The "Would You Rather..." Game

Ok Dopers, it’s time for the “Would You Rather…” Game, otherwise known as “Choose Your Poison”.

The game works like this: Someone posts a scenario with two, and only two, answers. Another person replys with their pick and explains why they choose the answer they did. Then that person posts another scenario, and another person replys, and so on. The scenario always has to start with “Would You Rather…”.

For example,

Would You Rather…

*French kiss John Madden for 15 minutes and receive $5,000?


Go muff diving with This Women for a day and receive $5,000,000?*

[Johnny Bravo responds]

I’d rather french kiss John Madden for 15 minutes and receive $5,000.

Why?- As much as I would love to have $5,000,000 dollars, I just couldn’t bring myself to muff dive with that horrible looking women! I wouldn’t be able to make it through the day.

Ok, got it? Ok, here we go…

Woud You Rather…

Be hung, drawn, and quartered?


Boiled alive?*

  • Keeping in mind that in the practice hanging, drawing, and quartering, you are still alive when they take you off the scaffold.

Be hung, drawn, and quartered I think. If in that order. Can’t stand the heat.

**Would you rather be blind

or deaf? **
*btw; what’s muff dive? *

Muff diving = giving oral sex to a woman

(For clarification: I’m assuming I would become blind / deaf later in life and not born blind / deaf.)

I’d rather be deaf. Although I’m sure I would miss music and other sounds, I believe that I would cope better with deafness than blindness. I beleive that I would be able to be more self sufficient as a deaf person than as a blind person. (YMMV)

Would you rather attend your high school reunion naked OR have sex in front of your parents?

Sex in front of the parents. I don’t give a shit about them at all so it’s no big deal.
While having sex with a partner you care about, would you rather throw up all over him/her or have explosive diahrrea thereby soiling the sheets?

it’s a choice of partner or sheets…

Throw up on the partner. I would much rather have vomitus on me, than feces everywhere and I think my SO would say the same.

Okay, would you rather take a pill that made you 20x smarter but made you 20x uglier, or take a pill that made you 5x prettier/handsomer but 20x dumber?

I’m a union worker so I’d have to go with the smarter & dumber pill.

Would you rather be reincarnated as:

  1. a toilet
  2. an Insikerator™ garbage disposal

Whoops! Looks like I already took the pill!

I meant the handsomer/dumber pill.

I’ll take the Insinkerator, Alex.
Would you rather drink Rosie O’Donnells bathwater, or explain to your S/O how that lipstick/cumstain got on your collar/eyebrow.

Hmmm… since I’m not a person with a butt-fetish, I’d have to say garbage disposal. I guess it’s a matter of eliminating (no pun intended) the “middle man”, so to speak. Being a toilet would mean I’d be eating the same stuff as a garbage disposal, basically (minus egg shells and whatnot), but with an extra round of “processing” beforehand. :stuck_out_tongue:

OK, here’s mine…

Would you rather have the remainder of your sexual encounters for life be:

a) oral, or

b) anal?

In case (a) you’re the perpetual giver, and in (b) you’re the perpetual receiver. :eek:

So, it’s a choice between drinking bathwater and getting caught with a transvestite prostitute by my SO? I’ll have to go with the bathwater on this one.

Would you rather spend the night in a maximum security prison or a mental institution?

Mental institution. Since I’m already nuts, I might come out a better person. At the least, I’d have the most interesting stories the next day.

Would you rather…

be trapped alone forever on a deserted island, or spend the rest of your life married to your worst enemy?

Mental institution by far!

Would you rather be in pain or your SO be in pain? Honestly…

Ray Charles has set up a charity for the deaf. He claims he would rather be blind than deaf. Now you can say that is because of his special talent, but I don’t think so. I had three employees that were deaf. They were all very good workers and one especially stood out as exceptional not only at work, but in being a nice person. The problem is that they have difficulty understanding what is going on around them and their usable vocabulary is usually less than 200 words. If they write you a note it is something that needs to be deciphered since the sentences are never complete in any sense of the word. They tend to be paranoid, constantly thinking that people are talking about them (in my experience 2 out of the 3 were). I am not criticizing the deaf at all, but pointing out that unless they get an outstanding education, the world is pretty much shut off from them, more than it would be for the blind. I also think that people treat the blind more kindly because of the misconception that being deaf isn’t really that disabling. Sorry for the hijack. I really am not dissing your reason for making the choice you did, only stating some personal experiences that give a somewhat different slant to the problem. Also it is not impossible for a deaf person to overcome these obstacles, but we all need to understand that they exist.

Depends on the pain but I’d have to say my SO! :eek:

Would you rather have naked pictures of yourself all over the Internet for the rest of your life


Would you rather have your naked picture on a billboard for one week

Honestly I’d take the pain.

Would you prefer to:

*Spend one hour in a 6’ by 6’ room with 10,000 cockroaches


be made to listen to Barry Manilow for 72 hours straight?*

Billboard. My assumption here is that only the people who happened to be in my particular city would see my naked ass… whereas on the internet, muthaf*ckas halfway around the planet would be looking at my flappy little buns.

Oh–do I get to choose the pose?

72 hours 'o barry for me. I wasnt really a big creepshow fan :stuck_out_tongue:


“Would you rather…”

Eat your own feces?


Drink someone else’s urine?

I’ll take the urine. [hope he/she had some booze]

would you rather

Be French


Be Chinese?

Drink someone else’s urine, absolutely. Gandhi drank his own, so figure U can choke down somebody’s.

Feces might stick to the roof of my mouth.

Would you rather be assimilated by the pod people or destroyed?