Thanks for the tips! I have apartmentmates who love to get wasted, and they’ll go gaga over these Fun Party Tricks[sup]TM[/sup]!
Also stay away from jimmies, or for you freaks who don’t know a jimmy when you see them, “sprinkles” (the little rainbow things you put on icecream). They burn.
I think, perhaps, the fact that I know this is TMI enough for me.
Coldfire, Unclebeer, and the rest of the moderators are right. This is a sick sick thread, and every doper who has posted a story in here should burn in hell for all eternity.
You all disgust me to my very core.
Probably! 
It’s like I’ve been saying:
We need a Hell Dopefest.
Unfortunately, it’d be nearly impossible to nail down a date for the whole thing. And what if we all ended up in different parts of Hell?
Why doesn’t someone start a thread with the intention of analysing the whole “electronic extroversion” thing? That’s a term I picked up from Psychology Today earlier in the year along with liquid extroversion which is a term that describes the lack of inhibition that results from drinking alcohol. Are Spoofey and his computer getting little drunk on anonymity? Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Who is getting hurt by it? Does it matter? If it’s so bad where’s the 12 step programme? And so on and so on.
By the way: When my brother used to surf he got the Australian Tracks magazine which had a health column for guys written by “Dr Bob”. I saw stuff in there that makes Spoofey and co seem quite tame. Really.
Definitely not. There isn’t anything I haven’t posted on this message board that I wouldn’t say straight to your face in real life.
And keep in mind that my brother DOES give me strange looks.
I must admit that I laughed out loud when I read your response. The bit about the magical fairyland really cracked me up.
Ok, someone asked whether my wife gave me BJ’s, the answer is yes (thank GOD) but she doesn’t enjoy the taste of spunk. It’s not very pleasant from what i understand.
Next
How can you, in your right mind, stick something up your penis? Oh my God. Just thinking about it gives me an involuntary contraction. Much like the anus, that is an exit, not an entrance.
I don’t get it, isn’t masterbation enough for you? Why do people feel the need to jam something into their various openings?
To get back to the OP…
When I was about 15, I had a female cousin offer me a blow job in exchange for eating her out. She’d never had it done, and wanted to know how it felt. I seriously considered it, but didn’t do it.
Curiosity. You’d be surprised how interesting the inner-penile regions feel. And since I never used anything wider than the actual pee-hole, there’s no “stretching” going on.
I passed a kidney stone once. That was enough of feeling the inside of my inner-penile regions, as they tried to jettison themselves from my body.
I was a child masochist. I don’t know how little kids get that way so young but there you go. The feelings I had weren’t the below the waist sort but they were just as intense in emotional terms. I used to get in the back of my parents’ car and pretend it was an oven. I used to love it if other children would play the Hansel and Gretel game and “burn me alive”. There was an English television series on at the time about Robin Hood. Every week Robin seemed to get thrown in a dark dungeon and chained up and tortured. God, I loved that so much. I also got off on cowboy chaps in a major way. Teachers used to use straps and canes in those days to punish children. That whole thing used to fascinate me although I never got hurt myself. I was a sick child but by eight I had gotten over it. In the interests of redeeming the “extroversion” thing: is there anybody else who was a child masochist?
Best thread in a long, long time. I haven’t laughed so much in ages. I can’t add any spice to the mix, but I’d just like to buy all the major contributors a drink. And oldscratch, what can any of us say? You promised to win, you delivered. All hail, Master of TMI.
Ya pansies!
I mean, geeeeez…if you need a woman to do a man’s job…
Believe her, she’s got the tools (aka: BPoD.)
I swear I wasn’t going to do this but I can’t control myself. I have to confess that, several years ago, I had sex (shudder) with an alien.
I think what LL means is, doesn’t the risk far out weigh the benefit here? I suppose it depends on your point of view.
Hell no, but I’m a masochist now.
Well, just in case you haven’t read the entirety of the thread, I’ll let you know a secret… I’m something of an idiot. Silly things like “risks” never occur to me. Anyway, it didn’t seem so dangerous to slide a Q-tip in an inch or two.
My head is spinning…
I just don’t get it SPOOFE, why? I mean it sounds like you do this sort of thing often, but why? I’m not making fun but, do you live alone? How can you do all these perverse acts if there are other people around?
I am still shivering about the whole Q-tip thing, doesn’t the cotton stick inside? I jam one of those in my ear and little bits of cotton come loose.