Like guns? Like guitars?
Music for cats!
Screeching distorted guitar wailing interspersed with shotgun blasts. Your cat will love it!
And then there’s…
**Creamsicle kitty likes us
What’s In A Name?
Pet Name Discomfort**
**Boys’ basketball players walk off court in support of cheerleader with Down’s syndrome
The Kid Who Made It**
TWO consecutive feel good stories! Nice…
The downside to legalizing marijuana
Got a promotion! And got SHAFTED!!
Damn you marijuana!
I just saw the 1st sign of Spring
Cinnamon Imp Marries In Secret
Ah, spring, when a young Doper’s fancy turns to thoughts of love!
** animal potty training, Shock blanket?
Download and upload speeds?**
I’m betting on a fast download.
**Help with online dating profile
You’ve been given $15,000 for your Honeymoon. What do you do? **
Okay, the first thing you do is, you mention that on your dating profile…
Show us your computer!
Anyone want to talk to PC remote virus detection techs?
Someone’s breaking into your house with intent to do you and your family harm.
Help, I’m drowning in donated stuff!
“Next…we’ll drop off the big box of secondhand clothes and the complete set of National Geographic…bwa-ha-ha!”
**Solar Eclipse - March 20, 2015
Ask the person who will probably miss seeing a total solar eclipse [Ed. title]
Do you wake up in the night feeling inexplicably and overwhelmingly sad? **
Yes. But it’s not inexplicable. I told you I’ll miss the solar eclipse!
**Design your own Around-the-World Cruise
Hairballs. And puking **
I can hardly…gaaaak…contain myself…errrrrrk…at the thought of all that fun!
**How do people not understand wanting to live in the country?
Emergency Alert System Tests **
Damn sirens are constantly blowing out there in rural America.
Celebrities who have completely vanished
Top Gear’s Clarkson suspended
Unpronouncable (by non locals) town names
Emergency Alert System Tests
Everyone who lives in the town knows that it’s pronounced throatwarbler mangrove.
**Perceptions about USA from non-Americans that Americans might be surprised to learn
Decapitation! **
** Have you ever had a co worker stopped talking to you for no reason?
Decapitation!
**
That’s no excuse.
** Do Any New Cars Still Have The Following?
Mmp! Mmp! Mmp!
**
They don’t build cars like they used to!
** Mmp! Mmp! Mmp!
Spell check fail
**
*Mumps! Mumps! Mumps! *?
** Waco biker war
Saw a man cut in half, everything spilling, alive, alert for a long time…how?**
Well, them Scimitars is tough.
**The Tackiest Thing I’ve Ever Seen
Saw a man cut in half, everything spilling, alive, alert for a long time…how?
**
And, boy, was it tacky!