skimitar:
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learn to spell your nick
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stop being a lurker straightdope wannabe and post on these message boards more
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learn to post on threads <other> than those featured in threadspotting
Nice job, squeegee, starting a thread that got ‘threadspotted’.
However, if this thread is so damned great, why isn’t Collounsbury over here criticising his weak typing skills and potty-mouth? Huh? Why isn’t Anthracite agonizing over her shameful secret career as a WWF wrestler? Why isn’t december lambasting himself for being even-handed occasionally!?!
And you still suck for smoking. Fucking cut it out, shithead.
The Big Cheese, git yer ass in here.
You think you know everything, and if anyone says anything you jump down their throat. Your way behind in school and you waste your time on that Straight Dope shit all the time. WTF??
You couldn’t program your way out of a wet paper bag.
How many times did you go mountain biking last year?? And you are County rep?? ha!
Vegetarian?? Yea, right. I saw you in Big Mikes Subs the other day scarfing down a #4! Why did you post 3 times on ‘Condiments for a Bratwurst’ this week??? well??
Grow up, get married, settle down, how old are you??
lorinada, go on a diet for godsake! And clean up the house every once in awhile! In fact, if you cleaned house more, you would be eating less and moving around more, and both your problems would be solved!
And quit looking down your nose at stupid people! People can’t help being stupid anymore than you can help being smart. Stupid people are probably more valuable to this earth and its societies than smart people are, anyway, because there’s a far greater need for ditch diggers, assembly workers, truck drivers, fast food workers, Walmart cashiers, etc., than there are for rocket scientists and brain surgeons. Not, of course, that all the above are stupid (or smart, depending on which list you are referring to).
And quit spending so much time on this freakin’ computer. These people don’t give a flyin’ rat’s butt about what your opinion is.
I’d flame you, punha, but I have better things to do.
::goes off to watch grass grow::
I could flame you, Anya, but it would be pointless . At least ease up on the soda, and go out and get some sunshine.
Yeah, so first of all, why do you even BOTHER posting to the SDMB, Already in Use? You think you’re so clever, but everyone here is at least twice as clever as you are. I mean, look at your name! You had to choose that stupid username because the five or so others you came up with were ALREADY IN USE!!! Honestly.
Go suck the gonorrhea discharges off a bucket of rotting elephant foreskins. It would be less of a waste of time that what you’re doing now.
Oh yeah, and figure out how to use that Quik-Post thing without messing up a hundred times.
Hey “Darth”, I know who you really are-- Do you think you’re fooling anyone with that phony name? Is that your post count or your I.Q.? And what the fuck made you think you have the right to drunkenly stagger in here and start posting?
I’ve seen a LOT of useless waste of bandwidth here, but you clearly take the cake. Guess who’s going on my ignore list, slapnuts…
Look here, Ms. Porpentine, you’ve got just about EVERYTHING going for you. You’re young, healthy, not starving, and nobody is shooting at you or trying to blow you up. This ALREADY puts you ahead of most of the people in the world. On top of all that, you have a master’s degree, a job you actually like, no major debts, and an affectionate family. Do you realize that this is good luck most people can only dream of? So stop being unhappy, AND GET OVER THE EX ALREADY. It’s been four months, and it wouldn’t make a damn thing better if you heard from him. Sometimes it is not important to ask people why.
Ya know, I’d post something encouraging you people to think better of yourselves, saying something about how much you could contribute to the Board and the world if you’d stop being so down on yourselves for no good reason; maybe I’d flirt with Fretful or joke with skimitar about how we’ve been here the same amount of time but I show my insecurity by posting too much while he’s taken the oposite tack, but this is the Pit so I won’t. I’ll just say, JESUS H. MOTHERFUCKING CHRIST, PEOPLE, CUT THIS OUT!
Shodan, you corpse-felching masturbation addict.
