Things I've learned

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
41

I’ve learned to always carry at least one camera (and preferably more).

I’ve learned that carrying a camera is more efficient if one buys film first and makes sure the camera is loaded.

I’ve learned that sometimes “because I want to” is a good enough reason.

I’ve learned that it’s okay to go to the Zoo in the middle of the week by myself just to look at the animals.

I’ve learned that it’s okay to want to be alone on occasion.

I’ve learned that it never hurts to ask for what you want.

I’ve learned that “no” isn’t all that painful to hear - or say.

I’ve learned that sometimes there is nothing more satisfying than driving down the road screaming at my inner critic - even if I look like a nutcase - because no-one else will notice and it shuts my critic up.

I’ve learned that although I love my mother, I cannot expect her to be supportive of everything I do.
Corollary: I have learned not to tell my mother when I’m about to do something I know she’ll tear down (sadly, including returning to college and taking up art).

I’ve learned that I am an artist, and the only person that can stop me is me (too bad I’m so good at it).

I’ve learned that I am strong enough.

I’ve learned that it’s okay not to date when you don’t meet anyone who meets your standards.

I’ve learned that sometimes you shouldn’t say anything, just offer a soft shoulder.

42

The two most important things I’ve learned were from reading old ‘Pogo’ cartoons.

#1 We have met the enemy. And they is us.

#2 Don’t take life so serious. It ain’t nohow permanent.

43

I am currently writing a letter of sorts to my as-yet-unborn children. Every year for the last few years, I write the things I have learned this year. I will definitely be including some of the things from this thread in there this year.

Here is a sample of what things I have learned that I want my children to know:

Smile. Read. Hope. Have parties. Don’t worry. Don’t frown. Have a pet. Learn as much as you can
Laugh—a lot
Have fun. Remember to be a kid when you are one
Be a good friend. Be the kind of friend you would like to have
Don’t lie—but learn the difference between a lie and a fib
Take responsibility
Learn humility so that you may win gracefully. Learn pride so that you may lose gracefully
Don’t put things off
Have your own opinions. Know when to get a second opinion, or a third
Spend time with your family
Understand that life is precious
Question authority—Do not follow blindly; be the leader instead
Don’t let what other people think decide who you are

Don’t be afraid of things:
Don’t be afraid of the truth
Don’t be afraid of consequences. That does not mean to ignore or not care what the consequences are—but to know what they are and not fear them
Don’t be afraid of being alone
Don’t be afraid of how you look
Don’t be afraid of being or looking silly
Don’t be afraid to be yourself
Don’t be afraid to laugh at yourself
Don’t be afraid of changes
Don’t be afraid of new things—better that you try something and regret it once than never try something and regret it always

Don’t let fear hold you back or keep you from doing anything

44

Silences don’t have to be awkward.

It’s often best to just listen.

You have taken yourself too seriously. (Lady bless you, Robert Heinlein.)

It’s important to be yourself–but it’s also fun to be someone else occasionally.

Violence can solve certain problems–specifically, those involving unprovoked violence directed at one’s self. It sucks, but sometimes it’s necessary.

Have faith in yourself. Believe that you can do it, whatever it may be. Sometimes, it won’t be true–but if you don’t believe, it will never be true.

45

I’ve learned:

  1. Administrative assistants are the backbone of any office. Of course, being one, I know this to be true.

  2. I can change a major belief in my life and still be quite happy. I have done this with both religion(from Roman Catholic to Reform Judaism) and computers (from PCs to my lovely iMac). Hands off my White Sox, though.

  3. Love is weird and wonderful.

  4. There is a false distinction between lowbrow and highbrow in culture that must be struggled against. Quality is all that matters, not the form.

  5. Elitism is not a dirty word, but the expression of all humanity’s innate duty to try it’s hardest. Being snobbish towards other humans, though, makes you deserving of a swift kick in the pants.

  6. It is possible to be by yourself and be perfectly happy for short periods.

  7. Sex is fun and useful. Anyone who tells you that it is only one or the other probably has either never had sex or has an unbalanced sex life.

  8. It is perfectly okay to have an active sexual fantasy life as long as it doesn’t interfere with having an active sex life (or lack of, if that is your choice).

  9. The Roman hierarchy of the Roman Catholic Church (and, for that matter, many other religions), despite platitudes to the contrary, doesn’t particularly trust women, and would like women to stop clamoring about their human rights in regards to abortion, ordination, contraception, etc.

