The SDBM "One Trick Pony" Chowder and Marching Society: The Englebert Incident!

Another chapter in the continuing SDBM “One Trick Pony” Chowder and Marching Society saga:

Sweet Willy: …and so, I conclude that

Everyone else (in unison): …Jews suck :rolleyes:

Father John: Yes Willy. Father John knows you think Jews suck. Even Father John is sick of hearing how much you hate Jews.

Sweet Willy: Did I mention that Jews made the Nazis hate them?

K-K: Yes! YEs! WE GET IT!!

Sweet Willy: Because I have some theories on Jews…

< Before KK can strangle Willy, there’s a timid knock on the door. Deeward sticks his head inside >

Deeward: Hi. I’m disgusted by the fact that everyone doesn’t love Englebert Humperdink. Is this where one of the twenty-seven billion Englebert Humperdink fan clubs meets?

KK: No, but c’mon in anyway, Big Fella. Would you like to get a blow-job?

Deeward: What?!

KK (thinking quickly): Englebert Humperdink wants you to get a blow-job!

Deeward: What? He does? Oh. Ok!
(He begins to unzip his pants)

Jack Dean Tyler: Hey, KK: find out if he’s circumcized.

Deeward (rapidly rezips): What?

Sweet Willy (muttering): What kind of a name is Humperdink anyway? It sounds Jewish.

Father John: So tell Father John about this Englebert fella. Does he drive an SUV?

Deeward: I…don’t know. But he has the largest fan club in the world.

KK: Really? I’d love to see his “fan club”. Especially if it’s so large.

Jack Dean Tyler: His “fan club” probably isn’t circumcised if it’s so large. Circumcision takes at least 4 inches off the penis!

Deeward: Yo…you’re listening to me? And you’re not using four letter words?

Sweet Willy: As long as you’re not a Jew (did you know that Jews suck?), I’ll be happy to hear what you have to say!

Deeward: I love Englebert! His name is like…like…well, say it loud and there’s music playing. Say it soft and it’s almost like praying: Englebert Humperdink! Did you know that some people claim that Englebert is unattractive? I think they’re just jealous, since he’s a stud-muffin! He has a lot of female fans. And not just old yukky ones either.

KK: Does he like getting blow-jobs from his fans?

Deeward: “Blow” and “Jobs” are four letter words. They make Englebert cry.

KK (thinking fast again): Um…“oral” no. Hmmm…Does he like “mouth-penis sex?”

Deeward: I bet he does!

(Fade out)

Fenris, who risked life and limb to get these transcripts!


Your bravery inspires us all.

Fenris, I hope you know that this little skit brightened my day to the point that no one must suffer my horrible wrath until at least 10:30am. The world thanks you.

That Englebert Humperdink thread gave me the whim-whams.



Now you owe me a new Ethelbert Humperdoodle coffee mug!

So that Engelbert Dude wasn’t taking the piss? Oh my.

After barbers finish cutting your hair, they show you it in a mirror and ask you if it’s alright.

Why do they do this?

It’s not like they can put it all back on and start again if you don’t like it.

What, Lolo didn’t make this meeting! I’m not impressed.

(That’s “I’m not impressed with Lolo.” Fenris is ALWAYS impressive)

Omigod! That was really fuckin’ funny! Fenris, you’re my new favorite poster. :slight_smile:

HA! :smiley:

Wouldn’t KK rather choke a Willy?

Fenris, you get the George Cross for bravery mate! You take care out there, y’hear? The Hump and Dick Gremlins will be out to get you now…

Feh. Fatherjohn’s name is one word, not two. You haven’t been doing your research, Fenny.