So, I figure I should get this out somewhere just for a broad analysis and to see what people think.
Anyways, as the thread title may have indicated, I have 2 tickets for a concert tonight. They were purchased late last year for an Arcade Fire show, for my girlfriend and I. I am a fan of the band and the girlfriend enjoyed what she heard so when I asked if she’d be game, she was all for it. I paid for both tickets, the show was my treat - it wasn’t enough to break the bank account, but more than just a mere trifle. We have both been excited about it.
So, my girlfriend is applying for seminary and one of her options has their application due the same day as the concert, in order to be considered for full scholarship. So, ok fine, she’d been aware of the requirements for the application for a few weeks (if not more than a month). However, about 2 weeks ago she found out about this deadline date for scholarships. The application was done fairly quickly, but there was this 600 word autobiographical essay with it. And she kind of outlined for it this week and was going to sit down and write it last evening (it can be submitted online, so no need to wait for the mail).
In order for her to concentrate on the essay writing (we are living together) she asked if I’d go out last night, so I did (go out and drink, twist my arm why don’t ya!!). I got back around 11:30 and was getting ready for bed and she indicated that she’d take a brief catnap with me and get up at 12:30 and finish up the essay so she could send the finished product to her sister before work for proofreading and then finally submit it to the seminary after she (my gf) got home from work. At the time she basically seemed to imply the essay work was going well, and that it was almost done and it just needed some fine tuning.
I got up at like 2:30 to go to the bathroom and my gf was in bed. She woke when I got back into bed and I asked her - how was the writing? She indicated that she hadn’t gotten up at 12:30 and would just wake up a bit early to finish. For whatever reason I got this sinking feeling in my stomach and couldn’t fall back asleep - I was gripped by this fear that she was waiting until the last second to bail on the concert. I couldn’t fall asleep. So the next time she got up to use the bathroom, I expressed this concern and her response was “I hope I can get it done by the concert”, which wasn’t reassuring. I expressed the opinion that I felt it would have been mean to cancel on the concert at the last second. To which she indicated that she didn’t intend to be mean - and because I was exhausted and half asleep I said something like you don’t have to intend meanness to be mean - you could be negligent, which started an argument that I feel was resolved ok-ish.
Anyways… my feelings on this were that I can understand having to get an essay done. However, waiting until the last second to cancel is simply rude and mean (yes, I do realize I could have expressed myself better, but it was 2:30 and I was half sleepy). I feel that if I didn’t bring it up then, it would have been told to me an hour before the concert - even though she indicated that she would have texted me as she left for work; and this morning she wrote a note that I almost missed about the fact that she doesn’t think she can make the concert so I perhaps I can find someone else to go.
Here’s the problem - its less than 24 hrs notice to do something on a Friday night. The vast majority of my friends have made plans already and I really, really, really do not want to go to a concert alone - as a lot of it involves waiting around for the band to start playing.
So thanks for reading this far and I’d be happy to hear any thoughts - was I too much of a dick? was she? etc. And I’m sure I’ve left out a few facts (I’m kinda tired from my lack of sleep - another reason why I don’t think I’ll be able to go to the concert if no one else can go with me).
I do realize I’m on SDMB, with its tradition of ripping apart the OP writer, but please go easy on me :).