Here is a perfectly clever and original thread, and you sign onto it, and you are so pants-wettingly insecure that you can’t even join in the fun and flame yourself. You post a half-witted failure of a joke and then go back and hit “Refresh” a million times, waiting to see if anyone is wasting thirty seconds reading you. You pathetic scum.
You make me sick. Any one of Polycarp’s posts is worth a dozen of yours. Esprix, jarbabyj, dropzone - you could post until your fingers bled and you would never have anything resembling their style.
Why are you wasting our time? Why don’t you pull your thumb out of the diseased orifice out of which you spew your fascist, hate-mongering political opinions, release the pathetically undersized organ you are so frantically manipulating with the other nail-bitten hand, and unsubscribe from this messageboard, you racist, elitist, judgemental abcess on the rectum of the Internet.
Regards,
Shodan
PS - What a lame rant. You suck.
Flamsterette_X, here is a list of your shortcomings, in no particular order:
Why don’t you go out for a walk or even a light run once in a while? It won’t hurt anything, and maybe that way you will actually lose some weight, instead of complaining about it on occasion to your friends! I mean, it IS actually not raining out, and you could definitely use the exercise, especially since you do need to go grocery shopping for the essentials! (like tonight)
Speaking of losing weight, why don’t you modify your diet to include more of the stuff you should eat (fruit, veggies, meat, etc.) and less of the stuff you shouldn’t? (ice cream, cookies, desserts, etc.)
Stop spending so much time on the computer! Dammit, girl, you’d think that the SDMB and ICQ were your freakin’ life or something! Yes, you do get off the computer occasionally to make phone calls or actually go out with your friends, but you can surely put most of your weekdays to better use than sitting on your ass in front of the computer screen! (like anyone on ICQ or the SDMB really cares about what you have to say, anyhow)
Try calling your friends a little more often, eh? Remember when you used to call a bunch of them every Thursday night? Huh? So why don’t you do that anymore? Is it because you’re so obsessed with your online “life” (or lack of one) that you can’t take the time to call people who are your friends in real life? Sure, it’s not your fault if Shannon’s phone is always busy, or if Nina is never in, or if Elizabeth is always lying down or sick, but you could make a little more effort! (calling Elizabeth at the funeral home is not always a good idea, you know… she has to WORK!)
Speaking of work, why don’t you actually make more of an effort to find some? You always tell your friends that you’re looking for work (or that time in November you told Connie you were thinking of going back to school)… why don’t you actually get off your lazy butt and do something about it?
That wasn’t even as vitriolic as you can get… why don’t you make it a little more Pit-worthy next time? Evil freak!
JESUS CHRIST you freekin’ HOG!!
Did you just eat 2 pieces of Strawberry ShortCake, and then use a third piece of cake to mop up the left over whip cream?!?!?
I’m thinking of a word, and the word is Shwank.
Yarwitz, you are, without a doubt, the worlds biggest idiot. Why do you keep falling for his crap time after fucking time? you have a husband. hes a good provider. he doesnt hit you. ok so maybe he doesnt like sex and doesnt want to kiss you or even hug you. theres millions of people all over the world who have it way worse than you. why do you keep believing nats shit over and over. do you think so little of yourself to keep falling for it? dont you have any self respect? he treats you like shit. hes always so concerned for himself and doesnt give a moments thought to your feelings. and its on the internet for fucks sake. you’ve never even met him. youve never even met him. how can someone i’ve never even met have such a huge incredible hold on me? whats wrong with you, look at yourself, look at your life. youve waisted a whole year on him, move on for fucks sake. hes a big boy, he can take care of himself, he doesnt need you. as much as you tell yourself he does, he mustnt. why would he do the things he does if he needs you. and this sa crap has got to stop. you have to force yourself to have a life. nothing bad is going to happen to you if you go out. stop moping around the house and do something you pathetic shit. if you dont like how you look do something about it. stop wishing year after year after fucking year that you were different. what do you expect, you pathetic crap. you are a pathetic excuse for a life. look at people who are paralised and go on to do something like compete in a marathon. what do you do? nothing you useless shit. no wonder charles doesnt want to touch you, who would. stop crying you baby. no one cares. no one will even read this. and if they did they would laugh at what a pathetic loser you are. if you died they wouldnt even know. for fucks sake dont talk to him anymore. have some self control. tell him to fuck off once and for all and be done with it. i hate you yarwitz. why dont you fuck off while youre at it.
