I was the older guy in your exact scenario.
It was great but I was of a mind to settle down and she wasn’t nearly ready for such a thing.
Simply bad timing.
At first I was inclined to agree, and I got a lot of that when I was dating a lot out of my Acceptable Bracket. But then I thought about it, and I think people think much the same when they see an older guy with a younger girl – the paternal thing, or the money thing, or she’s a whore. “Sugar daddy” is a concept universal to orientations, I think.
I met my guy when I was 20 and he was 27. That was twenty-five years ago.
Any issues we’ve had haven’t really been age related. Yeah, there have been some very rough patches, but I don’t think either of us are going anywhere else soon!
Just as a couple more examples, my parents had a gap of eighteen years and were together until Dad passed away. My favorite rock star and his wife are about to celebrate their anniversary. They married at nineteen and twenty-eight, thirty years ago!
I met my SO in college when he was 19 and I was 27… and married… with two kids… :smack:
Twenty years later, most people assume he’s the elder of us two (which grumps him some!) but he’s always been a bit of an old man, he prefers older women by a long shot and any issues we have are definitely not age related.
And when we were “on a break” a year or so ago I was dating a 24 year old… age is a number, who cares! 
hey, HEY HEY!
I’ll thank you very much NOT to be stating #2 as a fact sir. 
Believe what you want, but it IS a statistical fact. http://www.saviodsilva.net/r/ss80.htm
For some reason ages before the “teen” is dropped bug me more than anything else. I was slightly uncomfortable with my 2 years younger last girlfriend’s age until she turned 20, then I was fine with it. Don’t ask me why!
I will admit to being put out that the cute new nurse who just started working on my ward is 30 (7 years older) and dating a guy 15 years older than her.
My folk’s have a seven year difference. Married when mom was 19 and dad was 26. Had me after five years of trying. So, mom was 24 and dad 31.
They’re coming up on 46 years of marriage in about a month.
Age don’t mean a thing! Go for it, girl!
At one point I went from dating a guy 11 years older than me to one 11 years younger. That switch was the source of a little mental whiplash, I must say.
In my case neither worked out long term because we wanted/expected different things from life, not because the age difference itself was a problem. Heck, my grandparents had an 11-year age difference, and they were married nearly 65 years.
I will admit though that as I ease back into the dating scene after a break, I’m less inclined to consider going out with someone more than five years younger than me. That’s partly because, on the verge of becoming a woman of a certain age cough, it’s hard for me to imagine a guy around the age of 30 having a long-term interest in an older woman (although the short-term interest is much appreciated 
).
My experience is it’s more the “life stage” vs. “age” thing that others have mentioned.
Back when I was in college, I had no trouble dating guys who were in graduate school, but had a harder time dating those who were or had been out on their own. They were used to being independent, paying their own bills, and making most of their decisions without parental input. Even though I was in college, my parents still controlled a lot of my finances and I still consulted them on major decisions. Also, I’d get kind of tired of hearing “if you think that’s stress, try being out in the working world.”
But your situation sounds like that wouldn’t be a factor. Plus, as mentioned in this thread, sometimes it works out, other times it doesn’t. At this point, it’s just a date.
My wife is nine years younger then me, we met when I was 27. We’ve been together for nine years, married for eight. The only thing I’ve found is that it helps to be open-minded about things such as movies and music. Alot of the stuff she’s turned me on to aren’t real popular with people in my age range.
I’ve also dated several women older then me (greatest difference was fourteen years.) Though they didn’t work out, the problems had nothing to do with age.
Peace - DESK
My boyfriend is 12 years older than me, we met when I was 26 and he was 38, and we’ve been together for nine years. I agree that the “stage of life” thing is the make or break. When we met, we were both professionals, both parents. I occasionally enjoy pointing out that I hadn’t actually been born yet when he asks me if I remember something, but other than that, the age difference isn’t a factor.
And for the record, our sex drives have always been, and remain, compatible.
My husband is 10.5 years older than I am. I was 25 when we met, and he was 36. It’s a little weird at odd times when we don’t understand each other’s cultural references, but otherwise, no problem.
I met my boyfriend when I was 18 and he was 27. He was shocked when he found out how old I was. Fastforward a year and we started dating right after I graduated from college. That was in June. We’ve been living together for six months and it’s all good.
