The Amazing Race Haaaate List

Cafe Society
1

Recent TAR threads have bashed the current horrible people, The Weaver Family, who have proven themselves so odious that people are longing for Colin from a couple of seasons ago.

Nearly two hundred people have participated in the 8 runnings of the race. Some were favorites, some were forgettable, some were gone too soon to tell.

But a small number have left their impression upon us by being the most odious beings imaginable. These are the people that tempt us not to tune in for fear they will not be eliminated.

Let us discuss then, the population of The Amazing Race Hate List. The people whom, when you are presented with the option of being trapped on an elevator with them for a half hour or having your head dismantled by a spiral slicer, leave you weighing your options.

I’ll take a historical approach.

Season 1 gave us Joe and Bill, aka Team Guido. They set themselves up as villains early on, going out of their way to inconvenience their opponenents, and generally being arrogant and condescending. They began the hate list. But in retrospect, they were simply choosing not to play friendly with people they knew they eventually wanted to eliminate.

The Hate List as of Season 1:
Team Guido

Season 2 gave us Wil, of Wil and Tara fame. Far from being a likeable rogue, Wil was a miserable shit who destroyed the spirit of his estranged wife and teammate. He rose to the top of the hate list in short order.

The Hate List as of Season 2:
Wil
Team Guido

Season 3 Brought Ian. Ian was the token old man on this race, but distinguished himself by not once failing to browbeat his wife or blame her for his failings. His only mitigating quality were that she didn’t particular let him get to her, which is more than you can say for Wil.

The real freakshow on this outing anyway was Flo. For those who weren’t watching back in season 3, but remember Colin, picture the Broken Ox meltdown 24 hours a day. And three octaves higher. And ten times as whiny. Just the dim memory of her performance is enough to make me cringe. And the worst part is: she won.

The Hate list as of Season 3:
Flo
Wil
Ian
Team Guido

Season 4 featured a pair of evil robots known as Reichen and Chip, unfriendly and occasionally mean, although in hindsight not particularly bad. Late in the game, when the pressure was really on, Kelly of Jon and Kelly was rather odious, but the real annoyance this time around was a lazy, petulant model named Jaree, who wa so sullen you’d swear she’d never left junior high school.

The Hate List as of Season 4:
Flo
Wil
Ian
Jaree
Kelly
Reichen and Chip
Team Guido

Season 5 featured a number of odious personages, far more than one leg of a poor little round-the-world race deserves. The pre-ordained bitch was supposed to be Alison, the first stunt cast on the show, a refugee from the previous season’s Big Brother. However, she got knocked out on leg two.

Since Kevin and Drew in Season 1, the producers have realized the value of having a couple of relaxed, portly lunkheads on board, but made a serious misstep with pizza brothers Marshall and Lance. Bitter, xenophobic and out of shape, they were the first eliminated team to ever not finish a leg due to injury and bad sportsmanship, forcing Phil to come out to their scarab-scraping site to eject them.

Twins Kami and Karli make this list for being infuriatingly stupid. Brandon and Nicole make it for not only being the first example of people who demonstrate their oft-stated deep belief in Jesus by behaving about as horribly as people can, but also by lasting so long while behaving that way.

The really nasty team this time was cousins Charla and Mirna, not only awful, but possibly crazy as well. The less said the better.

The king though, was of course Colin. Damn near psychotic, and truly evil to his teammate and girlfriend, Colin managed to make us forget both Wil and Flo.

The Hate List as of Season 5:
Colin
Flo
Wil
Chmirna
Brandon and Nicole
Pizza Brothers
Ian
Kami and Karli
Jaree
Reichen and Chip
Kelly
Team Guido

Season 6 continued the ratings-saving (at least in the minds of the producers) new tradition of casting for odious personalities. Not only did we have the vindictive winners, Freddy and Kendra, who had the gall to beat out one of the most well-loved teams, Kris and Jon, but we also had the role-reversal spousal abuse case, Lori who emasculated her wrestler husband, Bolo. Not to mention the obnoxious, whiny, quitter, Hayden.

