Ummm, MC, I WEAR a bra amd I can’t unhook it with one hand!
I can unhook a bra with my mouth, no hands!!! A talent I love to show off. 
Thanks very much, Kellibelli. Granted I haven’t been particularly tactful in this topic (or others in these forums), I like to think that * somehow * something I said here elicited a tactful answer from someone not wanting to make a joke, when I didn’t want a joke.
I have no doubt that I have been missing something. But these days, feminism awareness being what it is–and Lord knows the women in my family have suffered immensely because of callous men–I certainly do feel a sense of guilt, real or imagined, about ordinarily male heterosexual feelings, because of, well, you might call it * Weltschmerz:* so many men have wronged women I rarely have the courage to be even merely social, lest I become guilty of the same thing.
(I knew a girl in high school who was, and is, a knockout. She has divorced more than once–and I told her mother, a yard customer of mine, that I was outraged enough about the way this undeserving husband of her daughter had acted, I felt like conking him over the head with a skillet!! Justice was rendered without that, however–this now *ex-*husband of hers is alone and probably without friends, a home, or money.)
Kellibelli, I wish I knew personally some women of your nature; I might be less predisposed to complain abnout bed slats squeaking.
nudge nudge
Psst… Hey Doug? I think kellibelli likes you, man…
hell, he can read, and he works…who knows?
Really though, he is obviously an intelligent and sensitive man.
Dougie, your princess is out there, go find her.Boy, is she gonna be pleased!
Oh! I just read doiugie’s profile…old movies!
Have you seen Splendour in the Grass?
On the Waterfront?
A Streetcar Named Desire?
Casablanca…?
I love those, I rent them to watch by myself, cause I dont know anyone else who likes them!
You might try WD40.
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- I can’t recommend it. It chafes after ten minutes or so, and it tastes awful. - MC
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- But seriously folks, WD-40 is a rust preventitive, not a lubricant. - MC
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MC: WD-40 not a lubricant? That’s news to me, plus a few million people who’ve been using it on hinges, guns, and the like for decades. (It also prevents rust, of course.)
K-B: Love those old movies. “Penny Serenade” (I confess) gets to me. As for newer movies, have you ever seen “Robin & Marian”? The final scene never fails to get to me.
penny serenage…cant place the title.
Robin & marion- is that the one with sean connery? havnt seen it, but I will check it out now.
Have you seen Deliverance?
How 'bout Butch Cassidy and The Sundance Kid…classics!!
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- WD-40 is not a lubricant, and furthermore, if used, it tends to wash away other lubricants. IIRC the main ingredient is kerosene.
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- Generally speaking, among liquid lubricants, the ones that are thickest work best and WD-40 runs pretty thin. - MC
Hey, I’m sorry if my joking around slammed you. I didn’t mean to.
The moon looks on many flowers, the flowers on but one moon.
Omni, for a rocket scientist, you’ve got some pretty interesting talents. For the record, I can tie a cherry stem (like from the maraschino cherries they put in drinks) in a knot with my tongue. I guess this would be filed under the “Useless Tricks” category.
Onto the subject at hand: Dougie, have you thought about getting involved in some clubs or such that deal with your interests? That’s always a good, non-threatening way to meet people. It’s good that you’ve been aware of how the women in your family have been treated; you’ll make some woman a wonderful partner. 50? You’re only 1/2 way there!
Bunny, the cherrie stem trick is an old favorite of mine. Bartending you get to develop these talents. Funny how that trick turns into the perfect pick up line at 1 AM, using no words and works for both sexes!
As for my talents…lets just say that I enjoyed college, and didn’t miss out much 
Hey, Bunny or Omniscient. Will you teach me to do the cherry stem trick? I’ve always wanted to know how to do that.
Impressed with and in awe of both of you -
Leslie
whose tongue is in excellent shape
I can undo my wife’s bra with one hand, but I would be afraid to try it with my mouth, might get hurt that way.
Still don’t know how to do the cherry stem.
Doug, there is no shame in remaining a virgin, I applaud your convictions. In my opinion sex is only good when you share it with someone you truly love, not just someone you say “I love you” to. If you want to you will find the right person for you.
Jeffery
Bunny-
I like you more everyday! Its a shame I moved outta Michigan!
Dougie_Monty: [[I certainly do feel a sense of guilt, real or imagined, about ordinarily male heterosexual feelings, because of, well, you might call it Weltschmerz: so many men have wronged women I rarely have the courage to be even merely social, lest I become guilty of the same thing.]]
You can’t let yourself think that way, Dougie. If you buy into the idea of collective guil, the whole human race should drink poisoned Kool-Aide and leave the planet for the cockroaches.
I realize there are people out there who push notions like this–the whole Andrea Dworkin “all male-female sex is rape” thing–but it’s a load of crap. You are responsible for what YOU do, not for what others may have done in the past. And considering your hypersensetivity about it, I doubt there would be much chance of you doing that which you worry about.
You really should look into therapy, man. Not because you have to go out and be the make-out king of the local singles bars–if you’re satisfied with your life, then don’t change it. But carrying a load of guilt for what you’ve never done just ain’t good for you.
As for squeeks…WD40 is SO a lubricant. Use it on beds, on fans, on mice–you name it.
Rich Barr
massivemaple@hotmail.com
AOL Instant Messenger: Hrttannl
I think WD-40 could really help here.