And I’ll bet the nice living room has plastic slip covers over all the furniture. And those plastic rug runners so the carpet doesn’t get all dirty.
Rue I bet God makes everybody take off their shoes before they even come in his house. I mean, God would always just have freshly mopped/waxed floors right? Would God have a Mother Angel standing right beside the front door saying, “Alright Mister! This floor just got mopped and/or waxed! You take off those shoes right now! Do you think all I have to do is clean up after you?”
Ok, see, here’s what gets me. Why would God need a refrigerator? (And why does fridge get a ‘d’, but refrigerator doesn’t?) Why wouldn’t God be able to simply think of what He wants and have it materialize in front of Him, at the peak of freshness and flavor? Isn’t He omnipotent? Wouldn’t He be able to go, “Hmmm, I’m in the mood for some Coq au Vin, with maybe a nice Chardonnay and mango/shoe polish ice cream for dessert.”, and have it all appear before Him, laid out to perfection, at the perfect temperature, the perfect blend of seasonings and the right amount of sauce? Why would God’s ice cream melt?
As per the OP Winnie, there’s no “d”. But it does get an apostrophe. Unless that’s some other speck of punctuation. ('Frige) But “fridge” does look better, and since it rhymes with “bridge” it just seems best to spell it the same way.
Have you ever eaten ice cream, but instead of spooning the bites up one at a time, you stir and stir the ice cream until it gets all mooshy? Maybe God would like His ice cream like that once in a while. That’s why His ice cream would melt. So it could get mooshy.
-Rue. (mooshy)
I’m afraid I am too tired to expound on the theological implications of god’s fridge. But I wanted to say I like this thread very much. I like this thread very much. There you go.
I once saw a church sign that read “God is calling you,” so I figure God must have a telephone as well as a refrigerator. And he’s calling me (and probably you, too) but not leaving any messages. I thought those were telemarketers, but I guess I was mistaken. It’s God! I’m afraid to find out why he’s calling, though. What if I pick up the phone and hear a sepulchral voice saying “Pupshaw! It’s time…to clean the refrigerator!” And then I’d be scared–does he mean my refrigerator, or the Celestial Refrigerator? In either case, it’d be scary.
Anyway, on my refrigerator, I have magnets with pictures of my cats in them. The vet gave them to me when I first brought my cats in. They have “Welcome to our family” and the vet’s name and phone number printed on them. And a little heart-shaped cutout with polaroids of the cats showing through. So I think that’s what God’s magnets look like. Not that he needs 'em to remember our phone numbers; he just likes the way they look.
Maybe when we get to heaven, we also get to wear a little tag that says “If found, please call God” and God’s phone number on it. But I don’t know what God’s phone number is, because he doesn’t leave me any messages.
Pupshaw. you must post more often!! You cracked me up! You also got me to wondering if the “BLOCKED NUMBER” that shows up on my Caller ID might just be God. I won’t answer blocked calls.
Rue, I think I have figured you out. You are obviously some great religious teacher come to teach us, your followers, the mysteries of the universe. You are not a young man with two children and a wife living in 21st-century America. You are, in fact, a Tibetan priest, sitting cross-legged in your saffron robe and posting to us with the wisdom you have gained through hundreds of reincarnations.
The OP was a koan. In fact, all your MMPs are koans.
Am I right? Did I get it? Of course, you could still be a young man with two children and a wife and be a great teacher.
This is my long-winded way of saying, “You’re so clever, Rue!”
The sign that I have always remembered read, "The only thing you miss by not being Christian is heaven" which, despite not being a Christian, struck me as a very ** unChristian** thing to say.
I wonder if God keeps his take-out food menus on the fridge or just shoves them in the drawer next to His silverware.
And how come Rue doesn’t have his own nationaly syndicated column? I bet if he did, God’s mom would cut them out on a regular basis and mail them to her son.
I bet God just took His4Ever’s picture off the fridge. It’s prolly stuck on the side of the microwave right now. :rolleyes:
Speaking of God’s telephone, I remembered this one while reading Pupshaw’s post. <Aside to Pupshaw, I agree with FCM you must post more often.> Anyway, back to telephones… I was at a funeral and there was this flower arrangement ( a wreath, it being a funeral and all). The wreath was arranged around this big styrofoam thing made to resemble a rotary phone (for all you young dopers, there was a time when you had to actually stick your finger in this rotary thing and dial the telephone number. I remember that from my kid days.) and in the middle of the phone was the phrase “Jesus Called.” I made a friend promise that there will be one of those at my funeral.
And now for my weekly… POOL UPDATE
Concrete guys poured the concrete around the pool today. Plumbing guy hooked up all the plumbing! Electrician guy is coming tomorrow to hook up electrical stuff, put in the two outside outlets I want at the pool and wire up the storage building. Fence lady, however, is a big poopyhead! She did not show up as promised. I called and she did not call back. So, the pool guy and I cooked a deal for him to do my fence. He’s good. I know this cause I know somebody he did a privacy fence for and it looks good. So, we’re going to Lowe’s and get the material, which I’ll buy and he’ll put up the fence.
One yuck thing… the cement truck caved in part of my septic tank. They got too close with the truck full of cement. No problem though, they’re paying to pump out my septic tank, fix it and recap it. My life is just full of excitement this past coupla weeks.
When everything gets done, I’ll take pictures and post em so everybody can ooh and ahh over my loverly pool. Won’t that be nice?
-swampbear (still not smoking and finally bout to have a pool)
I always figured it was an abbreviated version of “Frigidaire” although that wouldn’t explain the spelling either. My grandmother always said Frigidaire as a generic for any refrigerator. She never said ice box. But there are some people who still say ice box. To me an ice box is an insulated compartment in a boat where you put ice and perishables - kinda like a built-in cooler. We don’t have an ice box. We have a little fridge. But it’s not a Frigidaire. I don’t know what brand it is. But it does have 2 doors - a shrunk-down version of a regular size fridge. It’s cute, see?
Why swampbear… I made a call one one of them rotary type phones just last week! Grandma has one on her desk because she could hear better over the rotary phones since the electronics or something in the newer phones played havoc with her hearing aids!
It’s a 37’ motorsailer. We installed the air conditioning ourselves - actually, it’s a heat pump. But my husband is living aboard in Baltimore - he’d roast in the summer without AC.
I need to post the pics of the finished product. I have them - I need to crop and post them.
Oh, and we don’t have anything on the fridge on the boat. No magnets, no photos, no nothing.
