Nah. If you want a tiara, talk to Dork. He buys them by the case. If you ask nicely, he’ll even throw in a cape.
~VOW
I’d just be awful. Terrible. Even in my non-political posts here I often seem to wind people up without trying, and after a very long tenure as a member people are often still surprised that I’m female, which is how memorable I am.
Apart from the fact that, for understandable reasons due to current mods needing to sleep and reports often coming in at times when US residents are usually sleeping, they particularly want people outside the US, I’m not sure what from the sticky thread (this one https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/announcement.php?f=4) would make you think that.
These are the requirements, from TubaDiva’s post:
A working brain of at least average capacity.
An ability to read and write coherently.
Discernment without being judgmental.
A basic understanding of how This Place Works.
The time to spend being our own little Hall Monitors.
Previous message board or other similar experience is helpful. Including cat wrangling and commando training.
Some wit and style would also be welcomed. Cruelty-free variety.
The understanding that while you may rule, more importantly, you must serve.
The patience of Job.
Don’t think that says no straight white males unless you have a really low opinion of straight white males.
The goat always won, and we got stuck paying his tab.
As much as I would love to help out - and I would - i can’t think of a single board controversy where I came out on the popular side. I seem to have a very different definition of civility/jerkishness than the majority of the board. Plus, as I am occasionally reminded, I’m just SUCH a newbie. 
If I became a mod there would probably be a general revolt by half the users. So…no.
I wrote tongue in cheek, the problems are obvious 
But still… 
I was a mod on a BBS at work. Our biggest concerns were software piracy (posting zip and rar files) and porn. We occasionally had to step in and end flame wars. BBS were the wild west compared to today’s boards.
I wouldn’t have the time or patience to enforce SDMB rules. They’re too nuanced and I don’t always recognize when someone is being a jerk.
I was twice invited to be a mod a few years back and was deeply honored to be asked, but was - and still am - just too damn busy to do it right. So I declined, with some regret.
A wise and well-reasoned policy.