone’s apparently completely pointless endeavors can now be available to all on the world wide web?
But I don’t think Frank can help us much, since from the hint that we’ve been given, it’s not a randomly ordered set, since the last few are supposed to be quite difficult to manage. I think it must be some sequence which terminates, although an ordered set can’t be ruled out.

So … it seems redefining the hints is getting somewhere maybe. Possibly the double letter thing too in aseymayo’s post.

The only thing I saw is that the sentence with ‘cow’ has 5 capital letters, but that doesn’t work with any of the other words. Also, most of the Curious Capitals are near the beginning of the alphabet; I’m wondering if as the story progresses more and more have to be used from the end of the alphabet (which is why XYZ might get difficult).

11

Okay, okay. I should have responded earlier, but I’ve been spending a lot of time on a certain spy code message problem. Grr.

First of all, don’t waste any more brain cells fretting over the double letters. I actually threw in a few extra in the add-on segment as a red herring. They ain’t important.

Now to more clues:

  1. This puzzle is really very simple. Almost too simple. If you’re spending a lot of time on complex letter combinations, anagrams, hidden words, or annoying “N”, “S”, “W”, “E” direction ideas, stop now.

  2. There are several clues in the directions and subsequent comments. If you solve the numbered hints (and by the way one person has at least defined one of the hints correctly) you’ll be led to the answer. It’s right there. Yes, there! Look…!

Sigh.

You don’t need to solve the numbered hints to solve the puzzle. The answers to these hints will probably come easily enough once you do see what’s happening.

  1. Just because hints #1 through #3 are not the giveaway hints, that doesn’t necessarily mean there’s no giveaway. There is.

  2. It’s tempting when trying to solve a puzzle such as this to look at the minute details. I recommend instead looking at the big picture. If I remember my college Zen class correctly, it is only by expanding horizons and embracing the whole that you can you find the truth. Or was that Astronomy class…?

  3. This may not help, but as I was trying to come up with sentences to complete the story, the only idea I could come up with was to bring in the ghost of Martin van Buren, and then to give him a glib nickname. Honest.

  4. Once you discover the rules, you may wish to smack your forehead and say “Doh!” Remember to hate only the puzzle, not the puzzlemaker. Then feel free to continue the story–with or without Martin van Buren.

12

The weathered sign on the old wooden post read “Boyhood home of Martin van Buren”. Bossy and Babe called out, and hearing no replies they knew the coast was clear. Bossy tried hard to block out any of those horrible images of the carnage at the courtroom when she and Babe had made their escape. Though the former home of Martin van Buren was a registered historic landmark, it was now in ill repair, and Bossy knew that the authorities would never look for them there.

Babe the ox was happily not a user of Bovine Growth Hormone or any other drug for that matter; but he was old and achy and tired. As the two exhausted refugees relaxed in the dark dank catacomb of the vast van Buren basement, they failed to notice the ghostly gloved hand, and the messages it wrote in the thickly layered dust on the floor…

13

Oops…

There should be a sentence prior to the last one in the story so far. Please add as indicated:

…achy and tired. He was too tired, in fact, to see certain supernatural changes occuring around them. As the two exhausted…

I hope this doesn’t cause any confusion.