It’s not the size, but how you use it… Beauty is in the eye of the beholder…To each his own…
But don’t you have to pass the qualifying rounds before you can become a contender? Beauty is subjective…doesn’t that just mean that on a scale of 1-10, someone’s 6 might actually be someone else’s 8, but come on, no one’s 2 is actually going to be someone else’s 10. It doesn’t work that way. You can’t make the elephant man sexy no matter how hard you try.
And how much better can you really use your dick? What do you mean it’s how you use it. Your dick is not like a finger. It’s got one motion, in and out. You can go faster or slower. Wtf are girls trying to say, that they like to take on 3 inch jackhammer? Or maybe girls have a higher regard for profficient
dick slapping skills? I mean, how dynamic is a penis really? Are people with big dicks somehow less able to do things with their bigger dicks? So people with big dicks can’t use them? Of course size matters.
Does a person with a small dick really stand a chance, or are we coming up with excuses to make ourselves feel better; to cover up the idea that there may be true inequality we can never overcome? Are girls propagating this idea out of sheer pity? Like the way we tell fat chicks they are pretty? Why do we not talk about how much a big penis in a small tight vag hole is actually a pretty amazing idea. Don’t you think what we’re really trying to go for is some type of borderline masochism. Can we really succeed in substituing idealistic fantasies with some idea of equality? Is that how things really work? How can we criticize the breast implant. Isn’t medical science is our only hope? Shouldn’t that be one of it’s most dire responsiblities. To free us from the prejudices put on us by nature. How can we not be sickened by the sheer hypocrisy of how an average person’s tendency to prioritize this idea of a “personality” while beautiful people date other beautiful people. How fat date the fat and the ugly date the ugly. Have we moved anywhere? Can sex ultimately be replaced with intimacy? Should it?
…ya, this could’ve probably been framed in a less biased, naive, and pc sort of a way, but then this thread wouldn’t attract the typical wave of
wonderful ‘oh what a bitter fat but tiny, 40 yr old virgin that I am’ type of comments that typically tends to come along, distracting everyone
from ever dissecting these issues. So have your best crack at it.
regarding the dick, one goes through several universes of darwinian selection before you worry about your woman taking out a tape measure. i think my sexy telephone voice will trump all the 14-inchers in this forum. they won’t even get a chance to display.
i was expecting this thread to develop more along the lines of MMA, the bismark vs the yamato, bullet weight and caliber. you know, geeky stuff.
Size may matter, but it’s not the only thing that matters. Your penis isn’t the only sexual organ you posess, and if you know how to ring her chimes, your size probably doesn’t matter that much to her, unless you are so small that the process of actually making babies is hindered.
As far as looks being relative, nobody has the same set of standards except by coincidence. Your “2” might feature many characteristics that I value that you do not, so that she might even be an “8” or higher for me.
Of course, I’m in my fifties now, and recognize that time and gravity have a way of impressing themselves upon one’s body. As far as I’m concerned, as long as a woman’s appearance doesn’t actually repulse me, she gets credit for ever having been beautiful so long as she has a good sense of humor and is willing to explain to me what she’s mad about and whether it was something I did (I really don’t have a clue, ladies, but I’m willing to be corrected, so long as I feel like I’m being loved and not abused). I of course, reserve the right to concede that I may be wrong and make amends without actually admitting intent.
But enough about me. I’ll shut up so the females can tell you the TRVTH.
Hmm, I want to broaden up this discussion topic a bit as I’ve realized I probably got to carried away with the penis thing. The intention is to cover a broad range of sexual deficiencies whether it be penis size, breasts to small, way too big, obesity, or just general unattractiveness. I wanted to explore whether or not there is any objectivity in sexuality/sexiness/attractiveness and how so much emphasis is put these things, obviously more so by media and popular culture.
I think this is the general cliche answer, but I want to challenge this one a bit to see if we can look further. My point in bringing up the elephant man is to imply the question, is the elephant man really anyone’s 10? And to move it even further, can we ever setup society in a way so that everyone looks at the elephant man as a 10? This being a true test of whether physical attrraction is subjective. And even if we can’t, will we ever be able to set up society in a way where we look at the elephant man and say “hey, forget about the way this guy looks”. Can we ever frame this person in a way that’s sexually attractive?
