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Babies poop. A lot. Like, 5 diaper changes within a 20 minute time frame. And I swear, she waits for me, like she’s taunting me. And don’t get me started on projectile pooping. That’s a whole different thread.
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Don’t tilt a baby’s head lower than her body directly after a feeding. Gravity is a bitch and I just washed that bedspread.
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Baby hiccups sound like tree frogs.
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Sometimes when she cries, she’s not hungry, dirty or gassy. she just wants to be held.
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Feeding her at 5am in a quiet house while the spouse gets some much-needed sleep is my favorite time.
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Its worth it 100 times over.
You have violated a cardinal rule. We require pictures.
Congrats, though! It gets even better as they get older. My little girl is turning 2 next month and she’s hilarious.
Great post! Thanks for the morning smile…
Unfortunately, spouse doesn’t want public pics on the internet. She’s beautiful though!
Bet you also learned that, from the first minute, she has her own unique personality. 
Best of all is the sneeze-pooping sans nappy, how on earth we got that wall clean I’ll never know!
As dear as a baby girl is, you’re missing the fun of having a baby boy pee on you while trying to change his diaper. Regardless, enjoy these days; they fly by all too quickly.
Congratulations!
We had a baby a few months ago and being the father of a newborn taught me to appreciate my Netflix streaming feature as I was watching old Mystery Science Theater episodes nightly at 2am with a half-sleeping newborn in my lap while the wife got some sleep.
On a sappier note, ours makes some sound when he’s “righting” himself after sneezing or burping that’s my wife’s favorite sound in the world. Sort of a “ahh-Buh!” noise. sneezesneeze*…ahh-Buh!
I was sleep deprived for months as a result, but you’re right - and I miss it now.
Man, all the Bros did was the “pee all over the good clothes” thing, and only once each of them. After a few of these threads, I’ve come to realize they were terribly well-behaved poop-wise (yeah, they sometimes needed changing again before you’d finished tying the onesies back up - but no projectile pooping).
Yeah, my kid was a poop cannon there for a while. She managed to poop on the curtains at least three times.
Sleep deprived father of a 3 week (and three day) old checking in:
Oh my god. Projectile pooping. I had no idea such a concept existed until she had a fountain of orangish/brown come out her backside. Thank god for fast reflexes, but the image alone still haunts me.
And hiccups. I feel so bad for her because she gets them all the time, but she doesn’t seem to mind. What’s the worst is when she hiccups, burps and farts simultaneously which I had no clue was physically possible.
Heh. Not a mom here, but I’ve been pooped on by both my nephews - “dammit, I thought he was finished before I started changing him!”
It sounds like you are doing really well - congratulations! Just don’t let anyone convince you your baby should sleep all night or never cry or have gas pains, and you’ll do fine. I swear most of the anxiety in new parenting comes from screwed up social ideas of what babies can/should do! Sometimes, they just need to cry and need you to hold them while they do it.
I’ll never forget changing my younger daughter in those early days, and a RIVER OF POOP started coming out of her. Luckily I had a few prefolds around as well as a changing pad, and amongst all of that, nothing got on the furniture. But it was completely astounding.
Lying back with a napping baby on your chest/belly has got to be the most delicious feeling in the world.
The two most useful things I learned a decade ago when my kids were babies:
- You can’t spoil a baby. The more love and attention, the better.
- You can stop an attack of croup by running the shower and holding the baby in the steamy bathroom.
But aside from that, for the new dads here, I come to recommend this book: The Poo Bomb. It chronicles the first year of the author’s daughter’s life, making fun of the situation, with complete lack of reverence for the whole process. The title comes from a bit in week 5.
This thread is wonderful.
You have so many more great things to look forward to. My son is now just over one year old. Some of my best memories so far are: The first time he smiled at me, first time I was able to make him laugh, and the first time he came to me when I called him. I’m still waiting for the first time he calls me “Daddy”. I’m sure I’ll melt.
The way they look at you, too, when they’re pooping. I was changing my niece’s diaper. She had filled it up, and I had just laid her on a clean diaper when she started again. So I decided to wait it out. She filled that one up. So I cleaned her again and laid down a new one. And then she filled that one up! All the time looking at me with those big round eyes, like “Auntie, wait, there’s more.”
Gross and cute all at the same time.
mozchron, your sneak-bragging is forgiven, this time. Congratulations! May she always be comforted when you hold her.