Terrible songs that never deserved to be hits

Too Late For Goodbyes - Julian Lennon.

Sirius XM’s Yacht Rock is one of the stations in regular rotation on my radio; and it plays Rupert Holmes a lot. I think his song “Him” is a lot better than Escape. Has a better groove, better hook, better lyrics, better everything.

Apologies for sacrilegiously exhuming this from the Unholy Dead but it just hit me like a something or other:

One Man Woman

I just started singing it, out of the blue, for no reason…

How about Madonna’s “Music”?

There’s an adult contemporary station in my city that seems to play it every.single.day around 4pm.

From Wikipedia "…veteran music journalist Dave Marsh opines of “Walking in Memphis”: “Its perfectly written narrative takes into account the whole history of American music, from where it begins in storefront church gospel and W.C. Handy’s blues to where it shoots out into Elvis and Al Green and, at the climactic moment, Marc Cohn himself.”[

I rather like that one. “Silver Thunderbird”, too.

If any one actually likes Convoy then please grovellingly explain with your head bowed down and stuff.

Nope, I’ll proudly admit to liking it with my head held high. The movie sucked, though. 10-4, Good Buddy. Catch ya’ on the ol’ flip flop.

Where did you get that piece of crap?
The Original.

I love Convoy (and pretty much everything else by C. W. McCall, and I too admit it with my head high.

Geez, yeah. Everything about the movie, including the theme, sucked. The original song was great, though.

I should qualify that C.J.'s lowdown is cool - it’s those milquetoasts singing in the chorus who need to get a death.

How can you NOT love a song with the phrase, “eleven long-haired friends o’ Jesus in a chartreuse microbus”?

[now checking … of course I got it right, except most sites spell out “of”]

Granted, “chartreuse” is not up there with “brucellosis” for Most Unlikely Word in a Song, but it’s still pretty good.

Well, that’s how somewhere in the darkness he broke even. :slight_smile:

“Our Lips Are Sealed” - Go-Gos.

Wayne Newton’s “Daddy Don’t You Walk So Fast” (with Danke Schoen a close contender) - his voice was really annoying before he took on a more “macho” look and sound.

Sonny and Cher “The Beat Goes On,” with profound comments on the 1960s such as “the grocery store’s a supermart” and “electrically they keep a baseball score…” revolutionary times indeed.

Billy Joel, “We Didn’t Start the Fire.”

Rogers didn’t write The Gambler. It was written by Don Schlitz.

Johnny Come Home by Fine Young Cannibals. (Ohh an arthouse cinema reference! I just know I’m going to like this band!!)

Why did Johnny leave home? - probably your ultra-annoying vocal style.

Seriously - because he had a horrible home life. His father beat him. But I admit Roland’s voice can be whiney.

The song shares a theme with Smalltown Boy by Bronski Beat, except in that song he’s definitely leaving home for the big city because he’s gay.

Worse than the Gambler, even, is Coward of the County. Man is that an annoying song. In the version I hear in my head, he gets his ass kicked by the good ol’ boy rapists, because he never actually learned to fight, and they had. A good heart won’t win over experience.

I like Convoy, even though the engineer in me knows you can’t talk on a CB from Jersey to Omaha. Geeze!

Wolf Creek Pass is my favorite, but I was sadly disappointed to learn there is about five miles of straight flat road between getting off the hill and finding that feed store in downtown Pagosa Springs. They lied to me!

But if I ever drive truck, I will have my own chromium plated, fully illuminated, gen-u-ine accessory shift knob. Probably can get one at Iowa 80, the world’s largest truck stop. They have every fully illuminated truck accessory known to man.

You aren’t familiar with skip?