But who are we kidding? The real trainwreck of a human was Jonathon, who was so reprehensible that he can not be referred to in print by name, but must be represented by the typographical symbol for asshole (*). He had reduced his centerfold wife, Victoria, to merely an unloved appendage of his evil self. He was obnoxious, deluded, and severely abusive.
The Hate List as of Season 6:
*/Victimia
Colin
Flo
Wil
Freddy and Kendra
Hayden
Chmirna
Brandon and Nicole
Pizza Brothers
Ian
Lori
Kami and Karli
Jaree
Reichen and Chip
Kelly
Team Guido

Season 7 was no slacker when it came to obnoxious personalities, either. You had nasty gay son Patrick, psycho boyfriend Ray, dopey vet Ron and his pet pit bull, Kelly, obsessed competitors Lynn and Alex, and the shrill Gretchen. But for flat out odiousness, we had Rob, whom I must reluctantly name as a fello Bostonian. He was about as obnoxious as they come. While arguably the most canny racer since Colin, his endless smugness eliminated any possibility of sympathy for him. His fiancee, Amber, already a millionaire from Survivor, grated with her non-perosnality and her mere unjustified presence.

The Hate List as of Season 7:
*/Victimia
Romber
Colin
Flo
Wil
Freddy and Kendra
Hayden
Chmirna
Ron and Kelly
Brandon and Nicole
Ray
The Pizza Brothers
Ian
Gretchen
Patrick
Lori
Kami and Karli
Jaree
Lynn and Alex

(At this point, with two Kellys, I’m dropping of the old one, whose misdeeds I have more or less forgotten until reviewing material for this thread. That means I have to drop Team Guido, but they’ve redeemed themselves with witty and insightful commentary on later seasons, so I’m OK with that. I’ll also float one to Reichen and Chip. But the memory of Lynn’s petty obsessions and continued dislike of Jaree makes me stop there. At least for now)

And now, we are about to finish Season 8, with its own set of doozies. No one is going to miss last night’s Philiminees, the Godlewskis anytime soon, but they were surpassed by Papa Rogers and the whole Paolo clan, at least for the bulk of the time they were in the race.

And we all know who inspired this thread to begin with.

The Hate List as of Season 8:
The Effing Weavers
*/Victimia
Romber
Colin
Flo
Wil
Freddy and Kendra
Hayden
Chmirna
The Paolos
Papa Rogers
Ron and Kelly
Brandon and Nicole
Ray
The Pizza Brothers
Ian
Gretchen
Patrick
The Godlewskis

(OK, I’ll drop everyone after that.)

So this is why Colin is starting to look good in comparison. He four down on the list now, which is where Team Guido was in Season 3, and they were already looking quite tolerable at that point.

So who’s on your list?

2

I can’t imagine what there is to hate about Boston Rob. I greatly admire him in practically every respect of his gameplay. But on the top of my hate list is now the Weavers (except maybe Rolly). It’s one thing to beat people up with your ego a la Colin; it’s quite another to beat people up with Jesus.

3

I can’t agree with the Chipster hate (and not just because they are hot). I haven’t seen the last few episodes of their season yet but overall they didn’t seem evil, just kind of dumb. Molly was way more evil.

Add Teri to the hate list. Yeah, Ian was a complete dick, but she wasn’t much better.

4

My problem with Rob is … well, Rob. I’ve hated him since the first time he appeared on my TV (that I know of, anyway), way back when he was on Survivor: Marquesas. And not for any really rational reason, either, except his general “Boston Rob-ness,” which strikes me deeply and viscerally. He comes off to me as unctuous and smug. I don’t think he’s particularly smart, charming, attractive, etc.; in short, I don’t think he’s anything he seems to think he is. But I admit that it’s a personal thing; there are plenty of people who adore him for the same reasons I dislike him.

