Never to late! Keep 'em coming! Very funny! Writing in fragments! Must stop now!
From my namesake:
The Eleventh Commandment:
Thou shalt not get caught.
I try to live, mainly, by that one 
LL
True, evilbeth, too true.
Okay, I forgive you.
Evil is good, after all. 
[/end hijack]
How bout “Evil will always triumph, because good is dumb”
Well, maybe not a commandment, exactly. But it could be one of your fundamental beliefs…
Thou shalt not emulate William Shatner.
Going to the restroom (#2) shall hitherforeto be known as “taking a Shatner”.
Hey man fuck, I’m a minister too.
–Tim
That’s gotta be one huge can of beer to effect a full submersion.
Rule #1 from our high school OM team would make a good commandment here: “If you didn’t get caught, it didn’t happen.”
Thout shall not step on flaccid manatees.
Can we get rid of the “up to” part?