How about a regular sized one?
I’ll play bass along with you. Foggy Mountain in G? Bonnie & Clyde escape music.
I know woodworking, dabble in general repair/ problem solving. I can drive a bus or van.
I can be the angry guy on the team. I’m good at that.
I vote Dopey Dozen.
I’m really useful! I can read all of our health insurance policy to make sure… wait, what? We’re not insured? Fine!
Um, okay, I can bring a really big, mean cat who will go through soldiers like butter if it means he gets a can of wet food. He’s like a furry cannonball with teeth. And he’s deaf, so alarms and explosions won’t bother him!
I’m sure you already have a pilot, but I can fly a single-engine airplane, complete with excellent flight-planning and navigation skills.
Have your own personal glider, or access to one? Need to know how many paratroopers it can carry, or how much cargo, and best glide ratio/speed! Call me if you need other pilots for the fleet. Have access to fleet of gliders I could hijack, but will need stealth tow planes and pilots.
I can also help train the kamikaze dolphins.
ETA:
Okay, we have our tow pilot.
I am opposed to kamikaze dolphins!
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whitetho I’ll need you to meet at the abandoned quarry at 2am tonight. Urgent heist business to discuss. Tell no-one of this.
Since it seems like beer supplies are going to be tight I am willing to be paid in top of the line GeForce graphics cards.
I’m more of an ideas guy, you know ?
I have a low instinct for self-preservation.
The Cecil Adams Affair
I’m familiar with some great fences - Barb Wire, Shayne Link, Split Rail, Pointed Picket, for a few.
The Usual Dopers
Reservoir Dopes
Doped Fiction
Ocean’s Millions (or Teeming Eleven)
I’m very good at pretending to be a slightly posh British person, which is a surprisingly helpful skill. Also, as an experienced journalist, I’ve got very good information-gathering and research skills.
And I can drive a right-hand drive car, which might be helpful if this heist takes place nearly anywhere in what used to be the British Empire. 
I crack under pressure if the police ask tough questions as “Did you do it?”
Probably best for the role of the poor guy who dies quickly.
The Doper Job
You know I’m pretty unlucky. I could be the guy that gets assigned one simple thing to do (like keep a charming young heiress distracted) but it goes wrong (say, her old boyfriend unexpectedly shows up and wants to get something he left behind in the vault) and the Plan starts to unravel. I could surely do that.
Organic chemist here. Do we have a well-equipped lab?
iiandyiiii’s Dopers
iiandyiiii’s Nighty-Eight (or however many. This is the 98th thread post so far.
Inglourious Dopars
I am an overweight middle-aged woman. Virtually invisible in any circumstances.
I have an authoritative voice which cows all but the truest narcissists.
And there’s what my friends and co-workers refer to as “The eyebrow powers.” If your Mother had them, you know what I mean.
I am an excellent sniper. I am also a Quaker, so I won’t kill anyone, but I can be bent to the use of tranquilizing darts.
I remain preternaturally calm in emergencies, only falling apart after it’s all over and dealt with. A formidable ability in tight corners.
There are a few other skills I learned in my early career. I could tell you, but then I’d have to . . . use them. 
Cecil’s Angels?