And since I’m the financial supporter of this mission, I’ll provide everyone with:
–Military Hummers for everyone, complete with the civilian package so we will still have all our necessary comforts of life. Like 6 disc CDchangers with an Infinity Sound System, heated leather seats for those cold nights.
And for the desert terrain, neat little dune buggies, both vehicles will be packing large calibur machine guns, GPS so us westerners won’t get lost in the desert.
–As for standard issue weapons, I personally would like AK-47 cammondo style (the one’s without the tacky looking wood), although personal requests for specific weapons will be granted.
–Already noted we have a driver for the tank (and yes TheOtherOne you can have a flamethrower too), maybe we should get a couple more Abriam models. Anyone else want to drive a tank with really big guns??
Am I forgetting anything?
–Wait we forgot a position, we need a team of the sexiest doctors and nurses, to tend to use just in case we get hurt. Do we have anyone with medical experience??
*“Ouch”, I think I need a nurse I just hit my funny bone please “nurse come quick kiss it and make it feel all better”[i/]
Well, I’m going to be a long-shooter. Anything under a mile out is fair game. Anything inside 1,000 yards is a certain kill.
With a pistol, inside 100 yards, same story.
I’ll be the spirited, yet salty guy that doesn’t know the locals, but quickly brings tham around to his side and enlists their help and uses them as guides. 'Course, this means I also end up with the beautiful local woman and we have a torrid affair.
tisiphone, we may have to split the communications officer duties as I work for a satellite phone company and can supply us with high speed internet connections via satellite (handy when you’re in the middle of a Third World nation who’s phone system is circa 1865), so that we can post our exploits to the SDMB as they happen! (I can even set the system up so that we can beam back footage of us in action in real time!)
Does this mean we get to visit you in your hospital room and make meaningful, sympathetic eye contact after your penis falls off from the hideous disease you contract from making love to her.
I’d like to be the no-name, locally ethnic, shorter-than-the-marquee-heroes shopkeeper who runs the cavernous but warmly-lit junk-shop with the cozy tea toom in the back behind the tattered velvet curtains that you can only get to by walking past the cages of screeching monkeys and colorful macaws, where I let you in only after loudly insisting in broken English that I know nothing nothing I am only shopkeeper you want nice dagger I have rubies you look very red very nice, but after the other locals walk out I whisper very low *come back here I tell you something *and in the little tea room, after shooting a sorrowful, resilient gaze at the incense-smoldering shrine with the faded sepia photo of my murdered wife, murdered by a Taleban mob for accidentally letting the wind blow up the sleeve of her burkha, thus exposing her arm and violating the tenets of Taliban Islam–oh the horror! Allah why do you not show mercy–I inform you that bin Laden has a secret operations base in the Valley of Ashkrahalamalagag, which you can only find with this parchment map which I have risked death for so long just by having in my possession, in a hand-hammered copper-plated jewel box under the largest of the monkey cages, my most prized possession except for the precious amulet of Salaam-Bagreezabethilet, which I give you for protection.
Later, my corpse is seen hanging from a lampost. Whoever has my amulet (volunteers?) clutches it tightly, and salutes me.
It’s the Good Muslim walk-on role. Required by SAG rules.
Sigh I think I’m best for the “redshirt” part. I’m a jack of all trades sort - able to do a lot of different things, but none of them outstandingly well.
Well sniper no. 3 signing in, perhaps we need to form our own sub unit. If it’s standing stock still at 50m and some one has rememberd to put out all the wind flags you can choose which eye you want me to hit.
No prob. Let me see, a sleeveless leather jumpsuit oughtta do it nicely, with hmmmm… the garnet choker and earrings, I think. Oh, and mustn’t forget the boots - the ones with the four-inch spike heels.
But punches? Isn’t that…terribly declasse? Can’t I use something small, sharp and shiny? Like needles, all coated with different poisons. We can leave the big, sharp, and shiny for Mnementh.
Works for me, Tuckerfan. I’ll be your backup, in case we have to go through the Third World equipment. After all, that’s what we’re using here. [sub]yeah, I have remnants of a cordboard somewhere, what’s it to ya![/sub]
-hardygrrl-
your so thoughtful, you know I knew I had some reason for transporting that jacuzzi tub all the way over here.
aww…this water feels great, there’s plenty of room in here, and it will make giving me that sponge bath so much easier.
