Holy shit, that’s ridiculous. I started babysitting other people’s children when I was 11, and watched my 2 younger sisters alone at least a year prior to that.
There is no state in which a child must be 12 to stay home alone. Illinois is the real outlier in this group, requiring kids be 14 to be home alone, which is really nuts.
Here are the laws. Latchkey Kids Legal Age Limits Listed By State
Most places have no laws, but a few have ‘guideline’ ages, which mean depending on circumstances it may or may not be appropriate to leave your kids alone.
Depending on where you live and how busy they are, CPS doesn’t always contact you right away. You still may hear from them next week as the cop is a mandated reporter, especially if there are laws in your state regarding specific ages when one can leave a child home alone.
Asshole or not, I’d much rather give a phone # out to a cop then deal with CPS.
Not quite. The Illinois statute that defines “neglected minor” is 705 ILCS 405/2-3(1) and encompasses a number of situations. One of which is the following:
The statute then presents a non-exhaustive list of 15 factors used to evaluate whether the minor was left without supervisions for an unreasonable period time without regard for yadda yadda yadda.
I’ve had two experiences with CPS- the first was when my youngest son’s father called to complain that I had all kinds of guns in the house after I left him when my son was 5 months old. I’d never even owned one gun. CPS just passed it off to a program called Family Builders and they gave me all kinds of benefits and bonuses, because that’s what they do. Plus, my worker put in my name as parent of the month, and of course up against most of the parents in that system, I shone, so I won fifty bucks. The second time, CPS came out because that same baby, at 6 or 7? told someone at school that his older brother had beat him up, I had called the cops, and his brother was in juvie. None of that ever happened, yet I was given free day care and offered a host of other services.
So the OP could actually turn this to her advantage, but then again, voluntarily allowing CPS into your life can also backfire on you, so it’s a crapshoot. I just happen to have had good experiences with them after they were already involved, although for bullshit reasons.
I’m not sure what I would have done in that situation, but I think letting them in might not have been a terrible I idea. First off, I wouldn’t do it unless I had NOTHING WHATSOEVER that could cause a problem for me in the house. Anything that would make the cop take a second glance. A gun, a vicodin on the bathroom counter even a bottle of bleach on the kitchen table (not illegal, but since they are investigation possible child neglect…). The reason I’d say you should let them in is a)They’ll see that there’s no child in the house, maybe even follow up with your sister and then be on their marry way, end of story 2)They may follow up with the caller, so it might stop this person from doing it again in the future and 3)Almost for sure whomever called will either be listening at their door (if this is an apartment) of watching from their window. They’ll see the cop go into your house and then leave a few minutes later as you wave and say “Goodbye, thanks officer” If this person is looking for drama, this’ll be really disappointing.* Not only that, but when you are talking to the officer while he’s leaving you can check to see who’s peeking through the mini-blinds or outside smoking. It might give you a clue as to who it is.
BTW, I totally support your decision not to let the cops into your house. You never know what can happen. A few years ago my MIL was babysitting at my house. Someone in the neighborhood was burning leaves and the cops were trying to figure out who it was. They were going door to door. When the got to my house my MIL said it wasn’t her and for some reason they asked if they could come in and look around. My MIL, the law-abiding citizen she was, said sure (my response would have been to say “No, do you really think I’m burning leaves inside my house? Feel free to check out the backyard if you’d like”). Anyways, they came in and one of my dogs nipped the cop. Luckily nothing ever became of it though.
*If the person isn’t doing it for drama or they’re just a busybody, I think it would be more likely that they would have knocked on your door at some point and offered to babysit if you ever need to run an errand.
I’ve never been reported for anything but I have filed one complaint in this county against my son’s father because of something pretty serious that my son said and it went nowhere. I didn’t even get so much as a follow up after they totally neglected to talk to him (or the kid) at all. I don’t expect to hear from them anyway but I’m not terribly concerned by the potential of being reported.
astro, if I do hear from them, I will be as cooperative as necessary but, outside a sworn statement from my sister that says he was out there at the time of this “incident”, I’m not sure what else they would expect. They meet Alex and he’s fine and healthy and happy, they come into my home and it’s clean and safe… then what?
I haven’t ever researched laws re: leaving kids alone because I’ve never had a reason to do that (always home after school, always have a sitter available (my parents are walking distance away; it’s very convenient), etc.) but my sister says in our state kids can be left alone one hour per their most recently completed grade in school up to some magical age I don’t remember. So, if that’s accurate, he could be left for one hour but she says it does not apply at night. I don’t know if any of that is true because, like I said, I’ve never had a reason to know. According to Palo’s link, there is no minimum age here. We should keep in mind that this was at night though, not a short time after school, and I haven’t read through the link enough to know if that makes a difference or not.
needscoffee, I have a theory but the more I think about it the more I doubt it. There is a house next to me that has a dog who is constantly let out not only not on a leash but also without supervision. Another neighbor notified police (no animal control here) after this dog bit her small child in the face. The owners were warned. I notified police when this same dog lunged at my son and knocked him over but retreated after I kicked it in the ribs. The owners were warned and I and other neighbors were advised to call every single time that dog wandered from its own yard into another yard or our common play area because it seemed whenever they were called the dog was let in before they had a chance to respond and apparently a half dozen witnesses and a scared little girl don’t matter; they have to see the dog off a leash out of its yard. The owners were warned a total of six times before one officer finally told me that they would be cited but, because he didn’t have any citations on him at that time, he would have to come back the following day and leave it in their mailbox. When he came back, the dog was out AGAIN; these people do not learn.