Generally whenever this sort of a topic is brought up, there seems to be a tendency towards a more optimistic sentiment that we as society have moved beyond judging others by physical appearances. I want to challenge this notion an ask whether this is really what you see when you walk into a bar or a night club or any college campus or almost anywhere really? Is it really not true that attractive people will tend to date other equally attractive people? Obese people tend to get with other obese people? I mean of course there’s exceptions, but try to think in terms of what statistically tends to happen in a larger context. Or maybe i should…
The question is, I think, should we really frame everyone as sexually attractive? Joseph Merrick was terribly affected by his condition, not just because it made him unattractive but because it was physically crippling in many other ways. Taking into account that he died before the age of thirty, I find it hard to imagine, especially considering the historical context, that he would have had the time to mentally overcome his deformities and been comfortable enough with his own body to enjoy having sex. I’m not saying that he didn’t have sexual desires himself, but chances are the thought of being an object of someone else’s sexuality might have caused him some disquiet.
Anyway, few people are as challenged, appearance-wise, as he was, and there can’t be many people around with whom someone, somewhere, wouldn’t consider having sex. And even if there are it’s perfectly possible to live without sex (some people even choose it willingly), or without being thought of as physically attractive. On the other hand, a life without respect and affection is hardly worth living, no matter how you look, and attaining those isn’t, or at least shouldn’t be, solely dependent on sex appeal.
Generally I’ve decided whether I want to have sex with you looooong before I’ve gotten close enough to see your penis. If I like you, think you’re a kind wonderful person, then it will work whether you’ve got 2 or 8 inches.
I just can’t imagine a woman falling in love with a man, getting intimate and then saying, “Stop! Your penis is smaller than average. All your wonderful qualities don’t count anymore. Please get dressed and go home.”
I think, as far as attractiveness goes, that merely physical characteristics are more important to people in their 20s and younger. As a guy in my 40s, I can honestly say someone’s looks are possibly the least important factor in my being attracted to them. I’ve dated (in my shallow youth) and known too many “hot chicks” that were horrible or stupid people to make it a priority. If you’re just looking to get laid, I suppose physical attractiveness is enough, but for anything meaningful, the cooler a person someone is, the more attractive they become. Having said that, I, like everyone, still have certain arbitrary standards and prejudices that will prevent me from being physically attracted to someone altogether, but by any vaguely normal standard, personality is what’s going to turn me on, trite as it may sound.
Anecdotal but FWIW I have asked female friends of mine this question and universally they tell me size does not matter unless the man is unusually large or unusually small. Most men fall on the center of the Bell Curve with a few outliers at either side. Exceptionally small they view as a problem and exceptionally large they actually found a little scary (bumping up against their cervix, they tell me, is not comfortable).
They have told me decent size is welcome (and they prefer girth to length) but it is much more about their overall experience with the guy than his size and a well hung guy can be a lousy lay while a guy packing an average member might rock their world. Unless the man is one of the outliers many, many other things will matter more to determine how the whole experience plays out and if the woman finds it enjoyable.
In terms of penis size, average is good. Less than average is less good, and more than average is downright bad. Less than average is less good because it doesn’t feel as good. More than average is bad because it’s painful and unpleasant. I want to gag when I hear men claiming to have big penises, even in jest, because it’s the idea that bigger=better that’s being propagated, even as a joke, and it annoys me.
If the OP thinks one man’s 10 can’t be another man’s 2, on a scale of attractiveness, then he has never been to a reggae club where women you would consider fat and disgusting win 500 dollars and bottles of champagne for their big booty dance; their belly rolls quivering over their belts and their thighs jiggling and shaking.
As far as size is concerned, small is bad, average can be awesome if the man knows what he’s doing and big is grrrreat and huge can be grrrreat if the man knows what’s he’s doing and extra huge is too much. Really. It is. I just…can’t.
The whole penis size thing irritates me. A man can’t really change his size, so he shouldn’t worry about it. If a guy with a little weenie thinks he won’t be able to satisfy a lady, he probably can’t. If a guy with a small weenie thinks he’s an awesome fuck, then he stands a better chance. OTOH, if a guy with a donkey dick thinks he can just show up and women will be satisfied, then he will probably be disappointed.
If a woman doesn’t like me because of my penis size, then she’s not the kind of girl I want to be with anyway. I am insecure about a lot of things, but penis size ain’t one of them, even though I am below or on the low side of average in the hung department.