I hope you don’t mind my asking, but where were you both on the life-stage spectrum at the time? (Although I know I’m getting ahead of myself, I’m thinking of what’ll happen if we’re dating when he graduates and starts thinking professional world while I’m still in school.) Or if you started in the same life stage, did that help when you moved through different ones?
Point of clarification: did you graduate when you were nineteen? I’m having a little trouble putting my finger on the chronology. Sorry! 
And thanks to everyone who’s responding! I know, we haven’t even been on a date yet (and we’re both comically busy, it might take us a while to get around to it–damn!), but after flirting up a storm in the department for the last few months, I’m curious about the long-term repercussions of a little age difference. Which, happily, seem to be few.
Come to think of it, my mother and stepfather have been married for 36 years. He’s 11 years younger than she and they met when she was…in her early 30s.
The only problem (that I know of) was about 15 years ago, he had a brief affair, she found out, but they got past it. Their relationship is pretty egalitarian and quite solid.
The SO’s about 13 years older than me. I’m in grad school, he’s got a professional job, and we’ve been together for just over 2 years. For us, age is a number, nothing else. The age difference hasn’t bothered us in the slightest (it did freak one of his mates out, but that’s easy to do, and was bloody amusing). There’ve not really been any shock moments when its hit us, and we seem to be pretty well matched in terms of everything else, to be honest, we really don’t notice it at all, and neither do our friends, unless its in a well natured taking the piss sort of way, or with at least one of his mates (that I know about!), a bit of "Woah. Dude. 
" pat on the back sort of thing.
My dad is fifteen years older than Mom. They have been married for 25 years. (Granted the last 6 of that was in seperate houses half the time. A job thing).
Me and my husband have a 2 year split, him being older and all we do is fight
Met Mr. S when I was almost 21 and he was 32. I was in college at got a job working at the same place he worked.
I dunno, we just clicked. Were “dating” (OK, kissing and so on – we never really went on “dates,” just hung out a lot) three months later, engaged nine months after that, and were married about a year after that.
That was almost 16 years ago.
Like others in the thread (which I’ve only skimmed), no problems with the age difference except for our different experiences with pop culture. He has no idea which one is Bert and which is Ernie, which cracks me up no end. It’s kinda weird, though, being 38 and a card-carrying AARP member (spousal privilege!).
I think it helps that he’s always been “young at heart,” with a personality age of somewhere between 12 and 25. Except for the gray in his beard, nobody ever believes that he’s 50!
The most extreme age differences I ever saw were in this country (Czech) 12 years ago…There were quite a few examples at the clubs of 15 - 17 year old girls and mid-twenties guys. Shocked the shit out of me that it wasn’t really looked upon as weird. I had a recently-turned 17y.o. girl get a little confused why the 24y.o. guy didn’t try to get her in bed. (And, honestly, now that I’m older and have learned that woman actually can make their own decisions at seemingly younger ages, I should have tapped that ass…).
That said, can I ask you a few questions?
- In 2 years you will be able to go to real dance clubs. Are you looking forward to it?
- Any plans for an after-college backpack trip around Europe?
- Do you have some sexual itches you want scratched? (other girls, fetishes, etc)
- Would you like to live in another place? Or join the PEace Corps or ???
If you answered YES to any of the above, well, maybe a soon-to-be-graduated-and-living-in-the-real-world guy might not be the ‘one’. In two years he could be bucking for that promotion that day you turn 21 and won’t be able to go dancing until 7am. An after college trip somewhere? Well, girl, if you don’t jump that cute Italian you will meet on the train to MArsailles because of some guy back home, you will regret it when you are 60. Itches generally don’t go away until they are scratched and wanting to live elsewhere is one too.
Otherwise put…I wouldn’t think about the long term here. Just enjoy the guy for now.
My two very good friends have been with each other for over 10 years and have a 15 year difference in age (met at 18 and 33). My sister is married to a guy 10 years older than her (met 24 and 34). So, it can work out…But both my sister and my female friend were looking for family-type things, not ‘explore myself’ things. Which side of that scale do you lean towards?
-Tcat
Met my wife-to-be in grad school when I was 34 and she was 23. She’d been supporting herself - parents in no position to offer more than incidental help - since heading off to college six years earlier, so she was mature for her age.
We’re 52 and 41 now. Seems to be working out pretty well so far.