Anyway … my Haaaaaaate List is a little smaller than yours, scotandrsn, but I still think of all these people “fondly” when I need to induce a seizure or aneurysm. Here goes:

The Effing Weavers
Romber
Flo
Frank (before the alien lobotomy, when he was mean to Margarita)
Ian & Teri
Hayden / Rebecca / Kendra (three-way tie)
The Effing Weavers (they’re here twice, because they’re that hateful)
Roger Clemens (who goes on every hate list I’ve ever made)

5

Actually, looking over the episode blogs from the veterans, I’m realizing I need to alter the top of my list somewhat.

While the Effing Weavers are certainly about as repellant as they come, I realize i’d take all four of them over *. I mean, the Weasels will soon be gone and forgotten for me, more or less like Freddy and Kendra, but here is *, still leaving a bad taste in my mouth two races later.

So consider the top of my list altered to:
*
The Effing Weavers
Victimia
.
.
.
etc.

6

The unearned smugness. He is quite impressed with his own strategies, to the point that you almost forget that the only thing they’ve ever won him directly is…Amber.

7

My personal #1 hated team is one nobody ever seems to remember, and that’s Kim & Leslie (aka Dark Hair/Light Hair) from TAR1. They were the ones who stole the cab from Paul & Amie AFTER THEY WERE ALREADY IN IT, and laughed about it for the rest of the episode. (“You’re a fat bitch!” was directed at them.) Luckily, Karma caught up with them as they dickered for change with their cab driver, wasting just enough time for all the trailing teams to pass them at the Arc de Triumphe, and they were eliminated. Mark my words, if they had lasted more than 2 episodes, they would have made Flo and Jonathan seem like a breath of fresh air.

Dunno what to say about the Effin Weavers. I’m kinda pissed at them because I kept defending them while everyone else was jumping on the Hate Train, and then they started throwing apple cores at people and insulting Lance Armstrong wannabes. Still, I don’t hate them with nearly the same passion as everyone else – they’re more “Amusingly Evil”, like the Guidos and Terian and Colin-of-the-Broken-Ox.

Flo…what can I say? Flo traumatized me. Flo sent me back to therapy and made me question the whole order of the universe. Eventually I justified it all by telling myself how Zach really, really, really deserved to win, because he won the race with HER. But I’m still lobbying for a change to the race rules that make it so if you threaten to quit more than 3 times in a single leg, that’s it. You’re disqualified.

TAR4…not a lot of evil teams in this one, which of course made it one of the most boring seasons ever. Probably the closest to being evil was Tian & Jaree, who were more like the Godlewskis or Paolos with their constant internal bickering. Chip & Kim…oops I mean Reichen…weren’t that evil at all.

TAR6…how soon do we forget Adam & Rebecca?? They turned dysfunctional relationships into an art form. Not that TAR6 was short on despicable teams, of course, with *than/Victima and Freddy/KKKendra leading the way.

TAR7…I started off hating Team Romber, but grew to really like 'em. Rob’s refusal to do the Meatblock was one of the most brilliant strategic moves ever on the Race, mainly because he convinced two other teams to quit as well, thus guaranteeing he would NOT be eliminated that round, even with the penalty. Lynn/Alex were obnoxious, but were just a minor annoyance compared to the Guidos and the Weevils.

TAR8…Papa Rogers, 'nuff said. (I think before the race started I joked about Hunter Schroder being the token Columbine teen, but I was wrong…it’s Brock Rogers, definitely.) Again, that’s probably why the Weavers don’t bother me so much, because their type of supercilious, hypocritical Christianity is merely sad, whereas the Rogers credo is downright dangerous. Heck, just look at our current Administration…

So my hastily drawn-up Hate List looks something like this:
Flo
Kim & Leslie
Mr. Rogers
Adam & Rebecca
Team Victoria’s Secret
Freddy & KKKendra
Charla & Mirna
The Guidos
The Effin Weavers
Colin, Christie & their beloved Ox
Wil & Tara
Terian

Note that only the top seven rate as “GET OFF MY TV SCREEN!” evil, while the rest fall in the “Love To Hate” category. I was also tempted to add Kris & Jon from TAR6 to the list, who annoyed me because they were just so damn happy all the time. :cool:

8

I haven’t seen earlier seasons, so I can’t comment on the relative “merits” of the earlier racers. However, that being said:

The only way a Racer makes it onto my personal Haaaate list is if they mistreat, belittle, or are otherwise unpleasant to other people, especially their partner.