  10. While there are plenty of bigoted and hateful jerks in the world, they are far outweighed by the rest of us, whoe believe in a live and let live. We may sometimes sit back a bit and let the nutcases run around, but we’re mainly good eggs.

46

-parents are not ogres.
-religion is a great comfort.
-going out to dinner and a movie by yourself can be really neato spiffy.
-when you’re in love, it doesn’t mean that you should neglect your friends.
-people drift apart sometimes.
-love sucks sometimes, but it’s worth it.
-one of the nicest things in the world is waking up next to someone that you love.
-hormones should be used responsible
-always, always choose your battles.

47

I have learned:

You can not expect to be comfortable looking at and touching someone else’s naked body until you are comfortable with your own

On the same note: A person in the throes of orgasm is a wonderful, powerful thing

If you truly hate your job, get out of it, life is too short to be miserable. Sometimes you have to trust that something else will come along.

If you have made the decision that you are not happy with your SO and are unwilling to work on it, make a clean break, holding on “for their sake” is a huge mistake

Sometimes saying you’re sorry in a fight doesn’t mean you are accepting total blame, it could just mean you are sorry the other person is hurting

The decision to trust your SO when apart is entirely up to you, but realize that the person has to consciously decide to potentially throw away everything they have with you to do it, do you really think so little of them?

Don’t bring your personal problems to work, but remember that seeming to be “perfect” and “unruffable” all the time alienates people too

Men like to be complimented too

If you want to be asked to dance at the bar, smile a lot and dance with the first guy who asks you, whether you think he’s good looking or not. Everyone will think you are approachable and you won’t sit out any songs you don’t want to

Be nice when someone approaches you in an attempt to pick you up, who does it hurt to be polite? (Exception to this rule, if they are rude or obnoxious, you don’t have to put up with that)

Always try a new food before you decide whether or not you like it

Remember that everyone, no matter what they look like now, had “an awkward stage” with zits, pimples, long arms and bad hair.

Laugh and lift your chin up before someone takes your picture and you will never take another bad one, ever

48

This seems like a good thread in which to post this, my anthem of late.

[Administrative note: Please do not reproduce something in its entirety unless you own the copyright or you are absolutely certain it is in the public domain. You can excerpt it . . . and link to it where it IS reproduced legally. Sorry to do this to you; it’s a great poem.
your humble TubaDiva]

***Antilamentation ** (Dorianne Laux)

Regret nothing. Not the cruel novels you read
to the end just to find out who killed the cook.
Not the insipid movies that made you cry in the dark,
in spite of your intelligence, your sophistication.
Not the lover you left quivering in a hotel parking lot,
the one you beat to the punchline, the door, or the one
who left you in your red dress and shoes, the ones
that crimped your toes, don’t regret those. . . *

Antilamentation

[Edited by TubaDiva on 08-23-2000 at 04:06 PM]

49

Magdalene, that is a fantastic poem. Is there a book?

50

I have learned to visit a zoo with children. Giraffes are taller, elephants afe bigger and tigers have more stripes.

I have learned that eating a full plate of whipped cream gives me stomach aches.

I have learned that dirt can be washed… from kids, clothes, cars and floors.

I have learned that running through sprinklers is fun and makes the neighbors wonder about you.

I have learned that you can’t kiss your kids too much, even in front of their friends.

I have learned that pets can be ticked off at you, specially birds.

I have learned to keep some dreams and ideas to myself. Nay-sayers are just too happy to try and make them look ridiculous.

I have learned that criticism and feedback are not the same. The first one crushes motivation, the other one makes it soar.

Feathersea

51

Here’s a link with more info about the poet:

http://webdelsol.com/LITARTS/laux/

To fit the intent of the OP, here’s some stuff I learned:

The sexiest part of a person is the brain.

When you are freaking out, trying to make an important decision, ask yourself “what’s the worst that can happen?” Chances are you can handle it whatever you choose.

Age doesn’t matter in love.

Action is better than inaction. Take chances. Try stuff.

When you are angry or upset, take a long walk.

Try to solve your relationship and friendship problems within the actual relationship, ie, by talking to the other person directly.

52

This thread revival (and heck, I’m thrilled it made “Threadspotting!”) offers me a chance to share a few more things…

Laughter is priceless in a relationship, and can be every bit as intimate and fun as making love.

I feel fatter if I’m not exercising.

My classroom doesn’t have to be perfectly ready for the first day of school…just ready.

Tie dye never completely goes out of style.

Hell isn’t as fearful a concept as nothingness.

Cutting off a wart doesn’t get rid of it, and sometimes even spreads them elsewhere. Doh.