With general physical attractiveness, confidence goes a long way in making up for it. A “2” with a good 'tude becomes a “4” or even a “5.” A “10” with a stuck up attitude becomes an “8” or “7”, similar to donkey dick dude above.
a female friend of mine married a guy with a huge penis, and one of the reasons for the divorce was the 2 minute sex sessions.
as for looks, I work with young women all the time. some of them are down right stunning to look at, then they open their mouth. its one of those things, stupid is a massive counter to good looks for a hell of a lot of people. on the flip side a girl who at a glance is just sort of average but has a rocking personality is far far hotter than her looks alone would suggest.
Yeah, men tend to obsess over length, but girth is what seems to have an actual impact. The famously over-sized porn stars like John Holmes and Ron “Hedgehog” Jeremy both wound up with a significant portion of their famous appendages remaining outside of whatever vagina they are in. What is the point of more penis than can fit into a vagina?
Let us also remember that size is relative. Just like penises, hoo-hahs come in many variations as well. So ‘‘tiny’’ to one woman might be ‘‘just right’’ to another.
As far as general physical attractiveness, we are biologically influenced to find certain traits attractive - such as symmetry and physical fitness. I don’t, however, believe that the media has no influence whatsoever on what is deemed attractive. Attractiveness is often a collective value judgment.
Personally I’ve fallen for some guys that were less than average in the attractiveness department. I’m probably a 6 and a 7 on a good day. I think my husband is stunning. He thinks I’m a 10. It blows my mind, but you know, that’s love. Love can make anyone into a supermodel through the eye of the beholder.
Sure, a someone with more of the usual “checkmarks” in place overall will have more people of their preferred sex to choose from than one with few checkmarks in place.
I personally have mixed feelings about penises, lol. A large penis, imo, does have a sex star quality about it, maybe like a woman with pornstar-sized breasts. But at the same time, it hurts. Positions and action are limited. He has to always be more careful and might not be able to put it all the way in. Smaller is okay because with kegels a woman can grip it tight anyway, you can romp with him more freely. And g-spot is only a couple of inches in, it works. As someone said, while length has visual appeal, the stretching sensation from extra girth is what feels good, but only to a point. Also, penis is not all there is to sex, and is much less when it comes to who you want to spend your life with. Of course there will always be size queens just as some people have other strong preferences.
I can’t imagine ever passing on a guy just over penis size. It might be equivalent to a man who ditches a woman for being too flat chested, or maybe too loose down there. My guess is plenty of guys would prefer her to be at least average on both counts, but how many would write her off for that alone. Would you?
I think it would be the whole package, which also includes a whole lot of “that indefinable quality.” Also, some of the most unattractive people in the world, physically, mentally, emotionally, financially, etc., ARE paired up, living proof everywhere that even the ones and twos get to play. Also, I feel like most of the ones and twos have things that are under their control to change, if they wanted more partners to choose from badly enough. JMHO
I don’t buy this. I mean, I buy that pussy* comes in different sizes just like penises do, but I don’t buy that a smaller pussy is going to be more satisfied with a smaller penis and larger pussies need larger penises.
The pussy stretches. It can stretch large enough for a baby to go through (although mine hasn’t had one go through it, I’m sure it would stretch that far, also).
So I think it is safe to say most pussies, big and small, can accomodate big or small penises just fine, with the same amount of friction or what have you. It is more likely just a preference for smaller or larger penises that count for most women. I don’t buy that a woman who likes a smaller penis has a smaller pussy.
*I am using the word ‘pussy’ because I don’t like the word ‘hoo ha’ and I don’t feel like some nerd coming in here to specify that the actual vagina isn’t the part that stretches open for the penis and all that jazz.
Well, it’s true that pussies are stretchy. I never really gave it that much thought. I do know that banging on the cervix hurts like hell, and the cervix is pretty much a fixed location. If a woman has a longer vaginal canal it seems like she would be more comfortable with larger penises. I’m not an expert. I just have never been able to understand the fuss about size. It sounds to me like something men worry more than something women worry about. I’ve never known a woman who cared about this. The universal response seems to be, ‘‘it’s all in how he uses it.’’ And I’m inclined to agree.
This is the other question guys want to know about, and no one has yet addressed it in this thread. I know, the real answer is that there’s no one answer, and you have to communicate with your partner and find out what she (or he) likes. Still, it would be interesting to hear some specific examples.