Okay, since I expect this thread to die a relatively quick death now, I need to thank you guys for helping me get over my totally crappy day!
jazzmine–thanks for the nice words (even though you said I was only a tiny percent evil–you’re going to give people the wrong idea about me!)
callie–don’t worry, I haven’t forgotten. There will be an invite, I promise! 
tater–you don’t intend to sleep with me, huh? Well, see if I find you the love of your life again!
And actually, I did consider that you might be an escaped mental patient but only for a brief, brief second, I swear!
Ross–sweet and fair? I swear, I’m going to be Mary Poppins before this thread is finished! Thanks!
Jeannie–“non-evil”? You best behave or I’ll have to send you goofy e-cards again!
Silo–there, there. Keep being a good boy and maybe someday you’ll get your own thread!
Seph–Just for you, I’ll stop whining. But only if you say more nice things about me! It’s the least you can do after grossing me out! 
Serendipity–you know, more people need to worship me from afar. The world would be a much better place for it!
Scotti–Oooh! Hot tub! I think I’ll soak before trying to drown my boss. Good idea, though! (The hitman offer still stands…)
Kricket–Of course I didn’t tell you to shut up and deal–I’m worried about you! And so far as the offer of one of your men goes, I think I’ll have to pass–I’m pretty booked already! 
And as for you, Patrick, I’ll just thank you privately. 