The Haiku rant thread

EddyTeddyFreddy
not necessarily true,
just x-y-x is good

Damn kids these days! Why
Muck about with tradition?
Get off of my lawn!

:mad: :mad: :mad:

It’s not a haiku
Unless it refers to the
Passing of seasons.

Passing of seasons?
Sounds like someone ate too much
At the Tex-Mex place.

I’m not pissed enough at anything right now to rant, but I just wanted to nominate this one as my favorite so far.

Damn those refried beans!
My undies are history.
Plus, it’s nearly fall.

Now that’s a haiku,
Bitches! Incidentally,
Summer’s almost gone.

Your story and mine
are freakishly similar
my car needs repairs

I still have loaner
“today” became “tomorrow”
Need to buy more gas.

:frowning:

You win.

Good lord, that nearly
made me vomit with delight.
Is mine Senryu?

I watched them dig up
our sidewalks all last summer:
new service coming!

My area code:
fiber optic internet
unavailable.

Confrontational
freak. Trust me - Y Chromosone
doesn’t make you right.

Fresh separation.
I miss my daughter so much.
Will my wife come back?

She probably won’t.
Guess I’ll get used to hot dogs.
Still miss my daughter.

Killer confuses
Wait. John Mark Karr not guilty?
DNA all wrong.

Media fuckers
The case is still unsolved, and
you are stupidheads.

Damn SDMB!
Always delays and time outs
When I try to post.

Shop guy tells penguin:
“It looks like you blew a seal.”
“Did NOT! We’re just friends.”

Then penguin looks down.
“Oh! I see now what you mean.
This is tartar sauce.”

Crap, those weren’t rants. Sorry, folks - here you go.

Winter turns to spring.
Still I wait in solitude
for the damned plumber.

or…

Leaves fall from the trees.
Grab your rake and curse the leaf
That just will NOT fall.

Meh, a good haiku
doesn’t artificially
break up sentences

You want to throw down?
Your meter must flow freely
Like fresh spring rain, bitch.

O, bathroom pooper
Your stench doth nauseate me
Courtesy flush, please

Don’t make me beat you
Like a red-headed stepchild.
Dude! Winter’s coming!

How the seasons pass.
But the maiming I inflict
Will remain always.

Yesterday is gone
Like the warmth of summertime.
Bitch, I will cut you!