Not everyone masturbates, and that’s okay. Really!

Being published isn’t what defines a writer…only writing does.

If the kitchen sink smells a little foul, grinding lemon wedges in the disposal really freshens things up.

The more underwear you have, the less you need to do laundry.

53

i have learned that it is totally worth it to drive 30 minutes out of your way while almost out of gas just to tell someone you love them

ive learned to follow your gut feelings… call ahead if youre convinced youre just going to have to turn around and go back home as soon as you get somewhere (especially if youre not particularly inclined to go)

i’ve learned that youre more likely to miss people you care about when you know you wont see them much…so make the best of the time you have with them

i’ve learned that theres no point staying angry at the dog for eating a slice of cake, because it just ruins your day and its not like he knows that he did anything wrong 15 minutes after hes already done it

and all of this was just in the past couple of hours…

54

whelp, let’s see…
I’ve learned that

When moving to a new state, dont’ ever compare the new state to your old one, cuz all it does is tick people(not just natives) off. (Jarrod didn’t have too many friends when he moved to Georgia)

On that note, people as a whole really don’t care about petty details about you; what’s the point? So it’s useless to be insecure (assuming your insecurity is controllable).

Though people are naturally self centered, most are genuinely honorable. It usually is profitable to be kind even to your most hated enemy.

Anger is, for the most part, controllable. Yes, I know, I’m a heartless bstrd. ususally, tho, when you’re mad, you look for more reasons to justify the anger, and you find 'em. So, it’s kindof like you wanna be mad. Though there are some things out there I can’t help getting mad over.

Never, in a high school known for it’s snobbery, say too loudly that you plan on, God forbid, joining the military. They all assume that military is synonomous with ‘not going to college’. Forget the fact that I’m gonna protect their butts, that it’s a job that I feel I was meant for, but, heck, since it means I’m ‘not going to college’ (completely not the case), well that means I’m beneath them. And they treated me thusly. Lost a lot of friends that day (though I don’t regret it :)).

Members of the high school ‘club’ FCA (Fellowship of Christian Athletes) don’t appreciate it when you tell them that their ‘club’ is, by definition, unconstitutional.

If you’re in the Bible Belt, you will be surprised daily on how much mixing of religion and state is allowed.

No matter how careful a driver you are, you cannot anticipate idiots. Found that out today in my first car wreck, a month after getting my licence. I thought waiting til I was 18 would help me avoid that, but apparently I was wrong.

And I think that’s it for now.

55

Baking powder?

56

[li]Before you sign a document, read the whole thing.[/li][li]Always read the fine print.[/li]Read all the instructions before starting something.

57

  • Different groups of friends can see you in totally different ways. This is mostly determined by how confident you feel among them.

  • Sometimes a relationship will never work, no matter how much each party wants it to.

  • Look at things in the long term. No matter how bad things are today, in 100 years, you’ll be dead.

  • Almost nothing is as big a deal as it seems at first.

  • If you are in a position to be a part of a group hug, you should consider yourself a rich, rich person.

  • Don’t watch too much TV. Dear God, don’t watch too much TV. If you’re going to college, I would suggest not bringing a TV.

58

I’ve learned that even at 26 I’m afraid of my sexuality

I’ve learned that as much as I don’t want to need it, I still need my parents’ love

I’ve learned that being afraid of ones sexuality causes all sorts of confusion

I’ve learned that parents who can’t overcome their own fears of sexuality effectively abandon a large part of their children’s maturation

I’ve learned that I can overcome most of my fears, and hope to learn to overcome this one, too

I’ve learned that money, while useful, only goes so far no matter how much of it you have

I’ve learned that amateur porn is often better than professional porn

59

OK, um, stuff I’ve learned:

If you like it, it will get cancelled or otherwise vanish. (TV, food)

Your mother WILL find your diary, no matter how well you hide it. Better not to keep one at all.

Um, the rest of this stuff only makes to people who play role-playing games, but nonetheless:

Buy armor first.
Carry extra healing items.
Put the mage in the back!
The person with the revive spell will get killed first.
Save!
Birds hate arrows and lightning.
Get the spear, not the lance.
You can’t have too many healers.

60

There exist in this world many idiots. They all have drivers licenses, and they often travel in packs.

A sibling is not someone to be cast aside or loathed. They are to be treasured and loved, regardless of how well you “get along” with them.

It doesn’t really matter what others think of you if you can face yourself at the end of the day happy and without regret.

Wal Mart is tolerable only at 2am.