So, starting at the top, Jonathon is still far and away the most Hateful racer I’ve seen. I know the Weavers are the darlings of the moment (for some definitions of the word “darling”), but as odious as self-righteousness and aggressive ignorance and sneering condescention are, I find continual emotional spousal abuse to be far, far more disturbing. Like Scot, I find him to be the only racer that leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

By the same metric, Boston Rob doesn’t even make my list. Heck, I like Boston Rob (as a racer; I suspect he’d annoy me quickly in real life). I do understand why people don’t like him, sure: he’s cocky and smack-talking and something of a prick. But he wasn’t unpleasant to anyone (except in the context of trying to eliminate other people), and he surely wasn’t unpleasant to other people on his own team, unlike Jonathon. Or Colin. Or the Paolos, or Ron and Kelly, or Ray, or Papa Rogers, or the mercifully eliminated Alison, or Tian/Jaree, or a few other people I can think of.

9

Damn. Meant to include them, too. There really were a lot of miserable people on TAR6, weren’t there?

10

Exactly. The Weavers actually get along with each other better than just about any other team that’s ever been in the Race. They also have a wonderful way of dealing with Killer Fatigue…just when they’re about to completely break down, they choose to do something completely silly & insane instead. Freak-dancing in the Waffle House parking lot may be disturbing to some, but I find it quite charming, actually. :slight_smile:

Oooh, thought of another haaate team – the Lawyer Chicks from TAR3. (What were their names again?) Actually, it wasn’t anything they did on the race itself, but afterwards when they got eliminated for taking a taxi instead of walking to the Pit Stop like the clue instructed. Basically, they blamed the cameraman for telling them it’s okay to take a taxi…like it’s his job to tell you ANYTHING, you dorks!

11

You can’t compare obnoxious Weavers with someone like Jonathan who was either abusive (according to the whole world) or bordering on abusive (To Victoria). They should be at the top of the list, or at least he should be.

I didn’t hate Rob, just thought he was smarmy.

12

I rate the Effing Weavers as “highly” as I do because, unlike the Guidos and Colin, I do not find their antics to be “good TV.” The Guidos, with their iced tea and their air conditioned splendor and their living in Paris for two years, were good TV. Colin’s skirmishes with Crazy Mirna and the cops and the broken ox were excellent television. The Effing Weavers throwing apple cores out the window and asking God for directions and setting themselves up as some bizarrely persecuted minority? Just odious. It’s not amusing to me.

But anyway … I also left Jonathan and Victoria off my list, and they should have been right up there at the top. I try to block them out of my memory but they refuse to go away, those bastards.

13

I have to admit that my own perceptions are probably colored by the amount of time I had to be exposed to them, and how long ago it was.

Ray probably ranks as low as he does because he got eliminated halfway though. Wil still ranks high because I had to put up with him right up until the final footrace to the finish. The fact he doesn’t rank higher (he really was one of the most awful racers ever) is that it’s been so long.

The lawyer chicks weren’t even on my radar anymore because they got eliminated so early.

14

I think Jonathan (and Victoria) get their own category of vileness: Uber-Vile! The Weavers are nasty, dumb and ugly and they hide behind their Jesus-ness, so they’re at the top of my current list of Nasties.

Reichen and Chip led me to victory in the office pool, so they’ll always have a special place in my heart.

Colin and Wil need to go some to match the Weevil family in rotten-ness, IMHO.