So they were finally fined and the cop asked if he could list me as the complainant in that report because, even though several people had complained, I was apparently the most vocal and I was the one who had complained the time it did result in a ticket. Retaliation for that is a theory. I doubt it because these don’t seem like the kind of people to draw attention to themselves like that. Slash my tires, maybe, but not call the cops. Incidentally, that dog was just in my yard today baring its teeth and growling at me. I didn’t bother calling anybody though.
Beyond them, I can’t think of anybody else who would want to cause trouble for me so that leaves actual Concerned Citizens. I don’t know who it was. I drove Ben to work again last night because I had yet another appointment this morning. I had the greatest urge to knock on everybody’s door to let them know Alex still wasn’t home.
Cattitude, I did offer to give him her phone number. I only have a cell phone though and I don’t know her number (or anybody’s, really; contact lists blew it for me) off the top of my head and I told him I wasn’t sure I could access my contact list while I was on the phone so I might have to call him back. That’s when he started getting aggressive and rude and stopped asking about my sister at all. That’s also around the time he asked why I was being so confrontational with him. :rolleyes:
I live in a small city (pop: about 3600) in a small county (pop: maybe 15,000) and, while I’m not sure how busy CPS is, I know they are well-staffed (I did a number of volunteer projects for them) for our community size. I’m not saying it isn’t possible I might hear from them sometime next week, but I definitely would have expected to hear from them by now. We’ll see but I’m really not worried about it.
Joey, I have had unpleasant experiences with police before that may have contributed to my decision. It doesn’t help that I didn’t recognize the guy’s name (I am somewhat familiar with employee’s of the sheriff’s department as I am currently the primary campaign manager for the non-incumbent candidate for sheriff in the next election; I was more familiar with the town’s police department before they were disbanded, though) and he was so much more of an asshole than I can accurately portray here. Very aggressive and persistent and just a huge prick. Like I said earlier, that’s not really conducive to me wanting to be cooperative. Perhaps if he had been someone I know, or at least am familiar with or had ever heard of, and hadn’t been such a dick about it, I would have been more comfortable allowing him to come back.
Something to add. After this is all done with, perhaps you could call the sheriffs station and ask the they follow up with the person who made the call. With any luck they’ll call that person back and let them know what was going on. At best, maybe it really was a concerned citizen and this will put their mind at ease. At worst it was someone that was being a prick on purpose and if they keep doing this eventually the cops might start ignoring it or talking to them about abusing the system.
Also, come to think of it. If you wait two weeks or so, you can probably go get a copy of the report. If it wasn’t anonymous, the reporters name might be on it.
Oh, I was going to say, after which I went to Ben’s workplace to pick him up only to be met by barricades and security guards directing traffic around a SWAT team (it’s actually called an emergency response team here but guys in camo pants and bulletproof vests and helmets carrying AR-15s… same thing, pretty much) and every damn squad car in the county. Fucking SCARIEST THREE HOURS OF MY LIFE waiting to hear from him.
I’m glad CPS didn’t call today because I was under pretty much maximum stress with minimum patience.
Joey, good idea. I’ll forget about ever following up on it though and then stop caring in a couple weeks when I move. 
I certainly hope you left your kid safely at home instead of bringing him into a potentially dangerous situation like that.
That made me giggle like an 8 year old with a fart joke, omg. Hehehe.
Actually, he’s still at my sister’s. I’m going to drag him out of there later today.
I understand your reluctance to dealing with a jerk-off cop, but I think this:
…is our bottom line.
mmm
I’m still wondering why your neighbor just assumed there wasn’t a babysitter staying home with your son . . . unless they’ve been literally stalking you, and making note of all the comings and goings.
Interesting point, that hadn’t occurred to me.
Of course, if they were stalking me, they should have known that Alex wasn’t home.
You can tell the cops anything whether it’s true or not, and they’ll investigate. Whoever your Mrs. Grundy is a nosy idiot.
I was going to say, “Mrs. Kravitz”, myself.
Your references are lost on me. I googled them so I know where Mrs. Grundy and Mrs. Kravitz come from, but I don’t know why they are relevant. 
They’re stereotypical nosey neighbors. Mrs. Kravitz is from the tv show Bewitched; I think Mrs. Grundy is a more generic reference.
The fact that this cop was a jerk on the phone is a great reason for not volunteering to tell him to come on over. No telling what this guy could do once he got in your home.
Au contraire . It is the police who imposed, she has rights, and she exercised them. I bet they drop the matter.
NEVER let the officers into your home without a warrant.
ALWAYS exercise your right to not speak to them.