OK, now I regret starting this thread.
I’m sorry you’re having a tough time, yarwitz. I can tell that almost all the other self-whipping here was in a humorous vein, and obviously yours was not. I apologise for whatever this thread did to contribute. I hope you can find the strength to both forgive yourself and stop being so unforgiving towards yourself. I know you deserve it.
OK, now I regret starting this thread.
I’m sorry you’re having a tough time, yarwitz. I can tell that almost all the other self-whipping here was in a humorous vein, and obviously yours was not. I apologise for whatever this thread did to contribute. I hope you can find the strength to both forgive yourself and stop being so unforgiving towards yourself. I know you deserve that.
(damn, submitted twice changing one word. Bleah. I guess I still suck… 
)
I do that too… so don’t worry about i!
Oops, I meant “it”…
Pravnik:
Well, well. I finally get the chance to address you in a public forum and open up outr little internal dialouge to the world. My only reservation: where do I start with you?
I guess here; you’ve got them all fooled pretty well, don’t you? Guess what? Not me. You are a FUCKING PHONY. Your entire personality is a mask. Peel that away and there’s another front. Keep peeling, like the layers of an onion. Eventually there’s nothing, just a desire to make a show for others, to impress everyone else. Vainty and shallowness defined.
You have some classmates who think you’re a smart guy, although not as half as smart as you’d desperately like to convince you and everyone else you are to prove some pitiable self worth. So you smugly play humble at the same time you play up to hat you hope everyone thinks of you. What about today, smart guy? This isn’t some classroom where you can impress someone with a memory trick, this is REAL LIFE. If your clinic director hadn’t covered for your ass and filed the motion on time, several hundred people would have had their lawsuit to stop the landfill from being built next to their homes dismissed because you got drunk and played around because the smart guy can always pull it off later, can’t he? Doesn’t sound too smart to me. Sounds like a guy who believes his own bullshit.
Basically, you’re irresponsible. Being messy and irresponsible for yourself is bad enough; what happens once you graduate and are supposed to be responsible for other people? I’ll tell you. Fuck up like you did today and there are DISBARRMENT PROCEEDINGS. There are LAWSUITS. There are LIVES FUCKED UP BECAUSE OF YOU. Which I don’t doubt will happen, because I see problems with you beyond angst-ridden self doubt bullshit, more like something I like to call There Is Something Seriously Fucked Up With You.
To begin with, you’re afraid. You’re afraid to fail, you’re afraid to suceed. You’re filled with bravado but you won’t go get an AIDS test. You were afraid to answer your phone today! You do that quite a bit aren’t you? Why? Don’t quite know, do you?
So, it seems to me, you try to attach onto anything you can to ignore that fear, like vanity. Go ahead, check yourself out in the mirror endlessly and keep telling yourself you’re cute like a boy band. I see who you’re really talking to. A coke-bottled, buck-toothed high school clown who didn’t graduate high school on time because he/you failed nearly every class he set his foot in that you can see a liiiiitle bit underneath the mirror, can’t you? Does it make you feel good now to look in the mirror and convince yourself you’re cute and smart? Does that give you self-worth? Do you know how pathetic that sounds? Can’t you attach some self worth somewhere else? Answer: no, because There is Something Seriously Wrong With You.
Could you get a little more drunk a little more often please, and have a little more meaningless unsafe sex? Oh I’m sorry, you can’t, can you? Ever think about the people you may hurt? Ever think about looking a little more like a fool? Ever think about STD’s? About anything? Anything?
Any of the consequences of any action you take?
Let me ask you this: is there anyone now dead that might be alive had you never been born?
pravnik,
I hate your fucking guts.
Fuck You.